Do you parents/ILs pay for

[Anonymous]

Private School tuition? If so, all or some/how much/is it on a regular basis? Do you expect them to pay? How often do you or your spouse ask them? Are there other regular payments that they make or that you expect them to make?

[Anonymous]

My ex-FIL pays for college and grad school for all the grandkids.

[Anonymous]

No. They never paid for my private schools - it was a company perk of our expatriate lifestyle. As Europeans, they would have conniptions over the cost of tuition over here! They did contribute to my wedding, as a gift, and gave us a zero-interest loan for our home's downpayment, which was promptly repaid.

[Anonymous]

No, they don’t.
No, we don’t.
We would never ask them to.

Both sets of grandparents have contributed generously to college funds, but that was their own idea. We are very grateful, of course. But it’s not expected. Again, we would never ASK anyone to pay for our child’s education.

[Anonymous]

My parents pay $25K toward my DD's private school tuition which runs around $40k a year. They volunteered to contribute when we were applying. We accepted and they decided how much they were willing to contribute. Both my parents and my ILs have opened 529 accounts for DD. We never asked they just volunteered. My ILs had already opened ones for their other grandchildren and contribute equal amounts so it was kind of standard practice within the family. We could afford the full private school tuition and college savings but we appreciate the help.

[Anonymous]

No, but my grandmother paid for my and my siblings, college and private school. Mom isn't as generous.

[Anonymous]

No. It would be nice! But no.

I know people whose parents have offered and do it though. They have significant inter generational wealth.

My folks have wealth but no trust funds or anything.

[Anonymous]

We don’t expect anything from them, nor do we ever ask.

What they have done/do:
-private school tuition, roughly $40k x 2
-$15-$16k annual gift for each of us (so x 4)
-wedding gift of $500k + a $1.7M trust
-we typically join them for an annual vacation at a property they own and if it works out, we fly privately with them and they won’t let us pay for anything while we are there

[Anonymous]

if you can't afford to raise your kids the way you want then don't have them.
I wouldn't dream of having someone else pay my kids' way in anything.

[Anonymous]

Yes. They insisted we send our kids to private school to continue the tradition in our family

[Anonymous]

My friend has all three of hers in private and mentioned how hard it was because so many others have grandparents that pay. I thought that was the weirdest thing to say, but now I realize that it isn't at all uncommon.

[Anonymous]

Nothing. They have made promises over the years, such as to help with a preschool and other things but then when it came to paying, they never paid. We learned to ignore all money comments.

[Anonymous]

No.

We never have asked nor would we expect them to. The ILs do contribute to college funds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, they don’t.
No, we don’t.
We would never ask them to.

Both sets of grandparents have contributed generously to college funds, but that was their own idea. We are very grateful, of course. But it’s not expected. Again, we would never ASK anyone to pay for our child’s education.

Ok, by the question was do they pay for not do you ask them to pay for and your answer is yes. It’s not necessarily a binary thing, but you’re saying no when the answer (for you) is actually yes. Weird.

[Anonymous]

No, grandparents aren't in a position to pay. That said, I have a couple friends who have parents or ILs that pay. They also pay for family vacations and I assume contribute to college funds.