How do I write the name in the address of a sympathy card to an aunt whose husband recently died?

[Anonymous]

That's the question. Is it Mrs. [his name]? Mrs. [her name]? Just [her name]?

[Anonymous]

I would do it the way you’ve always done it. If you’ve never addressed something to her before, I would do Mrs. (His name) Smith.

[Anonymous]

Formally and traditionally, she is and always will be Mrs. John Smith - unless of course she marries again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Formally and traditionally, she is and always will be Mrs. John Smith - unless of course she marries again.

No, just no. Use her actual first name and whatever last name she used. Women are not their husbands’ property!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Formally and traditionally, she is and always will be Mrs. John Smith - unless of course she marries again.

That is outdated.

For this, OP should address the card to [Aunt's First Name] [Aunt's Last Name]. If you must, use Mrs. [Aunt's First Name] [Aunt's Last Name].

When extending sympathy, a reminder of the person she just lost is a terrible practice. So calling her Mrs. [Uncle's First Name] [Uncle's Last Name] is just insensitive in this situation.

[Anonymous]

Sympathy cards aren't to be addressed formally anyway, especially to your family member.

[Anonymous]

Thank you for your advice.
-- OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Formally and traditionally, she is and always will be Mrs. John Smith - unless of course she marries again.

No, just no. Use her actual first name and whatever last name she used. Women are not their husbands’ property!

This, 100%

How to address it? How about HER name?

[Anonymous]

I usually go with a "Ms. First Name Last Name" when I'm not sure. For some older traditional women, they like using the old style, even when widowed. You know your aunt (hopefully) better than we do.

[Anonymous]

I would use “Mrs.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Formally and traditionally, she is and always will be Mrs. John Smith - unless of course she marries again.

No, just no. Use her actual first name and whatever last name she used. Women are not their husbands’ property!

I'm not my husband's property, but I'm very happy to be Mrs. HIS FIRST NAME OUR LAST NAME

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Formally and traditionally, she is and always will be Mrs. John Smith - unless of course she marries again.

That is outdated.

For this, OP should address the card to [Aunt's First Name] [Aunt's Last Name]. If you must, use Mrs. [Aunt's First Name] [Aunt's Last Name].

When extending sympathy, a reminder of the person she just lost is a terrible practice. So calling her Mrs. [Uncle's First Name] [Uncle's Last Name] is just insensitive in this situation.

I disagree that it's outdated. What you've written suggests a divorced woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Formally and traditionally, she is and always will be Mrs. John Smith - unless of course she marries again.

+1 correct

[Anonymous]

If she is older and traditional I would definitely do Mrs. (his first and last name). To do Mrs. (her first and last name) is what you would do if she was divorced (according to my mother).

Ms. (her first and last name) is fine if you think she wouldn’t mind, or if you prefer it and don’t care what she thinks.

[Anonymous]

What name does she use? Use that.