Spouse wants to reconcile but is apparently unable to go no contact
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Anonymous
| That's it. I think I just need you all to tell me what I need to hear so I can file, once and for all. I wanted this so badly, for my whole family. I believed in it. I fought for it. And I am tired: physically, emotionally, mentally. |
Anonymous
| And sorry, I wasn't clear. This is reconciliation post-affair. Lol though - "post" affair is more like it. |
Anonymous
| How long? |
Anonymous
| So he had an affair and wants to reconcile with you, but cannot stop contact with the affair partner? Is that what you’re saying? |
Anonymous
|
So he says he wants to reconcile but he still talks to the AP?
How long ago was D-day? |
Anonymous
| I’m sure he wants to have his cake and eat it too. We all do. But it’s a sign he’s not really sorry except that he got caught. |
Anonymous
| The affair isn't over until they go No Contact. |
Anonymous
| You deserve better. <3 |
Anonymous
| So sorry you are in this position, but if he won’t stop contacting his affair partner he isn’t serious about reconciling with you. This is your sign and as devastating as it is (and I know how it is myself) it is as clear as day. Good luck. |
Anonymous
| Thank you everyone. Keep 'em coming. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| Where’s OP? |
Anonymous
| OP can you provide a little more info. Was this long term? What are the circumstances? Kids involved? Is he a loser player, or going through some kind of personal crisis? What is his explanation for not being able to go NC? |
Anonymous
| Is there a valid reason, like working with affair partner or being otherwise deeply enmeshed? |
Anonymous
|
Dealbreaker. Spouse broke it off, got rid of all means to be contacted/contact, went to therapy and then confessed. If she’s ever to make contact - no response to her and tells me immediately.
If any contact or lying or covering up contact- buh-bye. OP- there is no way I could even consider reconciling if he were in contact. I’m so sorry. I know how completely brutal and traumatizing this is. |