Finding the right nanny to grow with us

[Anonymous]

When you have just one newborn but you’re hoping to find one nanny who will stay with your family through more children and stages of development well into middle school, what traits do you focus on?

Obviously we need a nanny who drives and has a good driving record even though that won’t be needed for a year or so. We’d like a college educated nanny for the long term as well but also someone who will engage, narrate, sing, and “converse” with the babies.

What do you focus most on?

Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Are you in your “forever house”, OP? Finding a nanny who lives close definitely promotes longevity of employment. Long commutes force a lot of nannies to leave just because they’re worn down by the commute.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you in your “forever house”, OP? Finding a nanny who lives close definitely promotes longevity of employment. Long commutes force a lot of nannies to leave just because they’re worn down by the commute.

Excellent point! Thank you!!

[Anonymous]

You need someone who is young and active. You want them to stick through at least ages 12-13 for kids who aren't even born yet. So you need someone who can not only actively take the kids to the park and play with them in the yard and run with them in activities but will foreseeably be able to do that for another decade.

Someone in theirs 20s to 30s would be optimal.

[Anonymous]

You need to pay extremely well....

[Anonymous]

Are you ok paying someone FT once your kids are all in school? If you are a Nanny will likely stay . I was with my family for 9 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need someone who is young and active. You want them to stick through at least ages 12-13 for kids who aren't even born yet. So you need someone who can not only actively take the kids to the park and play with them in the yard and run with them in activities but will foreseeably be able to do that for another decade.

Someone in theirs 20s to 30s would be optimal.

Disagree. I would go with someone in their forties who has grown with a family before.

Our nanny is 67 and just finished a half marathon so age/youth not always equate with activity. She runs through the park after our 3.5 and 1.5 yr olds and has more energy than I do. The only drawback with our older nanny is that she may want to retire before we’re ready.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you ok paying someone FT once your kids are all in school? If you are a Nanny will likely stay . I was with my family for 9 years.

Yes. OP here. Yes we will pay well and yes we will continue to pay full time when the kids are all in school.

[Anonymous]

Getting a nanny with a college degree is a good start. Another suggestion would be a native English speaker or someone completely fluent in English. Reading and writing in English gets more and more important as the kids get older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need someone who is young and active. You want them to stick through at least ages 12-13 for kids who aren't even born yet. So you need someone who can not only actively take the kids to the park and play with them in the yard and run with them in activities but will foreseeably be able to do that for another decade.

Someone in theirs 20s to 30s would be optimal.

Disagree. I would go with someone in their forties who has grown with a family before.

Our nanny is 67 and just finished a half marathon so age/youth not always equate with activity. She runs through the park after our 3.5 and 1.5 yr olds and has more energy than I do. The only drawback with our older nanny is that she may want to retire before we’re ready.

Great - you're lucky. I know a 64-year-old nanny who won't walk down the driveway without complaining.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need someone who is young and active. You want them to stick through at least ages 12-13 for kids who aren't even born yet. So you need someone who can not only actively take the kids to the park and play with them in the yard and run with them in activities but will foreseeably be able to do that for another decade.

Someone in theirs 20s to 30s would be optimal.

Disagree. I would go with someone in their forties who has grown with a family before.

Our nanny is 67 and just finished a half marathon so age/youth not always equate with activity. She runs through the park after our 3.5 and 1.5 yr olds and has more energy than I do. The only drawback with our older nanny is that she may want to retire before we’re ready.

Great - you're lucky. I know a 64-year-old nanny who won't walk down the driveway without complaining.

I work with a 28 year old who can’t walk up a flight of stairs without complaining. My parents are 80 and 75 and took my kids skiing a few months ago.

It’s fitness and attitude, not age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need someone who is young and active. You want them to stick through at least ages 12-13 for kids who aren't even born yet. So you need someone who can not only actively take the kids to the park and play with them in the yard and run with them in activities but will foreseeably be able to do that for another decade.

Someone in theirs 20s to 30s would be optimal.

Disagree. I would go with someone in their forties who has grown with a family before.

Our nanny is 67 and just finished a half marathon so age/youth not always equate with activity. She runs through the park after our 3.5 and 1.5 yr olds and has more energy than I do. The only drawback with our older nanny is that she may want to retire before we’re ready.

Great - you're lucky. I know a 64-year-old nanny who won't walk down the driveway without complaining.

I work with a 28 year old who can’t walk up a flight of stairs without complaining. My parents are 80 and 75 and took my kids skiing a few months ago.

It’s fitness and attitude, not age.

You're really comparing your parents taking your kids for maybe 3 days to a 365-day commitment?

[Anonymous]

You need smart and savvy, OP. Someone open to learning as the kids grow. Someone with an adaptable nature.

All the really good candidates we interviewed we college educated, smart, English speakers but only one, we both agreed after the interview, was a self-starter and adaptable. She was also still very close to two of her previous families which told us she was good with older kids too even though her preference was to start with one newborn.

You have to follow your gut.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need someone who is young and active. You want them to stick through at least ages 12-13 for kids who aren't even born yet. So you need someone who can not only actively take the kids to the park and play with them in the yard and run with them in activities but will foreseeably be able to do that for another decade.

Someone in theirs 20s to 30s would be optimal.

Disagree. I would go with someone in their forties who has grown with a family before.

Our nanny is 67 and just finished a half marathon so age/youth not always equate with activity. She runs through the park after our 3.5 and 1.5 yr olds and has more energy than I do. The only drawback with our older nanny is that she may want to retire before we’re ready.

Great - you're lucky. I know a 64-year-old nanny who won't walk down the driveway without complaining.

I work with a 28 year old who can’t walk up a flight of stairs without complaining. My parents are 80 and 75 and took my kids skiing a few months ago.

It’s fitness and attitude, not age.

You're really comparing your parents taking your kids for maybe 3 days to a 365-day commitment?

Look, I’m not saying that an 80 year old would make the best nanny but fitness is everything. I would definitely look for a healthy nanny in her 40’s before I’d ever hire anyone younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need someone who is young and active. You want them to stick through at least ages 12-13 for kids who aren't even born yet. So you need someone who can not only actively take the kids to the park and play with them in the yard and run with them in activities but will foreseeably be able to do that for another decade.

Someone in theirs 20s to 30s would be optimal.

Disagree. I would go with someone in their forties who has grown with a family before.

Our nanny is 67 and just finished a half marathon so age/youth not always equate with activity. She runs through the park after our 3.5 and 1.5 yr olds and has more energy than I do. The only drawback with our older nanny is that she may want to retire before we’re ready.

Great - you're lucky. I know a 64-year-old nanny who won't walk down the driveway without complaining.

I work with a 28 year old who can’t walk up a flight of stairs without complaining. My parents are 80 and 75 and took my kids skiing a few months ago.

It’s fitness and attitude, not age.

+1. Our first nanny was 28 and constantly sick or injured. She didn’t last three months and we had to let her go. Our forever nanny (I hope) started with us when she was 58 (our oldest was six months) and she’s still going strong with a now nine year old and four year old.