My kids steal food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi this is op. I haven’t read all the comments yet but I want to clear up a few things. My kids are allowed snacks whenever they want. They are allowed to put certain items on the list whenever they want. My daughter has gained forty pounds in a year so this is not me freaking out because she gained a tiny bit of weight.

When I say stealing food I mean they have been specifically asked not to eat these because they are for dinner or belong to someone else. Like, you ate your ice cream you can’t have dads that he is saving.

I think my daughter is having issues with adhd and compulsive eating and maybe her current therapist isn’t on top of that so we’re going to assess and I thank everyone who chimes in to say to pursue it through a professional.

And to the person who said that it’s bad my 9 yo is in therapy...f&@k you. There have been a lot of big changes in everybody’s life this year. I started my daughter in therapy because I saw her getting anxious and depressed. I think it’s one of the best things I did as a parent and I don’t appreciate you trying to make me and other who read this feel bad or ashamed because we use mental health services thoughtfully.

dp Why do op say this? When I start a thread and get a comment I read every comment. I don't think I am the only one!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A waitress in FL just rescued a child from his stepfather and bio mother who were abusing him. One of the main changes is denying his food.
Are you that mother, op? Are you in jail right now?

That’s so nasty. she’s here trying to help her child.

dp Please end this phrase. it is so cringe inducing. Along with "thriving" Nasty is eating poop.

DP. I think this is the best and most appropriate use of the word nasty that I have seen in a long time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A waitress in FL just rescued a child from his stepfather and bio mother who were abusing him. One of the main changes is denying his food.
Are you that mother, op? Are you in jail right now?

That’s so nasty. she’s here trying to help her child.

dp Please end this phrase. it is so cringe inducing. Along with "thriving" Nasty is eating poop.

DP. I think this is the best and most appropriate use of the word nasty that I have seen in a long time.

My example or the pp's?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A waitress in FL just rescued a child from his stepfather and bio mother who were abusing him. One of the main changes is denying his food.
Are you that mother, op? Are you in jail right now?

That’s so nasty. she’s here trying to help her child.

dp Please end this phrase. it is so cringe inducing. Along with "thriving" Nasty is eating poop.

DP. I think this is the best and most appropriate use of the word nasty that I have seen in a long time.

My example or the pp's?

The pp saying that it is nasty to compare OP to some kind of abusive criminal mother. Really mean, nasty, vicious comment. People come onto these threads and rip at people like it is a sport.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A waitress in FL just rescued a child from his stepfather and bio mother who were abusing him. One of the main changes is denying his food.
Are you that mother, op? Are you in jail right now?

That’s so nasty. she’s here trying to help her child.

dp Please end this phrase. it is so cringe inducing. Along with "thriving" Nasty is eating poop.

DP. I think this is the best and most appropriate use of the word nasty that I have seen in a long time.

My example or the pp's?

The pp saying that it is nasty to compare OP to some kind of abusive criminal mother. Really mean, nasty, vicious comment. People come onto these threads and rip at people like it is a sport.

I think eating poop is nastier. Op can ignore. It is only their opinion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical day: breakfast burritos and fruit. Chicken nuggets, string cheese, apples and ketchup for lunch. Chili with ground beef and rice and a veggie for dinner. Snacks about 11 and 2 and 4. Snacks might include: pepperoni, fruit leather, yogurt, carrots, bell peppers, cheese and crackers, popcorn, plus a serving of whatever we baked that day. We go for hot chocolate at Starbucks once or twice a week. We do dessert of fruit and cool whip or a serving of ice cream.

The additional food is on top of all that.

Those aren't the healthiest meals, IMO. Also, you don't need two desserts a day (baked treat plus dessert) - that's probably 500 calories right there. Try exchanging those for more protein and make sure every snack has protein too (carrots and hummus, apple and peanut butter)

Here are my kids' meals today:

Breakfast - omelets with cheese, mushrooms, and turkey bacon (This is what we had, it's not for health reasons, sometimes we have regular bacon)
Lunch - ham and cheese sandwich with cherry tomatoes on the side. They were still hungry, so they each had a mandarin orange.
Dinner - chicken souvlaki with couscous and tzatziki sauce

This is the diet of a peri menapausal woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi this is op. I haven’t read all the comments yet but I want to clear up a few things. My kids are allowed snacks whenever they want. They are allowed to put certain items on the list whenever they want. My daughter has gained forty pounds in a year so this is not me freaking out because she gained a tiny bit of weight.

When I say stealing food I mean they have been specifically asked not to eat these because they are for dinner or belong to someone else. Like, you ate your ice cream you can’t have dads that he is saving.

I think my daughter is having issues with adhd and compulsive eating and maybe her current therapist isn’t on top of that so we’re going to assess and I thank everyone who chimes in to say to pursue it through a professional.

And to the person who said that it’s bad my 9 yo is in therapy...f&@k you. There have been a lot of big changes in everybody’s life this year. I started my daughter in therapy because I saw her getting anxious and depressed. I think it’s one of the best things I did as a parent and I don’t appreciate you trying to make me and other who read this feel bad or ashamed because we use mental health services thoughtfully.

OP-- I replied earlier with some suggestions, but did not see that you mentioned your DD has ADHD. Impulsivity around food is pretty common for ADHD. My DS has ADHD and as soon as his meds wear off, he's in the pantry grabbing whatever he can. Without medication, we couldn't keep a lot of treats in the house-- even if they specifically belonged to one of us (i.e. "mom's chocolate bar that she was looking forward to), he would impulsively eat it if he discovered it.
DL learning (and I mentioned this in my comment) add another layer-- kids are unhappy, bored, isolated, disengaged from learning....etc. I have two suggestions -- 1) move your post to special needs and 2) you need some kind of replacement behavior. ADHD doesn't respond to "no" because it's a condition of impulsivity/self regulation. Exercise, hobbies, etc. something to get the dopamine up will increase both happiness and self regulation. If your DD isn't on medication, you may consider exploring that if you haven't already.

[Anonymous]

OP, I’ll be honest, based on your “update” - if you are concerned, why are you not bringing this up with your child’s therapist, and if there is that much upheaval in your entire lives, then perhaps you also need to seek out a family therapist. Unfortunately, crowdsourcing and hive mind can’t help you fix your family. Something is going on in your home, and the “stealing” is a symptom, not the actual problem. The fact that it’s both your children makes me wonder what else is going on - is it sexual abuse? Substance abuse? Gambling? Domestic violence?

You’re right to wonder about it, but again - the issue isn’t the food, and locking it up isn’t the solution. These children are probably locking something up and food is the key to some kind of release.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical day: breakfast burritos and fruit. Chicken nuggets, string cheese, apples and ketchup for lunch. Chili with ground beef and rice and a veggie for dinner. Snacks about 11 and 2 and 4. Snacks might include: pepperoni, fruit leather, yogurt, carrots, bell peppers, cheese and crackers, popcorn, plus a serving of whatever we baked that day. We go for hot chocolate at Starbucks once or twice a week. We do dessert of fruit and cool whip or a serving of ice cream.

The additional food is on top of all that.

You are simply not feeding your kids proper meals and enough food. I read your menu like some kind of soup and fast food advert.
I recommend you try something like this:
Breakfast: eggs, bacon, pancakes, yogurt.
Lunch: Ribs with potatoes, soup, and salad.
Dinner: rice and meat and veggies, as in a ton of it. For example, teriyaki chicken with rice and veggies. Juice, milk, etc.. to each meal.

Stop with soup and stew-like meals. In my country, these are starters. My grandma would look at your chicken nuggets and ketchup and ask you where is the meal. You don't have a proper carb side dish for lunch. For dinner, you have a stew. Not a single kid grandma fed was overweight. ANd she gave us a snack of bread with home rendered lard and paprika on top!

Okay, I think OP needs to talk to a professional and needs to feed her kids more, but your suggestions are also lunacy. Who the hell serves pancakes AND bacon AND eggs AND yogurt for a regular weekday breakfast? Not only is that a ton of food, it's a ton of time!

Ribs for lunch? Absurd.

FWIW, in my country, lunch is always soup. There's a whole saying about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I’ll be honest, based on your “update” - if you are concerned, why are you not bringing this up with your child’s therapist, and if there is that much upheaval in your entire lives, then perhaps you also need to seek out a family therapist. Unfortunately, crowdsourcing and hive mind can’t help you fix your family. Something is going on in your home, and the “stealing” is a symptom, not the actual problem. The fact that it’s both your children makes me wonder what else is going on - is it sexual abuse? Substance abuse? Gambling? Domestic violence?

You’re right to wonder about it, but again - the issue isn’t the food, and locking it up isn’t the solution. These children are probably locking something up and food is the key to some kind of release.

Food is the key to some kind of release...

If you could figure out the solution to that we would have a lot less obese adults too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I’ll be honest, based on your “update” - if you are concerned, why are you not bringing this up with your child’s therapist, and if there is that much upheaval in your entire lives, then perhaps you also need to seek out a family therapist. Unfortunately, crowdsourcing and hive mind can’t help you fix your family. Something is going on in your home, and the “stealing” is a symptom, not the actual problem. The fact that it’s both your children makes me wonder what else is going on - is it sexual abuse? Substance abuse? Gambling? Domestic violence?

You’re right to wonder about it, but again - the issue isn’t the food, and locking it up isn’t the solution. These children are probably locking something up and food is the key to some kind of release.

Food is the key to some kind of release...

If you could figure out the solution to that we would have a lot less obese adults too.

,

Yes, probably, as well as the root to much substance abuse like alcoholism. But people want to point to “willpower” and the like, instead of realizing that Many of these behaviours are a mechanism of self medication. You can’t just diet or stop drinking and land yourself out of loneliness, hopelessness, poverty, depression. Stopping can help, but it’s not the solution.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical day: breakfast burritos and fruit. Chicken nuggets, string cheese, apples and ketchup for lunch. Chili with ground beef and rice and a veggie for dinner. Snacks about 11 and 2 and 4. Snacks might include: pepperoni, fruit leather, yogurt, carrots, bell peppers, cheese and crackers, popcorn, plus a serving of whatever we baked that day. We go for hot chocolate at Starbucks once or twice a week. We do dessert of fruit and cool whip or a serving of ice cream.

The additional food is on top of all that.

Those aren't the healthiest meals, IMO. Also, you don't need two desserts a day (baked treat plus dessert) - that's probably 500 calories right there. Try exchanging those for more protein and make sure every snack has protein too (carrots and hummus, apple and peanut butter)

Here are my kids' meals today:

Breakfast - omelets with cheese, mushrooms, and turkey bacon (This is what we had, it's not for health reasons, sometimes we have regular bacon)
Lunch - ham and cheese sandwich with cherry tomatoes on the side. They were still hungry, so they each had a mandarin orange.
Dinner - chicken souvlaki with couscous and tzatziki sauce

This is the diet of a peri menopausal woman.

I have to agree with you! Appalling! I ate more as a 2-year-old. How do I know? I know because mom told me, she was pregnant and we were on vacation, full board in a hotel. I would eat my kids' meals, then eat most of hers as she had moring sickness(pregnant with my sister) and I would want more! I was a chubby toddler, but I was a skinny teen and I am a relativelyslim/normal weight adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical day: breakfast burritos and fruit. Chicken nuggets, string cheese, apples and ketchup for lunch. Chili with ground beef and rice and a veggie for dinner. Snacks about 11 and 2 and 4. Snacks might include: pepperoni, fruit leather, yogurt, carrots, bell peppers, cheese and crackers, popcorn, plus a serving of whatever we baked that day. We go for hot chocolate at Starbucks once or twice a week. We do dessert of fruit and cool whip or a serving of ice cream.

The additional food is on top of all that.

You are simply not feeding your kids proper meals and enough food. I read your menu like some kind of soup and fast food advert.
I recommend you try something like this:
Breakfast: eggs, bacon, pancakes, yogurt.
Lunch: Ribs with potatoes, soup, and salad.
Dinner: rice and meat and veggies, as in a ton of it. For example, teriyaki chicken with rice and veggies. Juice, milk, etc.. to each meal.

Stop with soup and stew-like meals. In my country, these are starters. My grandma would look at your chicken nuggets and ketchup and ask you where is the meal. You don't have a proper carb side dish for lunch. For dinner, you have a stew. Not a single kid grandma fed was overweight. ANd she gave us a snack of bread with home rendered lard and paprika on top!

Okay, I think OP needs to talk to a professional and needs to feed her kids more, but your suggestions are also lunacy. Who the hell serves pancakes AND bacon AND eggs AND yogurt for a regular weekday breakfast? Not only is that a ton of food, it's a ton of time!

Ribs for lunch? Absurd.

FWIW, in my country, lunch is always soup. There's a whole saying about it.

You are clearly one of the disordered food people. I serve bacon and eggs and all that and ribs to my kids. They are likely slimmer than any of you or your kids. The problem some people have is that they think food is bad. Nobody cares what is lunch in your country, maybe you are Vietnamese and eat pho? Loads of calories, meat and carbs in that kind of soup.

[Anonymous]

This thread is insane. Op sounds like she is feeding her kids too much but not enough. The meals don’t sound satisfying and they’re snacking on empty calories all day long. Feed your children and they won’t be so hungry. Also op sounds totally unhinged, literally locking up ice cream and accusing her children of stealing food in their own home.

[Anonymous]

My niece became of overweight around 6. By 10 she was obese.
Mom and dad were at wit's end about how that happened, they did nothing to cause it.
Apart from divorcing, mom starting to drink and pass out, and handing kids money to buy fast food.
To this day, SIL refuses to acknowledge that the divorce and other things contributed to it.
On top of it, dad decided to handle the situation by barking at his child and handing her out protein bars!!!