Stop calling yourself blessed when what you are is privileged

[Anonymous]

I see blessed and privileged as words that can be used interchangeably. I'm not sure why this is triggering though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see blessed and privileged as words that can be used interchangeably. I'm not sure why this is triggering though.

Yeah, it is very interesting and sad to see how triggered some people (or at least one person) is by the word.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see blessed and privileged as words that can be used interchangeably. I'm not sure why this is triggering though.

Yeah, it is very interesting and sad to see how triggered some people (or at least one person) is by the word.

When someone insists that blessed is inappropriate and the term privileged should be used, I don’t think it’s being used interchangeably.

[Anonymous]

I like it best when Bunmi says it. #blessed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a religious person, I’m confident that I am correct to call myself “blessed” in the biblical sense because I have 3 healthy children, a stable and secure place to raise them, my own health, my husband’s health (both of which is required to travel), food on the table, wine to drink, etc. My husband works to provide and does not have a substance abuse problem, which is also a biblical blessing. I also work and use my income to invest, which is also a biblical blessing to him.

Do you know what “because” means?

I am saying that these are explicitly described as blessings in the Bible so that’s my basis for using the word. The biblical sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:when someone says they're blessed, to me, it's the same as saying they're lucky, which they might be.

It's not a personal affront, OP. Whether it's luck, privilege, hard work, or a blessing, it doesn't really matter, because the outcome is the same. Just be happy for them and for their acknowledgement that they have something in life to be grateful for.

DP here. I get what OP is saying. It's the tone deafness. What is implied when you say you are blessed because of your good fortune - that some divine being has smiled upon you, and even if you deny it, there is the logical implication that others who haven't had much good fortune in life are not blessed.

That's all.

No, your conclusion is not logical.

Saying that you've been blessed doesn't imply that others aren't blessed because they don't have exactly what you have, when you have it. If I say I am blessed to have a house, it doesn't imply that those without houses are not also blessed. There was a time when I didn't have a house either. I spent years saving for a home, then I spent a year looking for a house and put in offers on multiple homes and was outbid again and again, but I still considered myself blessed then in countless ways. Saying that you are blessed is more about a general state of grace and gratitude, not about having everything you want.

[Anonymous]

I don’t get people’s objective in pointing out privilege nonstop. Why? So you can prove that your misfortune is out of your hands and certain races were destined to not be blessed??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you have no understanding of what being Blessed means.

Can you explain it to me? As a parent whose child died after a long and painful illness, when someone tells me they are “blessed” with healthy children, I feel like they think God decides to give their kids the privilege of good health and decided differently for my kid.

As the wife of an Afghanistan veteran who is currently worrying about interpreter friends he left behind who are in fear of their lives, when people say they are blessed to be Americans do they mean God chose those different paths?

I am asking this as a Christian who hates the phrase.

DP. I am sorry for your loss. I have had two children die (as well as my husband) and it is hell. However, I was still blessed by their presences in my life even though their lives ended tragically.

You're lashing out and I think you would be better off taking a step back from social media and even news media for a while until you regain your footing. If you have done grief therapy or any type of therapy before but stopped then you should consider going back in to it.

Hugs.

DP. Leave the PP alone. She is not "lashing out" - she is asking very good questions. Sorry if they make you uncomfortable. And I'm sorry for your losses.

We'll have to agree to disagree. I see a lot of anger in her post and that, to me, says "lashing out." I don't lead groups any more but if I did she would be on my list to make sure we got her in asap.

I don't see anger. I see pain and that is a different thing from anger. Questioning the implications of a pat saying like "I am blessed because of X,Y,Z" is a very human reaction, and actually quite incisive.

I hate to say this because I know you have suffered a lot too, but your "she would be on my list to make sure we got her in asap" is really an obnoxious thing to say and suggests the hollowness of your professed empathy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get people’s objective in pointing out privilege nonstop. Why? So you can prove that your misfortune is out of your hands and certain races were destined to not be blessed??

No, so you can point out that some people have it easier in life than others, whether because of wealth or race or sex or the luck of the draw in what kind of bodies they ended up with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:when someone says they're blessed, to me, it's the same as saying they're lucky, which they might be.

It's not a personal affront, OP. Whether it's luck, privilege, hard work, or a blessing, it doesn't really matter, because the outcome is the same. Just be happy for them and for their acknowledgement that they have something in life to be grateful for.

DP here. I get what OP is saying. It's the tone deafness. What is implied when you say you are blessed because of your good fortune - that some divine being has smiled upon you, and even if you deny it, there is the logical implication that others who haven't had much good fortune in life are not blessed.

That's all.

No, your conclusion is not logical.

Saying that you've been blessed doesn't imply that others aren't blessed because they don't have exactly what you have, when you have it. If I say I am blessed to have a house, it doesn't imply that those without houses are not also blessed. There was a time when I didn't have a house either. I spent years saving for a home, then I spent a year looking for a house and put in offers on multiple homes and was outbid again and again, but I still considered myself blessed then in countless ways. Saying that you are blessed is more about a general state of grace and gratitude, not about having everything you want.

So if you are blessed because you have a house, what happens when you lose that house, have your lost your blessing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get people’s objective in pointing out privilege nonstop. Why? So you can prove that your misfortune is out of your hands and certain races were destined to not be blessed??

No, so you can point out that some people have it easier in life than others, whether because of wealth or race or sex or the luck of the draw in what kind of bodies they ended up with.

And why does that matter when someone is posting a sentiment of gratitude on social media?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a religious person, I’m confident that I am correct to call myself “blessed” in the biblical sense because I have 3 healthy children, a stable and secure place to raise them, my own health, my husband’s health (both of which is required to travel), food on the table, wine to drink, etc. My husband works to provide and does not have a substance abuse problem, which is also a biblical blessing. I also work and use my income to invest, which is also a biblical blessing to him.

Do you know what “because” means?

I am saying that these are explicitly described as blessings in the Bible so that’s my basis for using the word. The biblical sense.

Here is what the bible says about blessings:

Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the Earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be satisfied.
Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called children of God.
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.
Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get people’s objective in pointing out privilege nonstop. Why? So you can prove that your misfortune is out of your hands and certain races were destined to not be blessed??

No, so you can point out that some people have it easier in life than others, whether because of wealth or race or sex or the luck of the draw in what kind of bodies they ended up with.

And why does that matter when someone is posting a sentiment of gratitude on social media?

Why does it matter when someone points out privilege?

[Anonymous]

I think blessed means “I don’t deserve this” I don’t deserve any of the good things in my life. But I’m thankful for them and try to share (in many ways). But I try to be thankful in all circumstances. Even when I haven’t been able to pay my bills, didn’t own a house, or go on vacation.

[Anonymous]

I dont get the ding dongs that believe in god and think the Bible is a factual document.