Are you honest with your teen(s) about what it takes to maintain their current lifestyle?
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
There’s a lot of downward mobility that’s happening and will happen this decade and next —
How honest are you with your teens about what it takes to maintain the lifestyle they are receiving right now? Specifically fams that are educated and work professional jobs but not leaving 10+ million in assets to your children |
Anonymous
| I don’t have to have this conversation with my child. I don’t make $$$$$ and I live within my means. My kid works and pays for some of his expenses as a college student- books, car insurance, etc. He has learned how to be frugal and bargain shop. |
Anonymous
| They don't have a lifestyle? We are frugal. They know stuff costs money and they will need to be gainfully employed. We actually do have millions in assets, and may help them down the road, but they also integrated not to touch capital, and to only spend dividends, so it's not like they're going to blow the money on Ferraris and such. |
Anonymous
|
Yes, I am. My DD is talking about low paying careers and I keep reminding her that those careers will not support her high maintenance life style.
It's a a disservice to let her think otherwise. |
Anonymous
| We live in the bubble of Langley, Virginia and I told my kids that if they want to maintain this lifestyle, they need to improve their EQ because having high IQ will allow them to live in Falls Church but having high EQ will improve their chance to live in Langley. Money comes and goes but EQ will stay with them to be successful in life. |
Anonymous
Ha! I tell my kids something similar, without the geographic part. |
Anonymous
And you think Langley is better than Falls Church because…? |
Anonymous
| Yes, so my DS has now decided he wants to become a surgeon in a challenging speciality. Thumbs up from me! |
Anonymous
|
Absolutely, which is why what they pick as a major in college is important and spending $80K/year on a major that won't have a good ROI makes zero sense.
My younger DC wants to go out of state, but won't be majoring in STEM. Just want's to "get out of x state". I told DC that unless they pick a major that will have good ROI, we are not going to spend that much money just because they want to get out of x state. If they want to leave the state so badly they can get a job in some other state on their dime. We also had to have a discussion about taxes and take home pay. They will hear "50K" for a salary and think that's awesome, and they can live really well in a hcol area on $50k. I brought them down to earth when I explained how much taxes would get taken out, health insurance, and 401k contribution, and what their actual take home would be as a single, childless person. That was a big shocking moment for them. |
Anonymous
+1 Yes, we are upfront that our lifestyle requires a high HHI so don’t get too comfortable. We also share our earlier financial struggles in an effort to have them appreciate everything we have. |
Anonymous
+2 Ours are teens and we also talk about what things currently cost- including things like auto and homeowners insurance, utility bills, cable/WiFi bill, and other recurring expenses. Most kids know about mortgages and vehicles, maybe tuition, but have no idea of all the “other” stuff that adds up. |
Anonymous
Mine wants to be a cosmetic surgeon. That works to her interests and ability currently, but I also have to reiterate to her constantly how difficult that path is, and how much effort goes into it. |
Anonymous
I’d so thumbs down this. I’m a college drop out who makes a lot more than most surgeons in sales and had no school debt. Becoming a surgeon is $$$ |
Anonymous
| Yes. She'll never be a dermatologist with that kind of tiktok habit. |
Anonymous
Yup. And we also make our kids pay for most of their extras via chores and jobs. |