Mom in trouble for leaving 4 year old with 14 year old sibling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

Whatever. We wonder why some kids don’t grow up to have any sense of responsibility and work ethic and it’s because their parents have spoiled them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

Whatever. We wonder why some kids don’t grow up to have any sense of responsibility and work ethic and it’s because their parents have spoiled them

What a backward statement. You obviously don't have kids. Spoiling comes from over coddling, not allowing independence. The 14yo daughter learned a valuable lesson, as did the 4yo boy, about consequences. The opposite of not learning responsibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

Whatever. We wonder why some kids don’t grow up to have any sense of responsibility and work ethic and it’s because their parents have spoiled them

What a backward statement. You obviously don't have kids. Spoiling comes from over coddling, not allowing independence. The 14yo daughter learned a valuable lesson, as did the 4yo boy, about consequences. The opposite of not learning responsibility.

What consequences? Mom went to jail not the 14-year-old. And CPS will probably be visiting quite soon as well. That's not a responsibility I'd want for my teen daughter but do you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

Whatever. We wonder why some kids don’t grow up to have any sense of responsibility and work ethic and it’s because their parents have spoiled them

What a backward statement. You obviously don't have kids. Spoiling comes from over coddling, not allowing independence. The 14yo daughter learned a valuable lesson, as did the 4yo boy, about consequences. The opposite of not learning responsibility.

What consequences? Mom went to jail not the 14-year-old. And CPS will probably be visiting quite soon as well. That's not a responsibility I'd want for my teen daughter but do you.

You can’t be serious. You think the kids didn't experience consequences? Sorry, I dont believe you really believe that. Credibility blown.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, DCUMland would surely clutch their pearls at my upbringing. I’m the youngest of four and the oldest was watching us by the time he was 11. Back then, “escaping” was just called going outside to play.

So why did your parents even bother to ask your 11 year old brother to watch you? If escaping and going outside to play are the same thing, they should have just left you outside with food on the counter/steps.

Your parents (along with mine and most people on this board) were careless. We know better now. Yes, the neighbor should not have called the police. However, the 14 year old should either keep an eye on the 4 year old or not babysit.

NP. And yet here we are.

We can say that about everything - smoking cigarettes, car seats, vaccines etc. Right?

That's a false equivalence. The other things you've listed were actual improvements, but hyper vigilant helicopter parenting isn't good for anyone. The unreasonable demand that everyone adopt this parenting style will result in the excessive policing of family life and a generation with fewer functional, independent adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

+1000 it literally grieves me to think this is the mentality of people today. It is GOOD for older siblings to be part of the family, learn responsibility! Kids aren’t royalty; they are people who have to learn to be self-sacrificial adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

And the result was often the younger siblings getting injured or even dying. Even in the 1950s-70s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

And the result was often the younger siblings getting injured or even dying. Even in the 1950s-70s.

And do you have the data for this?

[Anonymous]

I was a parentified tween and teen caring for my younger brother with severe ADHD. I was a bad experience for us both. He resented me for telling him what he could or couldn’t do. I resented him for the stress it caused trying to keep him alive and for the distraction from my school work. We have no relationship today as adults although I am close with other siblings that I was not assigned to watch. I never asked my older child watch the younger one for more than a couple minutes like if I needed to carry several loads of shopping from the car into the house late at night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

+1000 it literally grieves me to think this is the mentality of people today. It is GOOD for older siblings to be part of the family, learn responsibility! Kids aren’t royalty; they are people who have to learn to be self-sacrificial adults.

What about your last born? How is s/he learning to be “self-sacrificial”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was a parentified tween and teen caring for my younger brother with severe ADHD. I was a bad experience for us both. He resented me for telling him what he could or couldn’t do. I resented him for the stress it caused trying to keep him alive and for the distraction from my school work. We have no relationship today as adults although I am close with other siblings that I was not assigned to watch. I never asked my older child watch the younger one for more than a couple minutes like if I needed to carry several loads of shopping from the car into the house late at night.

Narcissistic parents don’t care. What’s good for them is labeled “good”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

+1000 it literally grieves me to think this is the mentality of people today. It is GOOD for older siblings to be part of the family, learn responsibility! Kids aren’t royalty; they are people who have to learn to be self-sacrificial adults.

Exactly. Taking care of family (younger and elderly) is how kids develop their abilities to be responsible. Making kids responsible for nothing but their own homework is a recipe for a self centered adult. I was babysitting as an 11 year old. A 14 year old is well old enough to take care of a 4 yr old sibling

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

+1000 it literally grieves me to think this is the mentality of people today. It is GOOD for older siblings to be part of the family, learn responsibility! Kids aren’t royalty; they are people who have to learn to be self-sacrificial adults.

What about your last born? How is s/he learning to be “self-sacrificial”?

I'm not the pp you quoted, but in my family the youngest would take care of younger cousins or nieces and nephews.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.11alive.com/article/news/local/single-mother-wants-charge-dropped-after-toddler-wanders-into-neighbors-house/85-fbbd3259-d39c-4886-8ddf-c391d3670bd5

This is almost unbelievable. What a crappy neighbor! There have been threads where people ask what age it is okay to have a sibling watch younger siblings. Most everyone would agree that it would be fine to have a 14 almost 15 year old watch their younger siblings.

Unless paid regular sitter rates, older children should never be asked to watch younger sibling.

+1

What? No way. Older kids have taken care of younger kids since families began. Particularly if mom is a single mom trying to make a living.

And the result was often the younger siblings getting injured or even dying. Even in the 1950s-70s.

Kids get injured and die under their own parents watch as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a parentified tween and teen caring for my younger brother with severe ADHD. I was a bad experience for us both. He resented me for telling him what he could or couldn’t do. I resented him for the stress it caused trying to keep him alive and for the distraction from my school work. We have no relationship today as adults although I am close with other siblings that I was not assigned to watch. I never asked my older child watch the younger one for more than a couple minutes like if I needed to carry several loads of shopping from the car into the house late at night.

Narcissistic parents don’t care. What’s good for them is labeled “good”.

My dad was narcissistic, but I think my mom was just trying to survive. She was working or seriously physically ill most of those years. Still it had really bad consequences for me at the time and for the lost sibling relationship all of these years. This set up is more harmful than people realize. Just because it has been done for centuries doesn’t mean it is healthy. We used to marry teen girls off to grown men as well.