Written agreement as a compromise

[Anonymous]

Spouse really wants a dog and I don’t. I don’t see the point of pet ownership to begin with but anyway, I’m thinking if this is a hill to die on, then I would want us to sign a written agreement first to indicate that Spouse understands I will spend zero time, money, and effort on this dog. This means that Spouse has to understand I’m never going to do any of the following such as walking the dog, paying for medical needs, or cleaning up dog poop/pee/vomit on the carpet. Spouse can do all of that and I do not want to help in any way with regards to the dog. Has anyone done this and how did it work out for you at home?

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you are treating your spouse like he’s 13.

[Anonymous]

I think this is smart. Almost like a postnuptial agreement on division of care of animals, and it sounds like the spouse would try to guilt the OP otherwise into caring for it. Having it in writing makes it irrefutable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think this is smart. Almost like a postnuptial agreement on division of care of animals, and it sounds like the spouse would try to guilt the OP otherwise into caring for it. Having it in writing makes it irrefutable.

+1. If OP had faith that this would never happen, they wouldn’t want it written down. Do it, OP.

[Anonymous]

I only hope that when you want something and your spouse doesn't, that they make you sign an agreement as to whether they will help you out if help is needed or if something goes wrong.

If my spouse asked me to sign an agreement like what you are proposing, it would set off alarm bells in my head. Out of spite, I would be looking to get back at my spouse as soon as they wanted something that I didn't want.

[Anonymous]

If one spouse doesn't want a dog as much as OP doesn't want a dog, there shouldn't be a dog

[Anonymous]

My spouse didn't want a dog either. Meanwhile they just left on their daily trip to the "splash park" (a park with a stream) where they walk and look animals and swim. When they get home they will nap on the couch and ignore me, the one who wanted the dog.

[Anonymous]

Wow OP, announcing that you will literally never ever help your spouse with something because it doesn't directly benefit you? That's a bit much, don't you think? Go on and file for divorce now and save everyone some trouble.

[Anonymous]

This belongs in the relationship forum, not the pets forum. This whole signing an agreement thing...it is a result of failure to compromise, communicate, and respect each other.

[Anonymous]

So if you’re home and spouse is not and the dog needs to go out. You would just watch the dog stand by the door and do nothing?
Then when the dog gets to the point of being horribly distressed and pees/defacates on the floor you’ll still do nothing?
You are a horrible person.
We have 2 dogs that I brought to the relationship. Spouse not a dog person. I do 80% of the dog work but if I’m at work then spouse let’s them out and feeds them if need be. She won’t walk them, but she’s not gonna not open the door and let them out. That’s awful.

[Anonymous]

It won’t work for you to never do anything for the dog- does he travel?

[Anonymous]

No. Don't be cruel to the dog. It won't understand what's going on. If you don't want a dog - don't get one. Period.

[Anonymous]

OP: You realize that dogs can't read--right ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spouse really wants a dog and I don’t. I don’t see the point of pet ownership to begin with but anyway, I’m thinking if this is a hill to die on, then I would want us to sign a written agreement first to indicate that Spouse understands I will spend zero time, money, and effort on this dog. This means that Spouse has to understand I’m never going to do any of the following such as walking the dog, paying for medical needs, or cleaning up dog poop/pee/vomit on the carpet. Spouse can do all of that and I do not want to help in any way with regards to the dog. Has anyone done this and how did it work out for you at home?

OP: Do you feel the same way about children ?

[Anonymous]

This should be in the relationship forum and not pets. Wow this is a little bonkers.