Thoughts on the “other woman”?

[Anonymous]

I noticed with the Adam Levine controversy that the super feminist take among younger millennials and Gen Z is to victimize the “other woman” and make the husband the sole perpetrator, including situations where the husband is famous and known to be married with kids. The husband IS most responsible for cheating on his wife, I agree with that. He’s the one who made promises he broke. But do women really not owe anything to other women anymore? It’s totally fine to be a side chick now , even when it’s publicly known that the wife has little kids at home?

I feel like I’m taking crazy pills watching all these young women fall all over themselves to defend that TikToker who had the affair with Adam Levine. I don’t care what lies he fed her, she knew he was married and she was an adult when their affair started. It’s interesting to me that it’s considered “unfeminist” to call her out for being a homewrecker or to tell her t9 shut her legs to married men. Why can’t two things be true at once? Adam Levine is a trash husband and I hope his wife leaves with half his fortune. But knowingly sleeping with married men is trash behavior too.

[Anonymous]

You are right, of course.

The sin is equal on both sides.

[Anonymous]

People,of all ages but particularly the young, currently have this weird contractual view of relationships and see consent as the sole highest arbiter of whats right and wrong. Since the unmarried woman was under no contractual obligation to anyone nor to honor fidelity, she therefore did nothing wrong morally.

This is, of course, nonsense and obviously false, but consent morality is the dominant sentiment in society. “Vows” and “sexual restraint” are completely old fuddy duddy ideas gone the way of the dodo.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know about this situation but I feel like I am less likely to judge the other woman in cases of celebrity because there’s an imbalance of power there that makes me feel icky. Monica Lewinsky is an extreme example of course but I honestly can’t blame her at all so whether I would blame this TikToker would depend on more details of the situation than I know.

[Anonymous]

I think people are defending her because she’s so much younger than him. He’s 20 years older than her so she probably was naive enough to believe his lies that he was planning to leave his wife. She was manipulated and exploited just as much as the wife.

[Anonymous]

Don't see what all the fuss is about to be honest. The media should let Levine and his wife sort out their problems in peace.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are right, of course.

The sin is equal on both sides.

No it is not. One made a vow, one did not. That's not equal.

Also, in case you are unaware, married men lie to the other woman. They are told he is no longer in love, the wife is fine with him seeking sex elsewhere, they are in the process of separating, the divorce will be final soon, etc.

But the bottom line is, the cheater is the one who is married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People,of all ages but particularly the young, currently have this weird contractual view of relationships and see consent as the sole highest arbiter of whats right and wrong. Since the unmarried woman was under no contractual obligation to anyone nor to honor fidelity, she therefore did nothing wrong morally.

This is, of course, nonsense and obviously false, but consent morality is the dominant sentiment in society. “Vows” and “sexual restraint” are completely old fuddy duddy ideas gone the way of the dodo.

You are contradicting yourself. The other woman didn't take any vows. The married man did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are right, of course.

The sin is equal on both sides.

No it is not. One made a vow, one did not. That's not equal.

Also, in case you are unaware, married men lie to the other woman. They are told he is no longer in love, the wife is fine with him seeking sex elsewhere, they are in the process of separating, the divorce will be final soon, etc.

But the bottom line is, the cheater is the one who is married.

Only an idiot believes crap like that though.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think you can expect someone that chose not to be married to respect another marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't see what all the fuss is about to be honest. The media should let Levine and his wife sort out their problems in peace.

Totally agree. I mean, he's Adam Levine, voted sexiest man alive. Who is remotely surprised he isn't faithful. I would place my life fortune that all super attractive men cheat at least some of the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People,of all ages but particularly the young, currently have this weird contractual view of relationships and see consent as the sole highest arbiter of whats right and wrong. Since the unmarried woman was under no contractual obligation to anyone nor to honor fidelity, she therefore did nothing wrong morally.

This is, of course, nonsense and obviously false, but consent morality is the dominant sentiment in society. “Vows” and “sexual restraint” are completely old fuddy duddy ideas gone the way of the dodo.

You are contradicting yourself. The other woman didn't take any vows. The married man did.

But everyone knows married people take vows and they, the other spouse, and their children should be left alone out of respect for not just the individuals but the institution of marriage and family itself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are right, of course.

The sin is equal on both sides.

No it is not. One made a vow, one did not. That's not equal.

Also, in case you are unaware, married men lie to the other woman. They are told he is no longer in love, the wife is fine with him seeking sex elsewhere, they are in the process of separating, the divorce will be final soon, etc.

But the bottom line is, the cheater is the one who is married.

Nobody needs to vow to be a decent human.

If he feeds you lies say great give me a call when it’s less complicated.

But OW are damaged so they make horrible choices.

[Anonymous]

In the marriage, husband is to blame, but both equally for the affair. That woman knew exactly what she was doing and wanted her 5 minutes of fame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People,of all ages but particularly the young, currently have this weird contractual view of relationships and see consent as the sole highest arbiter of whats right and wrong. Since the unmarried woman was under no contractual obligation to anyone nor to honor fidelity, she therefore did nothing wrong morally.

This is, of course, nonsense and obviously false, but consent morality is the dominant sentiment in society. “Vows” and “sexual restraint” are completely old fuddy duddy ideas gone the way of the dodo.

You are contradicting yourself. The other woman didn't take any vows. The married man did.

But everyone knows married people take vows and they, the other spouse, and their children should be left alone out of respect for not just the individuals but the institution of marriage and family itself.

You don't have much of a marriage if you're counting on total strangers to keep it together for you. It's on you and your spouse to do that.