s/o what counts as looking "put together"?

[Anonymous]

You people are so shallow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bikini pic women all look slim and healthy vs. just thin. I prefer more curves but if I had their bodies I wouldn't complain.

I think they look healthy but masculine. The average man would not prefer that in bed.

+1

They're fit but...not feminine

I respectfully disagree. They are all quite lean & athletic, so presumably in this poster's eyes fewer curves means less "feminine" (or something along those lines). To me, femininity has less to do with the features of a body & more to do with a person's disposition, her qualities, her grace, & her ideas about what makes one feminine. After all, I'm sure many of us have observed young girls whose bodies have not yet fully developed that we would describe as feminine.

Plus, as a petite, small boned woman there's nothing I can do naturally to make myself more curvy. There are many women out there with a body type like mine: sort of a "mini Cameron Diaz" body type- around 5'5, lean, & small breasts. If I put on weight, of course it doesn't go where I want it to go. So my choices are emphasize what I have - the athletic & lean look - by exercising & eating right, or let it go & look like a fire hydrant. And even if my body type isn't the most popular or most desirable, I like it, & I feel womanly in it. I think that's the most important thing when it comes to what is feminine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bikini pic women all look slim and healthy vs. just thin. I prefer more curves but if I had their bodies I wouldn't complain.

I think they look healthy but masculine. The average man would not prefer that in bed.

+1

They're fit but...not feminine

I respectfully disagree. They are all quite lean & athletic, so presumably in this poster's eyes fewer curves means less "feminine" (or something along those lines). To me, femininity has less to do with the features of a body & more to do with a person's disposition, her qualities, her grace, & her ideas about what makes one feminine. After all, I'm sure many of us have observed young girls whose bodies have not yet fully developed that we would describe as feminine.

Plus, as a petite, small boned woman there's nothing I can do naturally to make myself more curvy. There are many women out there with a body type like mine: sort of a "mini Cameron Diaz" body type- around 5'5, lean, & small breasts. If I put on weight, of course it doesn't go where I want it to go. So my choices are emphasize what I have - the athletic & lean look - by exercising & eating right, or let it go & look like a fire hydrant. And even if my body type isn't the most popular or most desirable, I like it, & I feel womanly in it. I think that's the most important thing when it comes to what is feminine.

Thank you for this. I have the same body type as well, and I feel plenty feminine, and men have always seemed to find me very feminine as well. I get tired of hearing that you have to be super curvy to be feminine (the whole "real women have curves" thing). I'm not curvy, but I'm certainly a real woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bikini pic women all look slim and healthy vs. just thin. I prefer more curves but if I had their bodies I wouldn't complain.

I think they look healthy but masculine. The average man would not prefer that in bed.

+1

They're fit but...not feminine

I respectfully disagree. They are all quite lean & athletic, so presumably in this poster's eyes fewer curves means less "feminine" (or something along those lines). To me, femininity has less to do with the features of a body & more to do with a person's disposition, her qualities, her grace, & her ideas about what makes one feminine. After all, I'm sure many of us have observed young girls whose bodies have not yet fully developed that we would describe as feminine.

Plus, as a petite, small boned woman there's nothing I can do naturally to make myself more curvy. There are many women out there with a body type like mine: sort of a "mini Cameron Diaz" body type- around 5'5, lean, & small breasts. If I put on weight, of course it doesn't go where I want it to go. So my choices are emphasize what I have - the athletic & lean look - by exercising & eating right, or let it go & look like a fire hydrant. And even if my body type isn't the most popular or most desirable, I like it, & I feel womanly in it. I think that's the most important thing when it comes to what is feminine.

Thank you for this. I have the same body type as well, and I feel plenty feminine, and men have always seemed to find me very feminine as well. I get tired of hearing that you have to be super curvy to be feminine (the whole "real women have curves" thing). I'm not curvy, but I'm certainly a real woman.

I don't think anyone's saying you need to be curvy or have big breasts to be feminine. It's the overly muscled look that's being referred to. I just don't think this looks attractive, though it's obviously fit, and there are plenty of ways to be a small woman without looking like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where are the tailors?

Mine is at my dry cleaners. I've had her take in things at the waist, adjust hems and sleeves, etc. Basically, if it's on a seam, it's pretty easy to alter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bikini pic women all look slim and healthy vs. just thin. I prefer more curves but if I had their bodies I wouldn't complain.

I think they look healthy but masculine. The average man would not prefer that in bed.

+1

They're fit but...not feminine

I respectfully disagree. They are all quite lean & athletic, so presumably in this poster's eyes fewer curves means less "feminine" (or something along those lines). To me, femininity has less to do with the features of a body & more to do with a person's disposition, her qualities, her grace, & her ideas about what makes one feminine. After all, I'm sure many of us have observed young girls whose bodies have not yet fully developed that we would describe as feminine.

Plus, as a petite, small boned woman there's nothing I can do naturally to make myself more curvy. There are many women out there with a body type like mine: sort of a "mini Cameron Diaz" body type- around 5'5, lean, & small breasts. If I put on weight, of course it doesn't go where I want it to go. So my choices are emphasize what I have - the athletic & lean look - by exercising & eating right, or let it go & look like a fire hydrant. And even if my body type isn't the most popular or most desirable, I like it, & I feel womanly in it. I think that's the most important thing when it comes to what is feminine.

Thank you for this. I have the same body type as well, and I feel plenty feminine, and men have always seemed to find me very feminine as well. I get tired of hearing that you have to be super curvy to be feminine (the whole "real women have curves" thing). I'm not curvy, but I'm certainly a real woman.

I don't think anyone's saying you need to be curvy or have big breasts to be feminine. It's the overly muscled look that's being referred to. I just don't think this looks attractive, though it's obviously fit, and there are plenty of ways to be a small woman without looking like this.

Who is that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bikini pic women all look slim and healthy vs. just thin. I prefer more curves but if I had their bodies I wouldn't complain.

I think they look healthy but masculine. The average man would not prefer that in bed.

+1

They're fit but...not feminine

I respectfully disagree. They are all quite lean & athletic, so presumably in this poster's eyes fewer curves means less "feminine" (or something along those lines). To me, femininity has less to do with the features of a body & more to do with a person's disposition, her qualities, her grace, & her ideas about what makes one feminine. After all, I'm sure many of us have observed young girls whose bodies have not yet fully developed that we would describe as feminine.

Plus, as a petite, small boned woman there's nothing I can do naturally to make myself more curvy. There are many women out there with a body type like mine: sort of a "mini Cameron Diaz" body type- around 5'5, lean, & small breasts. If I put on weight, of course it doesn't go where I want it to go. So my choices are emphasize what I have - the athletic & lean look - by exercising & eating right, or let it go & look like a fire hydrant. And even if my body type isn't the most popular or most desirable, I like it, & I feel womanly in it. I think that's the most important thing when it comes to what is feminine.

Thank you for this. I have the same body type as well, and I feel plenty feminine, and men have always seemed to find me very feminine as well. I get tired of hearing that you have to be super curvy to be feminine (the whole "real women have curves" thing). I'm not curvy, but I'm certainly a real woman.

A second thank you as well. I too have a petite, not very curvy frame. It's what DCUM likes to call looking like a "teenage boy".

I've never had an issue attracting men, my breasts are small but lovely, my hips are not very wide but I have nicely shaped (though not large) backside. These are my genetics, this is my shape. I have no desire for implants or injections to give myself a more curvy figure.

I'm every bit as much woman as a curvier woman is. Women need to just stop putting down other women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the bikini pic women all look slim and healthy vs. just thin. I prefer more curves but if I had their bodies I wouldn't complain.

I think they look healthy but masculine. The average man would not prefer that in bed.

+1

They're fit but...not feminine

I respectfully disagree. They are all quite lean & athletic, so presumably in this poster's eyes fewer curves means less "feminine" (or something along those lines). To me, femininity has less to do with the features of a body & more to do with a person's disposition, her qualities, her grace, & her ideas about what makes one feminine. After all, I'm sure many of us have observed young girls whose bodies have not yet fully developed that we would describe as feminine.

Plus, as a petite, small boned woman there's nothing I can do naturally to make myself more curvy. There are many women out there with a body type like mine: sort of a "mini Cameron Diaz" body type- around 5'5, lean, & small breasts. If I put on weight, of course it doesn't go where I want it to go. So my choices are emphasize what I have - the athletic & lean look - by exercising & eating right, or let it go & look like a fire hydrant. And even if my body type isn't the most popular or most desirable, I like it, & I feel womanly in it. I think that's the most important thing when it comes to what is feminine.

Thank you for this. I have the same body type as well, and I feel plenty feminine, and men have always seemed to find me very feminine as well. I get tired of hearing that you have to be super curvy to be feminine (the whole "real women have curves" thing). I'm not curvy, but I'm certainly a real woman.

I don't think anyone's saying you need to be curvy or have big breasts to be feminine. It's the overly muscled look that's being referred to. I just don't think this looks attractive, though it's obviously fit, and there are plenty of ways to be a small woman without looking like this.

Who is that?

Kelly Ripa

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look, no one is saying the onlyfactor is to be thin. But clearly it helps a lot right? I think that was the PP's point, which I actually agree with.

It's a lot harder for overweight people to look put together.

I think a major contributing factor is that it's much harder for overweight people to find clothes that fit properly. And when they do, they are rarely cut in a flattering way (e.g. big boxy shirts instead of tailored shirts).

To me, aside from the obvious things like cleanliness, the biggest factor is wearing properly fitted clothes. I don't care how much you spend on your clothes, if they don't fit they will look frumpy. When I lived in DC, I can't tell you how frequently I saw shorter women wearing pants that dragged on the ground or curvier women (who were generally not particularly overweight) wearing pants that fit their waist but pulled at their hips/butts to the point where it looked like the fabric would tear.

Tailoring is key, but people are reluctant to do it for whatever reason. Celebrities (and people like Michelle Obama) pretty much get every single thing they wear tailored. I even remember reading an article about Kate Middleton getting clothes tailored when she was pregnant. Whatever you think of these people's personal style, they pretty much always look put together.

After the basics of well-fitted clothes, I think the next thing that helps is footwear. Heels or nice flats will always look more "put together" than sneakers (though I love my sneakers).

Eloquii, Kiyonna and Dia & Co. Those brands fit us sizes 14/0X well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look, no one is saying the onlyfactor is to be thin. But clearly it helps a lot right? I think that was the PP's point, which I actually agree with.

It's a lot harder for overweight people to look put together.

I think a major contributing factor is that it's much harder for overweight people to find clothes that fit properly. And when they do, they are rarely cut in a flattering way (e.g. big boxy shirts instead of tailored shirts).

To me, aside from the obvious things like cleanliness, the biggest factor is wearing properly fitted clothes. I don't care how much you spend on your clothes, if they don't fit they will look frumpy. When I lived in DC, I can't tell you how frequently I saw shorter women wearing pants that dragged on the ground or curvier women (who were generally not particularly overweight) wearing pants that fit their waist but pulled at their hips/butts to the point where it looked like the fabric would tear.

Tailoring is key, but people are reluctant to do it for whatever reason. Celebrities (and people like Michelle Obama) pretty much get every single thing they wear tailored. I even remember reading an article about Kate Middleton getting clothes tailored when she was pregnant. Whatever you think of these people's personal style, they pretty much always look put together.

After the basics of well-fitted clothes, I think the next thing that helps is footwear. Heels or nice flats will always look more "put together" than sneakers (though I love my sneakers).

I agree that tailoring is key. I'm not sure why more people (with disposable income) don't get their clothes altered.

Sami

Many of us with disposable income don't have much disposable time, and other things are higher priority.

[Anonymous]

Cameran Diaz, Gwenyth Paltrow, Naomi Watts, Kristen Stewart, the Middleton sisters...yeah none of those women are considered attractive in the wider world Give me a break. Only bitter DCUM fatties would say they are unattractive and unfeminine.

Hello, they're *famous* for being beautiful! They're literally held up as the ideal female body.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. Can we please stop with the skinny shaming? Some (many?) people naturally have fast metabolisms.

You can be skinny and not have an eating disorder.

having read the past 3.5 pages, you think it's the skinny people who need folks to get more woke about how badly they are treated in society?

All three of those skinny women have absolutely no boobs! My husband loves my 36Cs!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cameran Diaz, Gwenyth Paltrow, Naomi Watts, Kristen Stewart, the Middleton sisters...yeah none of those women are considered attractive in the wider world Give me a break. Only bitter DCUM fatties would say they are unattractive and unfeminine.

Hello, they're *famous* for being beautiful! They're literally held up as the ideal female body.

None of them have good breasts. I hear some men like full breasts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cameran Diaz, Gwenyth Paltrow, Naomi Watts, Kristen Stewart, the Middleton sisters...yeah none of those women are considered attractive in the wider world Give me a break. Only bitter DCUM fatties would say they are unattractive and unfeminine.

Hello, they're *famous* for being beautiful! They're literally held up as the ideal female body.

+ 1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cameran Diaz, Gwenyth Paltrow, Naomi Watts, Kristen Stewart, the Middleton sisters...yeah none of those women are considered attractive in the wider world Give me a break. Only bitter DCUM fatties would say they are unattractive and unfeminine.

Hello, they're *famous* for being beautiful! They're literally held up as the ideal female body.

None of them have good breasts. I hear some men like full breasts.

Then why are these women all celebrated beauties who are paid millions of dollars to appear in movies (Hint: Naomi Watts aside, it's not their acting abilities?)