Family of 5, appx $300K HHI - would you do anything different?

[Anonymous]

2 working parents, family of 3. I feel like we are hemorrhaging cash and I just wondered if this is the way it is or if we should be doing something different with our money. Thanks for any thoughts and sorry for the vagueness in some areas.

These are what I think of as our major expenditures:
-Groceries / Food are an expense; as are gas / electric / water / trash
-3 kids - they all do various extracurricular activities that cost money & paying for summer camps costs money
-we do put away college savings for kids (not sure exact amount)
-We do save for retirement (not sure exact amount)
-we have 2 car payments (one is $380/mo. and I would guess the other is similar but not sure)
-our regular mortgage is $2800/mo. on a 30 year mortgage but we are actually paying an additional $1600 a month to pay it off in 15 years (which is 5 years from now). I did ask my husband if we should stop that extra payment and he said he would rather cut back on other things and pay off the house (though I suppose this is still open for discussion).
-we are still paying $270/month for my loans
-we are paying $200/month for life insurance (I think)
-i do pay $130 every other week for house cleaning

We have done very minimal work on our house in the past 10 years and did recently have some large things that needed to be done for appx $15K.

Things I have cut back on:
*We cut cable and for some reason that bothers me - but I feel like I can't justify adding it back in
*Used to go on dates with my husband doing activities or trying new restaurants but I feel like I can't justify that expense all that often now
*Used to go to shows / concerts but feel like I can't justify that expense so often
*As mentioned, groceries / food are an expense but starting in 2023 I have really tried to cut out eating out / take out for just out family of 5 and to really only eat out socially
*Historically travel has been a vice of mine, but I am trying to cut back on that.

What if anything would you do differently? Thanks!

[Anonymous]

I highly recommend YNAB. It is a budget software/app that will help you plan out where you want to spend your money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:2 working parents, family of 3. I feel like we are hemorrhaging cash and I just wondered if this is the way it is or if we should be doing something different with our money. Thanks for any thoughts and sorry for the vagueness in some areas.

These are what I think of as our major expenditures:
-Groceries / Food are an expense; as are gas / electric / water / trash
-3 kids - they all do various extracurricular activities that cost money & paying for summer camps costs money
-we do put away college savings for kids (not sure exact amount)
-We do save for retirement (not sure exact amount)
-we have 2 car payments (one is $380/mo. and I would guess the other is similar but not sure)
-our regular mortgage is $2800/mo. on a 30 year mortgage but we are actually paying an additional $1600 a month to pay it off in 15 years (which is 5 years from now). I did ask my husband if we should stop that extra payment and he said he would rather cut back on other things and pay off the house (though I suppose this is still open for discussion).
-we are still paying $270/month for my loans
-we are paying $200/month for life insurance (I think)
-i do pay $130 every other week for house cleaning

We have done very minimal work on our house in the past 10 years and did recently have some large things that needed to be done for appx $15K.

Things I have cut back on:
*We cut cable and for some reason that bothers me - but I feel like I can't justify adding it back in
*Used to go on dates with my husband doing activities or trying new restaurants but I feel like I can't justify that expense all that often now
*Used to go to shows / concerts but feel like I can't justify that expense so often
*As mentioned, groceries / food are an expense but starting in 2023 I have really tried to cut out eating out / take out for just out family of 5 and to really only eat out socially
*Historically travel has been a vice of mine, but I am trying to cut back on that.

What if anything would you do differently? Thanks!

Don't cut back on date night. You'd be shocked at how important it is to a marriage.

[Anonymous]

-The extra $1600/mo on the mortgage should be going into the market to grow

-$700-800/mo in car payments seems like a lot. Can you pay one off or buy a used vehicle

-You should know exact amount of college and retirement savings to be able to fully understand your finances and get accurate answers here.

[Anonymous]

If you don’t know where you are spending by money, ex how much your car payments are, you should address that first.

Without all the info and just looking at the big line items, are you on the same page as your partner re: paying off house in 15 years? That’s a big decision that requires “sacrifice” in one way or another, of other goals/priorities. You should be aligned on that.

[Anonymous]

If you have a low interest rate on your mortgage, it would make more sense to pay it off over a longer period of time and save the money for retirement or your kids' college funds.

Unless you're trying to retire soon, you shouldn't need to skimp so much. Try to enjoy your life!

[Anonymous]

Most of this is so vague it is difficult to be helpful. How do you not know at least approximately how much you save for retirement and kids college? You might be over or under savings, we can't tell you without numbers.

Same with activities. Could be soccer (reasonable expense) or you own a horse for each kid (probably unreasonable expense).

What is the interest rate on your student loans? My guess is you'd come out ahead paying those down faster and lowering your extra mortgage payment. Just a guess though assuming you refinanced when rates were lower and your student loan rate is fixed at a higher rate.

The most important question is how much, if any, extra do you have per month? You should have extra at $300K, if you don't there's a spending problem.

[Anonymous]

Hopefully you refinanced when rates were low and if you did then definitely do not try and pay off the mortgage early. Maybe do house cleaning once a month instead, or every 3 weeks.
Try cooking cheaper recipes that are still healthy. Cut back on meat. Soups are healthy and cheap, and you can make large quantities easily.

[Anonymous]

Pay off the cars with the mortgage money. If you have a sub %3 loan. Put the extra to pay off higher interest debt and put the rest in the market.

[Anonymous]

Thanks again! I’ll try to come up with interest rate on some of these things - car v mortgage v student loan for example and see what is best to pay off - that is the kind of advice I was hoping for so thanks already!!!

I will try to come back with more specifics shortly. For example, the kids don’t each have a horse

That info I have access to in various locations and I do have to add it up.

I also meant to say I have a peloton that I have debating selling - $39/month payment.

[Anonymous]

I have to imagine that your student loans are carrying a higher interest rate than your mortgage. Plus, you can't borrow again your student loans if something happens. Stop prepaying your mortgage, and throw some of that payment towards your loans, and move the rest around so you have some more enjoyment.

[Anonymous]

I would cut all the subscription things youre not using. We are at $300k with two kids (one in daycare) and we watch our budget and we have similar PITI as you and no student loans and no car payments. But we also save a lot and save in market/Cds dor new cars and home repairs and vacations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have to imagine that your student loans are carrying a higher interest rate than your mortgage. Plus, you can't borrow again your student loans if something happens. Stop prepaying your mortgage, and throw some of that payment towards your loans, and move the rest around so you have some more enjoyment.

Depends how old her student loans are. I’m 43 and mine are at 1.8%. My house is at 2.5%. I’m accelerating neither! The car payments sound high. A couple should only have one car payment at a time, if they must have a car payment at all. Cars are depreciating assets and should not be financed.

[Anonymous]

OP, you are classic over spenders, trying to keep up with your neighbors. Your husband doesn't seem that smart on financial things. Go get some professional help from a financial planner.

[Anonymous]

Seems weird to post you are “hemorrhaging cash” and yet not know what you are saving for college, what you are saving for retirement, and not know the amount of one of your car loans or your life insurance payment.

Do you even know what the kids activities and food bills are? It doesn’t sound like it.

What does your family bring in each month exactly and what do you spend each month exactly? Until you know these things, you can’t make educated changes.