My kids steal food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical day: breakfast burritos and fruit. Chicken nuggets, string cheese, apples and ketchup for lunch. Chili with ground beef and rice and a veggie for dinner. Snacks about 11 and 2 and 4. Snacks might include: pepperoni, fruit leather, yogurt, carrots, bell peppers, cheese and crackers, popcorn, plus a serving of whatever we baked that day. We go for hot chocolate at Starbucks once or twice a week. We do dessert of fruit and cool whip or a serving of ice cream.

The additional food is on top of all that.

Those aren't the healthiest meals, IMO. Also, you don't need two desserts a day (baked treat plus dessert) - that's probably 500 calories right there. Try exchanging those for more protein and make sure every snack has protein too (carrots and hummus, apple and peanut butter)

Here are my kids' meals today:

Breakfast - omelets with cheese, mushrooms, and turkey bacon (This is what we had, it's not for health reasons, sometimes we have regular bacon)
Lunch - ham and cheese sandwich with cherry tomatoes on the side. They were still hungry, so they each had a mandarin orange.
Dinner - chicken souvlaki with couscous and tzatziki sauce

This is the diet of a peri menapausal woman.

That is the comment of a mom who only feeds her children dino nuggets and mac and cheese.

No doubt this comment is by the pp who accuses others of having an eating disorder while he shops only perimeter of the grocery store and feeds hummus to her kids! Yet, she thinks she has no eating disorder!

Do you have something against middle eastern food? First you shame me for feeding my children couscous, now you think hummus is bad for children? WTF???

Hummus is great for kids, in addition to meat, pasta, veggies, never as a meal.

No one is suggesting hummus as a meal, calm down.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:#1: Stop buying any food that is not healthy. When you guys want treats, buy single servings or make it as a family. Ice cream, crackers, lunch meats don't make the cut. Stick with fresh fruits and vegetables, raw meats, whole grains, etc.

#2: Don't make extra food for meals so there aren't leftovers.

#3: Get into the habit of doing physical exercise as a family--not to lose weight but to emphasize what a healthy lifestyle looks like. Tell the children that being healthy is a three-legged stool of Sleep, Exercise, and healthy Eating.

Can you work near the kitchen so you can monitor a bit better? My kid was not in the kitchen alone so this never came up.

I’m seriously curious. Do you work? What do you eat for lunch every day?

I am not the pp, but I basically eat the way they’re describing. I work, also. It’s really not that hard with some preparation. Make a whole chicken, eat the meat as leftovers for the next few lunches. Roast several different veggie sides at the same time, eat them for the next few days. Keep lettuce and various salad fixings on hand so you can throw together a salad and warm up some leftover chicken and throw it on top. Make a big batch of homemade veggie sauce and gluten-free pasta. Freeze some of the sauce. It is really not that hard.

I am going to go and bet my savings that this is not how regular middle-class Americans, nor any country people cook and eat! People hold on hand meat, rice, potatoes, noodles. Some veggies, unless you are a vegetarian or a vegan. One chicken doesn't last few next lunches! Not in a regular family of four, where kids are not 1 and 6 months old! Keep lettuce to fill the appetite of 9-year-olds? Gluten-free pasta? Why? Freeze the sauce? Normal families with normal eating family members, finish regular gluten pasta with meat sauce in one meal,, meal and a half. Any leftovers are the next day's lunch, and then you need a new dinner.
Several roasted veggies, let's say with the roasted chicken, hence all in one, do not last a few days! They are normally gone in one day. And that is with making pretty good portions. Please refrain from giving advice to people about eating and food when you clearly have a severe eating disorder!
Have lettuce on hand, so you can make a salad, my something! Only in WASP dcum insanity! Do you know what any normal person in any normal country that has normal growing kids would ask you if you served them a salad? Is this an appetizer!

lol so much to unpack here. First of all, there are three of us, not the “regular” 4. Second of all, someone in our house has gluten intolerance but I also tend to think something like chick pea pasta has more nutritional value than regular wheat pasta. I’m also talking about making big batches of things- so for sauce, for example, think more along the lines of a giant pot on the stove filled with a base of canned tomatoes and then tons and tons of sautéed veggies. Like enough sauce that half of it is left over after covering a whole box of penne pasta.

Also, please expand your understanding of salad. I’m not talking about a sad bowl of ice berg lettuce, think more along the lines of arugula with roasted sweet potato, goat cheese, avocado, topped with chicken.

We do keep some snacks, mainly crackers and fruit and we do dessert several times a week. There is a wide spectrum between kids snacking all day on junk food and depriving children of food.

Trust me, my family is well fed and happy. How were you raised that a whole family eating a healthy diet sounds so strange for you?

No thanks, I will not expand my understanding of the salad. I grew up eating the Med diet and it served me right! I know healthy eating when I see healthy eating! Yours is not! I also grew up knowing that growing kids need protein and greens and carbs. I eat broth-like soups as a starter, as does most of the world. Perhaps you need to rethink your eating habits? I have yet to meet a person that talks about salad of any sort as a proper meal for kids.

Where in my post did I say I limit my childs carb intake??? I serve pasta, roasted potatoes (and other root veg), and rice. A pretty typical dinner for my entire household is a portion of protein (chicken, a burger, fish) a veggie, and some sort of carb, with dessert a few times a week. I was simply suggesting that it's not as hard to make and keep on hand healthy food as people are making it out to be if you batch cook. I'm not suggesting roasting veggies with chicken as a sheet pan meal, I am describing roasting up multiple baking sheets of different vegetables in one go (I actually used to sometimes do this before work pre-pandemic) and then having them on hand for the next three days or so to make life easier.

There is no need to feed your children prepackaged junk when it's so easy to serve fruit and yogurt or chips and hummus as a snack. And again, why the salad hate? I fail to see how a big salad topped with a serving of protein and other fixings is not a meal.

Serious question, do you have an eating disorder? That is the only reason I can see that what I am describing (a diet full of whole foods, mainly shopped from the perimeter of the grocery store, with some indulgences) sounds unhealthy to you.

NP. I don't disagree with some of your points, but chips are prepackaged junk. That doesn't mean I don't let my children have them, because I do. It just means I'm not sanctimonious about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh also, to the one obsessed pp who doesn’t like hummus or salad and eats an all meat and carb diet, there are several of us who have posted about healthy meals. You are out numbered and, quite frankly, sound very sad.

You need to shut up. You are disordered and insane. On top of it, I am 116lbs, the heaviest I've ever been!

116 pounds? No. Probably more like 116 kgs. Go eat a plate of ribs and think about why you think a healthy diet is “disordered”.

DP, but why do you think it’s impossible to eat that much and weigh less? I weigh ~110, same height as PP, same “diet” — always a lot of veggies and fruit, but also ribs and pasta if that’s what’s for dinner. I don’t work out, just basic activity like playing with kids and walking. It’s just my genes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh also, to the one obsessed pp who doesn’t like hummus or salad and eats an all meat and carb diet, there are several of us who have posted about healthy meals. You are out numbered and, quite frankly, sound very sad.

You need to shut up. You are disordered and insane. On top of it, I am 116lbs, the heaviest I've ever been!

116 pounds? No. Probably more like 116 kgs. Go eat a plate of ribs and think about why you think a healthy diet is “disordered”.

DP, but why do you think it’s impossible to eat that much and weigh less? I weigh ~110, same height as PP, same “diet” — always a lot of veggies and fruit, but also ribs and pasta if that’s what’s for dinner. I don’t work out, just basic activity like playing with kids and walking. It’s just my genes.

DP. Because that poster is totally nuts and wildly controlling. The 116-lb ribs PP has what sounds like a healthy, sane relationship with food (and lucky genetics), and that makes the other PP furious with rage. Her insistence that the PP is lying about her weight obviously shows a deep and significant eating disorder, and she should be pitied.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it interesting that Ellen Satter, whose books I see recommenced in this thread and a lot of other threads about kids and how to teach healthy eating/habits, is obese herself.

What, really??? Kind of destroys her credibility...

Give me a break. How does that destroy her credibility? Her books aren’t about dieting to be thin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh also, to the one obsessed pp who doesn’t like hummus or salad and eats an all meat and carb diet, there are several of us who have posted about healthy meals. You are out numbered and, quite frankly, sound very sad.

You need to shut up. You are disordered and insane. On top of it, I am 116lbs, the heaviest I've ever been!

116 pounds? No. Probably more like 116 kgs. Go eat a plate of ribs and think about why you think a healthy diet is “disordered”.

DP, but why do you think it’s impossible to eat that much and weigh less? I weigh ~110, same height as PP, same “diet” — always a lot of veggies and fruit, but also ribs and pasta if that’s what’s for dinner. I don’t work out, just basic activity like playing with kids and walking. It’s just my genes.

DP. Because that poster is totally nuts and wildly controlling. The 116-lb ribs PP has what sounds like a healthy, sane relationship with food (and lucky genetics), and that makes the other PP furious with rage. Her insistence that the PP is lying about her weight obviously shows a deep and significant eating disorder, and she should be pitied.

Lol. The supposed 116 poster only eats meat, rice, and pasta and thinks the idea of eating a salad is crazy. Highly unlikely she weighs 116 pounds. Especially after attacking the idea of eating a lot of veggies and primarily shopping around the perimeter of the grocery store.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here is a simple fact op. You caused your children's weight problems. You and DH buy their food. Yes, you are acting as they are "stealing" food. You are the blame for your dd being overweight.
You are buying her food. You are punishing children for eating food. You are asking for advice on how to control your kid's eating some more as if you didn't cause enough disordered eating.
Quire frankly, I am appalled that you are not asking the one and only question you should be asking. What do YOU need to do to help your kid and to correct your mistake?

You can become overweight eating too much of anything. It isn't just from eating "junk"

This is categorically false. Please stop saying things that you clearly don't understand.

[Anonymous]

Hummus is a FANTASTIC food for kids, just don't buy the stuff with preservatives. Chickpeas are a good source of protein, olive oil is very healthy, and sesame (tahini) also has iron. Kids need high (good) fat in their meals. My toddler's pediatrician said to make sure she's getting at least 20% fat in her diet.

As for people piling up on OP: some kids will just be overweight, due to their genetic makeup. Yes, that means you need to work harder to keep them active and eating to ensure proper nutrition. But it doesn't mean it's all OP's fault (which is DCUM's default position on every thread).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son stole food too. He was about ten and we had a friend renting a room with us while she went to a nearby college. She came to me and said someone was taking her potato chips out of her cabinet, the one we had given her to use for her own food. I knew immediately it was my son because his little sister was too short to reach it. Also, he has had a huge appetite since he was an infant. When confronted he confessed. He stopped doing it. But, once he was old enough to go to a store by himself he would buy himself the treats he wanted and there was no stopping him. I guess we could have forbid him from entering stores but he actually walked by places like Dunkin Donuts and 7-11 on his way to and from school. We could have prevented him from earning his own money but he was very industrious and motivated. Bought his own cool bike with money he earned, bought his own first car with money he saved.

He's an adult now. He has struggled with his weight all his life. When he is able to be physically active he does better. He struggles with appetite self-control. It's part of who he is. When he was a healthy weight (200 lbs at 6 ft) he felt great, but he hasn't been able to sustain it for more than a few years. Then his desire for the food he loves wins again.

Maybe there's something we could have done differently when he was a child but I don't know what it is. We did the best we could with him, considering his natural personality and appetites. I guess my bottom line at this point is he is a wonderful guy and I love him more than I can even say.

Good luck OP.

Some of the best people I know are overweight and love food. I don't know what the connection is, but they're really empathetic, understanding individuals, and very competent professionals - a somewhat rare combination. I doubt there was anything you did, in fact, by not making a huge issue out of it, you probably simply didn't amplify the problem. As for exercise, I recommend swimming, it's fun as long as getting to a pool is not too much of a chore. -NP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What age do you allow free access to food? My kids are toddlers and aren’t there yet. We always have nuts and fruits accessible but they’d raid my pantry if allowed and wouldn’t eat dinner.

We have set meal and snack times. We do reasonable portions at both. If a child is still hungry, they can always ask at the end of the meal for more, but more will be in 10-20 minutes, in case their stomach needed time to catch up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here is a simple fact op. You caused your children's weight problems. You and DH buy their food. Yes, you are acting as they are "stealing" food. You are the blame for your dd being overweight.
You are buying her food. You are punishing children for eating food. You are asking for advice on how to control your kid's eating some more as if you didn't cause enough disordered eating.
Quire frankly, I am appalled that you are not asking the one and only question you should be asking. What do YOU need to do to help your kid and to correct your mistake?

You can become overweight eating too much of anything. It isn't just from eating "junk"

This is categorically false. Please stop saying things that you clearly don't understand.

It’s true.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you need to accept that the current system you set up is not working. Maybe work with your daughter's therapist to try a new approach. I was raised in a very food-restricted home and would "steal" and hide food (and as is fairly common with those dynamics, developed an eating disorder as a teen). My kid has free access to any food in our home and it works great for us.

It may work great for you, but what is the answer when you’ve been doing this and one child starts becoming overweight?

It’s difficult to eat so much nutrient dense food like fruits and veggies that it’s unhealthy.

It is also near impossible to only keep fruits and vegetables in your house. That isn't a helpful suggestion.

Nope, it’s not.

Bags of dry beans, brown rice, quinoa, popcorn, etc
Cans of diced tomatoes, tomato paste
Small packages of nuts and seeds
Small containers of fruits and vegetables we dehydrated
Fruit on the counter with winter squash
Herbs grow in jars on the window sill
Onions in a paper bag in one cabinet
Apples on newspaper in another cabinet
Potatoes in another cabinet
Sweet potatoes in a fourth cabinet
Fifth cabinet has spices, oils, etc.
Veggies and fruit in the fridge
Raw meat in the fridge
Dairy in the fridge
vegetables, fruit and raw meat in the freezer

And done, no more issues.

Get a blender. Using cow or non-dairy milk, an overripe banana and a little frozen fruit, there’s a sweet smoothie.

Sautéed carrots are sweet. Sweet potatoes can be sweet. Fruit is sweet.

Make your own crackers from flaxseed, whole wheat flour and sunflower seeds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Typical day: breakfast burritos and fruit. Chicken nuggets, string cheese, apples and ketchup for lunch. Chili with ground beef and rice and a veggie for dinner. Snacks about 11 and 2 and 4. Snacks might include: pepperoni, fruit leather, yogurt, carrots, bell peppers, cheese and crackers, popcorn, plus a serving of whatever we baked that day. We go for hot chocolate at Starbucks once or twice a week. We do dessert of fruit and cool whip or a serving of ice cream.

The additional food is on top of all that.

I don’t see many vegetables, which are nutritious and filling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical day: breakfast burritos and fruit. Chicken nuggets, string cheese, apples and ketchup for lunch. Chili with ground beef and rice and a veggie for dinner. Snacks about 11 and 2 and 4. Snacks might include: pepperoni, fruit leather, yogurt, carrots, bell peppers, cheese and crackers, popcorn, plus a serving of whatever we baked that day. We go for hot chocolate at Starbucks once or twice a week. We do dessert of fruit and cool whip or a serving of ice cream.

The additional food is on top of all that.

You are simply not feeding your kids proper meals and enough food. I read your menu like some kind of soup and fast food advert.
I recommend you try something like this:
Breakfast: eggs, bacon, pancakes, yogurt.
Lunch: Ribs with potatoes, soup, and salad.
Dinner: rice and meat and veggies, as in a ton of it. For example, teriyaki chicken with rice and veggies. Juice, milk, etc.. to each meal.

Stop with soup and stew-like meals. In my country, these are starters. My grandma would look at your chicken nuggets and ketchup and ask you where is the meal. You don't have a proper carb side dish for lunch. For dinner, you have a stew. Not a single kid grandma fed was overweight. ANd she gave us a snack of bread with home rendered lard and paprika on top!

Okay, I think OP needs to talk to a professional and needs to feed her kids more, but your suggestions are also lunacy. Who the hell serves pancakes AND bacon AND eggs AND yogurt for a regular weekday breakfast? Not only is that a ton of food, it's a ton of time!

Ribs for lunch? Absurd.

FWIW, in my country, lunch is always soup. There's a whole saying about it.

Caucasian American, European roots are 150-250 years ago.

I manage to cook eggs (with sautéed minced veggies mixed in!), turkey bacon and high protein pancakes (from scratch, made with eggs, milk, bananas, and a combination of almond and regular flour) and and cut and wash fruit. It takes 30 minutes from start to finish. I’m homeschooling three kids, two of whom need high protein breakfasts, or they’re grumpy, hungry and can’t focus 30-45 minutes into school, and that’s with a planned snack time at the 2 hour mark. The third child can eat a half bowl of Cheerios or rice crispies (with milk), leave some, and be fine until lunch; that child eats a few bites of everything I make because it’s tastier.

There’s no reason to think that you can’t take 30 minutes to cook a decent breakfast. The kids get dressed, set the table, and then have a few minutes to play before breakfast. Then they have 30 minutes to eat, rinse their dishes, and brush their teeth. The same schedule works with DL, and you only need to move it forward by however long the drive to school is if you need to accommodate that. Just get up 30 minutes before the kids start getting around, then you have time for yourself first. It’s not hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:#1: Stop buying any food that is not healthy. When you guys want treats, buy single servings or make it as a family. Ice cream, crackers, lunch meats don't make the cut. Stick with fresh fruits and vegetables, raw meats, whole grains, etc.

#2: Don't make extra food for meals so there aren't leftovers.

#3: Get into the habit of doing physical exercise as a family--not to lose weight but to emphasize what a healthy lifestyle looks like. Tell the children that being healthy is a three-legged stool of Sleep, Exercise, and healthy Eating.

Can you work near the kitchen so you can monitor a bit better? My kid was not in the kitchen alone so this never came up.

I’m seriously curious. Do you work? What do you eat for lunch every day?

I am not the pp, but I basically eat the way they’re describing. I work, also. It’s really not that hard with some preparation. Make a whole chicken, eat the meat as leftovers for the next few lunches. Roast several different veggie sides at the same time, eat them for the next few days. Keep lettuce and various salad fixings on hand so you can throw together a salad and warm up some leftover chicken and throw it on top. Make a big batch of home made veggie sauce and gluten free pasta. Freeze some of the sauce. It is really not that hard.

But you don’t keep granola bars, pretzels, dried fruits, crackers, cereal, in the house at all? Even the healthiest of households keep some type of “snack” foods around at times. Kids can find anything to binge on and making dinner with zero leftovers is very difficult or not possible to do every night.

It’s completely possible to batch prep on weekends, then freeze. The food is still raw when you thaw it, then you cook unprocessed, healthy food for dinner.

It’s also completely possible to cook new batches of healthy food every evening, in 10-30 minutes.