Boyfriend dumped me and I don’t know why

[Anonymous]

I’m in a really odd situation. My boyfriend of a year recently broke up with me and I have no idea why. Our relationship has been wonderful from my perspective. We are solid friends, have good sex, similar hobbies, laugh a lot together, and find each other hot. Recently our relationship started to progress. He introduced me to his parents (it went well) and we’d been upping the amount of time we spend together.

Out of the blue he started shutting down. Just being more quiet than usual. This lasted several days. I asked what was up and he said nothing. Then he texted one day and said he wanted to end things with no explanation. When I tried to talk about it he pushed me away.

I’m at a loss for what happened. I suspect he will reach out again one day. We really had a fun way of relating to each other. But I don’t think I can get over how it ended. Would you just block and delete.

[Anonymous]

I would not block him, but I would ignore him, even if reached out in the future. Like never talk or message him back again. I know it's hard, but if he ends things via text with no explanation then you don't want him anyway.

[Anonymous]

That stinks OP. But you dodged a bullet from a coward since he can’t even give you an explanation.

You should block and delete. If he comes crawling back, it can be hate to say no. He’s shown you who he is and who he is won’t change. Don’t give him the opportunity to play mind games with you.

[Anonymous]

You dodged a bullet. Move on.

[Anonymous]

Ignore any further attempts to contact you. He is a weak, immature man, not a serial killer. Consider that he has met someone else. Men typically leave when they have other options.

[Anonymous]

Wow that is horrible. Were there any red flags in hindsight?

[Anonymous]

He’s been seeing someone else. To shutdown and end it with no explanation, there’s someone else in his life.

[Anonymous]

I would want to know the why too. I would consider asking if he can tell you in a text even.
I would not get back with him though, the way he ended it is not cool and shows his character.

[Anonymous]

What does it matter why he did it? I don't mean to sound harsh, but most the time people make up the reason anyways to spare the other person hurt feelings (i.e. it's not you, it's me). Something was not there for him, or faded. He is a coward though. I recently broke up with my SO of about a year. I did it in person and it was extremely difficult to do. Even a phone call would have been better than a text. I agree with the PPs. You dodged a bullet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow that is horrible. Were there any red flags in hindsight?

There really were not a ton of red flags I could think of. He is a little standoffish with respect to emotional intimacy. However over time he started to let me in more.

[Anonymous]

I would definitely delete (you should be able to commiserate with friends over wine and not worry about sending a tipsy text) and probably block. As others have said, you dodged a bullet. Breaking up in that manner after being together over a year is incredibly inconsiderate and callous. Even if he no longer wants to be with you, he should care enough about your feelings to end things more maturely. We're all adults here.

[Anonymous]

Delete him from your phone but give a good friend his number in case you ever need it for some reason (who knows what that could be - you left something of value at his place and would like him to return it? you find something of his? who knows) but instruct them not to give it to you when you've been drinking

I'm sorry you're going through this. Sounds like it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him. If it was about you, he would have told you.

[Anonymous]

He's immature and cruel not to tell you. But it's probably because his family really disliked you, or because he knows he just doesn't want to marry you, so he'd rather cut it off now.

[Anonymous]

That would really mess me up. It would be next to impossible not to try to get him to tell me why, but my advice is definitely that you stay no contact and get into some heavy distraction. Easier said than done I know. Take it one minute and hour and day at a time. We’re here to talk!

[Anonymous]

His parents didn't like you.