Confronted by another mom about birthday party

[Anonymous]

This year I had a small slumber party for my dd (13). Two hours before the party a mom of a girl who was not invited called me to say that she had heard about the party but could not find the evite and needed to know the time for drop off. It was completely awkward as my daughter likes this girl but was only given permission to invite four close friends. The girl of the mother that called is friends with my daughter but by no means close. The whole thing was completely awkward. I am frankly pretty shocked that the mom called me and did this. It have been feeling guilty all weekend.

[Anonymous]

Did your daughter tell the other girl she was invited?

[Anonymous]

I would assume your daughter told the other girl she was invited. Also, who does an evite for a small slumber party? I just send a text to my son's friends' moms or dads.

[Anonymous]

Somebody invited the girl...your daughter or another friend. I don't think you were "confronted."

[Anonymous]

That is beyond rude of this other mom. We all understand - just like at weddings - that the guest cutoff must be made sonmewhere.

[Anonymous]

So word. She was trying to guilt you into an invite. What a psycho.

[Anonymous]

Either the mom is nuts and wanted to aggressively call you out for not inviting her daughter, or there was a genuine misunderstanding (maybe one of the invitees thought it was a bigger party and talked about it to this girl as though she thought she was invited?) and she wanted to make sure her DD attended the party she was invited to and didn't miss out because she lost track of an invite (that wasn't).

Either way the appropriate response is just "this year's party is really small since it's a sleepover, sorry for any confusion."

[Anonymous]

Check with DD, she probably told the other kid she was invited. Been there.

[Anonymous]

So how did the conversation end? Did you allow her to come?

[Anonymous]

You may not know the full story. Perhaps her daughter assumed she was invited and said as much to her mother.

The daughter could have lied to her mother or she could have assumed the lack of invitation was an oversight.

I’ve been invited to parties before by people I don’t know well and wondered if the evite was sent by mistake. I suppose this could work the other way.

[Anonymous]

She wasn't confronting you - she probably assumed, incorrectly, that her daughter had been invited because her daughter told her she had been invited. That may have been wishful thinking on the daughter's part, or may have been an actual misunderstanding.

[Anonymous]

This was not a confrontation. It was a misunderstanding. For some reason the mom thought her kid was invited. She knew the date of the party and the host, so she didn’t pull the information out of thin air.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like someone invited her.

I would have just said, we would have loved to have Larla as the girls seem to get along well, but we limited the party 4 kids due to costs or what ever the reason. Let's try to get the girls together soon. Have a great weekend.

[Anonymous]

So OP just tells us half the story. What happened?!

[Anonymous]

The girls were probably bragging about the party to kids not invited. How else did they find out?