Do you make alternative dinners for your kids if they don't like what you made?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a picky water. I grew up eating in a family where everyone had different tastes and lots of times there will be multiple separate dishes cooked (and more if grandparents visit).
It's the same now. Each eats their own dish. Most of the dishes are simple (steak and grilled vegetables for one, grilled shrimp and raw vegetables for another, salad for the third person, etc). Even desserts are different. I don't like brownies without fruit in them, everyone one else hates fruit in the brownies, but some want nuts and some hate nuts. Four separate trays are baked.

You make four trays of brownies every time you bake? That's a lot of work!

I think it's good to teach kids to be adaptable, willing to explore new tastes and gracious to someone preparing the meals (i.e., saying thank you, eating what is on the plate that he DOES like) rather than indulge their very specific personal tastes. Obviously you are doing to/for your kids what your parents did, but maybe you would have been less picky growing up if you had branched out more from an early age. Many studies show kids have to try new foods repeatedly to grow to like them.

My parents didn't believe in any pressure other then by example. Food was always non-issue, not worth paying attention to, nobody liked junk food. My parents just let me be and I started cooking myself, experimenting. Making extra brownies is just three extra bowls for the dishwasher as they are all based on one recipe (http://www.browneyedbaker.com/outrageous-indeed/). It gets tricker with cakes. All of it is not a complication, but an adventure.
As for eating what's on the plate: lots of people don't know how to cook and kids have to suffer. We were volunteering at a food bank that provides bags of food for the weekend. People were commenting on cans of clams and other similar stuff as being bad tasting as they didn't even want to think that you can make pretty tasty dishes out of basic stuff.

You're setting your kids up to being really high maintenance partners to whoever they choose to spend their lives with.

Looks like people really hate cooking. It is so easy and fun. No wonder there are so many bad restaurants. It's no maintenance. My girlfriend and I started doing girls football Mondays when we cook, watch the game and have fun, while husband's are watching football somewhere. Women who never like cooking now send me recipes they find interesting. The funniest part was is that husbands decided to join in a year later (cooked too), I guess we were more fun.

It's not about liking or not liking to cook, it's about having the time. I like to cook, and make more elaborate meals on weekends. Even then my kids eat what I make, and always have. I don't make them separate "kid food" which is why now at ages 5 and 8 they will eat pretty much anything. Last night we had homemade lamb burgers with tzatziki sauce and jerusalem salad and they both ate everything.

I will play. Nothing prevents from making a beef burger next to a lamb burger and not mixing in onion and parsley into the salad.
Last night: kds - chicken fried rice and tomatoes (day three), DH - ribeye with roasted spaghetti squash and eggplant, me - kale and bean soup

What? What are even talking about? I DON'T HAVE TIME to make four different meals. If you do, and you want to spend the time doing it, good for you

Too bad We make time. Good food is very important to us. I don't like wasted calories and believe that each one has to be enjoyed. We are sports and food family.

What is a "sports and food family"? we all like sports and food too but no way would I (or my do) cook 3 different meals for the family and train our kids to always want special foods. But if you enjoy cooking all these meals and probably wasting a ton of leftovers then by all means do it. But don't imply that normal families i.e. Those who don't cook special meals for picky eaters are lazy or don't enjoy food (or sports ).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do people without picky kids assume its all about sweets? I can eat candy or sweet and my picky child, would never even think of wanting it or asking. He could take or leave sweets. I can leave candy on the counter for weeks and he would not touch it and take a granola bar instead.

you know a granola bar is no better than a snickers, right

The simple plain chocolate ones aren't not comparable to snickers.

yes they are, eat the snickers it tastes better..your body does not differentiate between the two

I don't like snickers or granola bars. My husband likes snickers, child will not eat them even though he can easily get them from the freezer. They are not comparable. Granola bars are better for you depending on which ones you buy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:not reading thru all these posts but wanted to say that I hate having kids over that wont eat anything unless it is crap food-including sugar cereal, "granola bars" mac n cheese, chicken fingers, plain cheese pizza..I have learned which kids not to have over for meals. Short get togethers ok but no meals.

Most picky kids are not eating all the stuff you say. Mine will not eat sugar cereals (we've tried). Nor will he eat chicken fingers as he does not eat meat. I prefer others don't feed him as he has food allergies and has gotten sick as people don't listen and say your kid needs to eat what we serve without looking at the ingredients and telling my child its safe. My child is picky but eats far more fruits and veggies than most people. Its a balance You give him a bowl of broccoli raw and he'd be happy. It is pretty easy if all you need to do is give a place of raw fresh veggies and fruit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:not reading thru all these posts but wanted to say that I hate having kids over that wont eat anything unless it is crap food-including sugar cereal, "granola bars" mac n cheese, chicken fingers, plain cheese pizza..I have learned which kids not to have over for meals. Short get togethers ok but no meals.

+1

Parent of older kids (12, 9 and 7).... here's a hint, OP... your kid will turn into a non-desirable guest as s/he gets older, if this is "the child" that won't eat anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a picky water. I grew up eating in a family where everyone had different tastes and lots of times there will be multiple separate dishes cooked (and more if grandparents visit).
It's the same now. Each eats their own dish. Most of the dishes are simple (steak and grilled vegetables for one, grilled shrimp and raw vegetables for another, salad for the third person, etc). Even desserts are different. I don't like brownies without fruit in them, everyone one else hates fruit in the brownies, but some want nuts and some hate nuts. Four separate trays are baked.

You make four trays of brownies every time you bake? That's a lot of work!

I think it's good to teach kids to be adaptable, willing to explore new tastes and gracious to someone preparing the meals (i.e., saying thank you, eating what is on the plate that he DOES like) rather than indulge their very specific personal tastes. Obviously you are doing to/for your kids what your parents did, but maybe you would have been less picky growing up if you had branched out more from an early age. Many studies show kids have to try new foods repeatedly to grow to like them.

My parents didn't believe in any pressure other then by example. Food was always non-issue, not worth paying attention to, nobody liked junk food. My parents just let me be and I started cooking myself, experimenting. Making extra brownies is just three extra bowls for the dishwasher as they are all based on one recipe (http://www.browneyedbaker.com/outrageous-indeed/). It gets tricker with cakes. All of it is not a complication, but an adventure.
As for eating what's on the plate: lots of people don't know how to cook and kids have to suffer. We were volunteering at a food bank that provides bags of food for the weekend. People were commenting on cans of clams and other similar stuff as being bad tasting as they didn't even want to think that you can make pretty tasty dishes out of basic stuff.

You're setting your kids up to being really high maintenance partners to whoever they choose to spend their lives with.

Looks like people really hate cooking. It is so easy and fun. No wonder there are so many bad restaurants. It's no maintenance. My girlfriend and I started doing girls football Mondays when we cook, watch the game and have fun, while husband's are watching football somewhere. Women who never like cooking now send me recipes they find interesting. The funniest part was is that husbands decided to join in a year later (cooked too), I guess we were more fun.

It's not about liking or not liking to cook, it's about having the time. I like to cook, and make more elaborate meals on weekends. Even then my kids eat what I make, and always have. I don't make them separate "kid food" which is why now at ages 5 and 8 they will eat pretty much anything. Last night we had homemade lamb burgers with tzatziki sauce and jerusalem salad and they both ate everything.

I will play. Nothing prevents from making a beef burger next to a lamb burger and not mixing in onion and parsley into the salad.
Last night: kds - chicken fried rice and tomatoes (day three), DH - ribeye with roasted spaghetti squash and eggplant, me - kale and bean soup

What? What are even talking about? I DON'T HAVE TIME to make four different meals. If you do, and you want to spend the time doing it, good for you

Too bad We make time. Good food is very important to us. I don't like wasted calories and believe that each one has to be enjoyed. We are sports and food family.

What is a "sports and food family"? we all like sports and food too but no way would I (or my do) cook 3 different meals for the family and train our kids to always want special foods. But if you enjoy cooking all these meals and probably wasting a ton of leftovers then by all means do it. But don't imply that normal families i.e. Those who don't cook special meals for picky eaters are lazy or don't enjoy food (or sports ).

There is no waste as foods are liked. I don't think it has anything to do with laziness, but with preferences. Our house is very cluttered, that's not a priority. It's also not about training. All my friends have very similar households (including my friends' parents ones when I was a kid), this thread is very surprising to me. I only know one person, who had "one meal for all" growing up, so he learned to cook fast. It is all new and puzzling to me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a picky water. I grew up eating in a family where everyone had different tastes and lots of times there will be multiple separate dishes cooked (and more if grandparents visit).
It's the same now. Each eats their own dish. Most of the dishes are simple (steak and grilled vegetables for one, grilled shrimp and raw vegetables for another, salad for the third person, etc). Even desserts are different. I don't like brownies without fruit in them, everyone one else hates fruit in the brownies, but some want nuts and some hate nuts. Four separate trays are baked.

You make four trays of brownies every time you bake? That's a lot of work!

I think it's good to teach kids to be adaptable, willing to explore new tastes and gracious to someone preparing the meals (i.e., saying thank you, eating what is on the plate that he DOES like) rather than indulge their very specific personal tastes. Obviously you are doing to/for your kids what your parents did, but maybe you would have been less picky growing up if you had branched out more from an early age. Many studies show kids have to try new foods repeatedly to grow to like them.

My parents didn't believe in any pressure other then by example. Food was always non-issue, not worth paying attention to, nobody liked junk food. My parents just let me be and I started cooking myself, experimenting. Making extra brownies is just three extra bowls for the dishwasher as they are all based on one recipe (http://www.browneyedbaker.com/outrageous-indeed/). It gets tricker with cakes. All of it is not a complication, but an adventure.
As for eating what's on the plate: lots of people don't know how to cook and kids have to suffer. We were volunteering at a food bank that provides bags of food for the weekend. People were commenting on cans of clams and other similar stuff as being bad tasting as they didn't even want to think that you can make pretty tasty dishes out of basic stuff.

You're setting your kids up to being really high maintenance partners to whoever they choose to spend their lives with.

Looks like people really hate cooking. It is so easy and fun. No wonder there are so many bad restaurants. It's no maintenance. My girlfriend and I started doing girls football Mondays when we cook, watch the game and have fun, while husband's are watching football somewhere. Women who never like cooking now send me recipes they find interesting. The funniest part was is that husbands decided to join in a year later (cooked too), I guess we were more fun.

It's not about liking or not liking to cook, it's about having the time. I like to cook, and make more elaborate meals on weekends. Even then my kids eat what I make, and always have. I don't make them separate "kid food" which is why now at ages 5 and 8 they will eat pretty much anything. Last night we had homemade lamb burgers with tzatziki sauce and jerusalem salad and they both ate everything.

I will play. Nothing prevents from making a beef burger next to a lamb burger and not mixing in onion and parsley into the salad.
Last night: kds - chicken fried rice and tomatoes (day three), DH - ribeye with roasted spaghetti squash and eggplant, me - kale and bean soup

What? What are even talking about? I DON'T HAVE TIME to make four different meals. If you do, and you want to spend the time doing it, good for you

Too bad We make time. Good food is very important to us. I don't like wasted calories and believe that each one has to be enjoyed. We are sports and food family.

What is a "sports and food family"? we all like sports and food too but no way would I (or my do) cook 3 different meals for the family and train our kids to always want special foods. But if you enjoy cooking all these meals and probably wasting a ton of leftovers then by all means do it. But don't imply that normal families i.e. Those who don't cook special meals for picky eaters are lazy or don't enjoy food (or sports ).

There is no waste as foods are liked. I don't think it has anything to do with laziness, but with preferences. Our house is very cluttered, that's not a priority. It's also not about training. All my friends have very similar households (including my friends' parents ones when I was a kid), this thread is very surprising to me. I only know one person, who had "one meal for all" growing up, so he learned to cook fast. It is all new and puzzling to me

Pp here. I'm really surprised that people cook all these special meals. What is the reasoning behind it - especially for adults? You cooked steak for your husband and kale for yourself and then a third dinner for the kids? Maybe your husband is a picky eater too. What does that say about how he was parented? I eat and enjoy most foods as does my husband. The only food I can think of off hand that I don't like is papaya and my husband doesn't like strawberries. But apart from that we eat and enjoy everything because we're adults. Both of us are decent cooks so the food tastes good. My older kid enjoys eating almost everything too and the younger one sometimes doesn't like things (for example pasta sauce or potatoes) so she doesn't eat those but eats the other parts of the dinner. We're all normal weight and generally healthy. We waste very little food as we all enjoy eating a variety of foods.

[Anonymous]

Ok, previous poster, you're surprised. And...?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is no waste as foods are liked. I don't think it has anything to do with laziness, but with preferences. Our house is very cluttered, that's not a priority. It's also not about training. All my friends have very similar households (including my friends' parents ones when I was a kid), this thread is very surprising to me. I only know one person, who had "one meal for all" growing up, so he learned to cook fast. It is all new and puzzling to me

Pp here. I'm really surprised that people cook all these special meals. What is the reasoning behind it - especially for adults? You cooked steak for your husband and kale for yourself and then a third dinner for the kids? Maybe your husband is a picky eater too. What does that say about how he was parented? I eat and enjoy most foods as does my husband. The only food I can think of off hand that I don't like is papaya and my husband doesn't like strawberries. But apart from that we eat and enjoy everything because we're adults. Both of us are decent cooks so the food tastes good. My older kid enjoys eating almost everything too and the younger one sometimes doesn't like things (for example pasta sauce or potatoes) so she doesn't eat those but eats the other parts of the dinner. We're all normal weight and generally healthy. We waste very little food as we all enjoy eating a variety of foods.

Steak and kale PP. DH is not a picky eater at all, but, as all of us, has preferences. So are kids, so am I. I live with the notion that life has to be enjoyed. Food and physical activities are the easiest ones to make enjoyable (for me). If dinner time comes and I feel like smoothie, I will make a smoothie, I don't think twice about it. I don't eat meat every day, don't want it, but the rest do. DH likes steak on the bone, kids would not touch the bone, thus different cuts (that particular time is because bone in ribeye and pork loin were on sale We are not an overworked household, average corporate people, typical kids activities. We buy what's on sale and what's in season, so meals are never planned.

[Anonymous]

Just asked DH why would anyone subject their loved ones to the foods they don't like. He said:" Because they hate them". I said: "Seriously? ". He insisted

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is no waste as foods are liked. I don't think it has anything to do with laziness, but with preferences. Our house is very cluttered, that's not a priority. It's also not about training. All my friends have very similar households (including my friends' parents ones when I was a kid), this thread is very surprising to me. I only know one person, who had "one meal for all" growing up, so he learned to cook fast. It is all new and puzzling to me

Pp here. I'm really surprised that people cook all these special meals. What is the reasoning behind it - especially for adults? You cooked steak for your husband and kale for yourself and then a third dinner for the kids? Maybe your husband is a picky eater too. What does that say about how he was parented? I eat and enjoy most foods as does my husband. The only food I can think of off hand that I don't like is papaya and my husband doesn't like strawberries. But apart from that we eat and enjoy everything because we're adults. Both of us are decent cooks so the food tastes good. My older kid enjoys eating almost everything too and the younger one sometimes doesn't like things (for example pasta sauce or potatoes) so she doesn't eat those but eats the other parts of the dinner. We're all normal weight and generally healthy. We waste very little food as we all enjoy eating a variety of foods.

Steak and kale PP. DH is not a picky eater at all, but, as all of us, has preferences. So are kids, so am I. I live with the notion that life has to be enjoyed. Food and physical activities are the easiest ones to make enjoyable (for me). If dinner time comes and I feel like smoothie, I will make a smoothie, I don't think twice about it. I don't eat meat every day, don't want it, but the rest do. DH likes steak on the bone, kids would not touch the bone, thus different cuts (that particular time is because bone in ribeye and pork loin were on sale We are not an overworked household, average corporate people, typical kids activities. We buy what's on sale and what's in season, so meals are never planned.

NP. I know everyone's different, so I'm not going to judge. But I'm curious if your family all eats together. Just the logistics of putting together so many foods at the same time seem overwhelming to me.

I do, however, find it odd that you only knew one person growing up with a "one meal for all" household. I literally cannot think of a single friend (of any religion or ethnicity) that didn't have "one meal for all". The only exception, if you can call it that, is that my aunt and uncle that we did almost all holidays with would let kids eat a very kid friendly meal (i.e. hot dogs or similar) because the holiday meals were usually quite heavy and adults sat down to dinner much later than kids wanted to eat. The only exception was thanksgiving where we all ate together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just asked DH why would anyone subject their loved ones to the foods they don't like. He said:" Because they hate them". I said: "Seriously? ". He insisted

But most people enjoy a variety of foods. I can't imagine sating to my dh as he cooks dinner "I don't like meat with the bone in" so cook me a separate dinner of steak without the bone". Or I want kale for dinner so cook me some kale. Really who cares? It all tastes good and he's a great cook. To me it would be really rude to insist that he shop and cook based on my (or the kids) whims and would send the message to the kids that the world revolves around them.

I'm food is to be enjoyed -and that means a variety of foods and new foods sometimes.

[Anonymous]

We do, but only because there are so many food allergies in our house. XH can't have any grains. I can't eat a bunch of vegetables and garlic. She had a bunch of food allergies that have come and gone. When she was little, we were happy if we could get her to eat anything at all. And, I don't want to make her eat anything, because I am worried something might present as a food allergy or sensitivity. I've gone into anaphyllaxis pretty bad this year myself over silly foods I had no idea about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is no waste as foods are liked. I don't think it has anything to do with laziness, but with preferences. Our house is very cluttered, that's not a priority. It's also not about training. All my friends have very similar households (including my friends' parents ones when I was a kid), this thread is very surprising to me. I only know one person, who had "one meal for all" growing up, so he learned to cook fast. It is all new and puzzling to me

Pp here. I'm really surprised that people cook all these special meals. What is the reasoning behind it - especially for adults? You cooked steak for your husband and kale for yourself and then a third dinner for the kids? Maybe your husband is a picky eater too. What does that say about how he was parented? I eat and enjoy most foods as does my husband. The only food I can think of off hand that I don't like is papaya and my husband doesn't like strawberries. But apart from that we eat and enjoy everything because we're adults. Both of us are decent cooks so the food tastes good. My older kid enjoys eating almost everything too and the younger one sometimes doesn't like things (for example pasta sauce or potatoes) so she doesn't eat those but eats the other parts of the dinner. We're all normal weight and generally healthy. We waste very little food as we all enjoy eating a variety of foods.

Steak and kale PP. DH is not a picky eater at all, but, as all of us, has preferences. So are kids, so am I. I live with the notion that life has to be enjoyed. Food and physical activities are the easiest ones to make enjoyable (for me). If dinner time comes and I feel like smoothie, I will make a smoothie, I don't think twice about it. I don't eat meat every day, don't want it, but the rest do. DH likes steak on the bone, kids would not touch the bone, thus different cuts (that particular time is because bone in ribeye and pork loin were on sale We are not an overworked household, average corporate people, typical kids activities. We buy what's on sale and what's in season, so meals are never planned.

NP. I know everyone's different, so I'm not going to judge. But I'm curious if your family all eats together. Just the logistics of putting together so many foods at the same time seem overwhelming to me.

I do, however, find it odd that you only knew one person growing up with a "one meal for all" household. I literally cannot think of a single friend (of any religion or ethnicity) that didn't have "one meal for all". The only exception, if you can call it that, is that my aunt and uncle that we did almost all holidays with would let kids eat a very kid friendly meal (i.e. hot dogs or similar) because the holiday meals were usually quite heavy and adults sat down to dinner much later than kids wanted to eat. The only exception was thanksgiving where we all ate together.

Kids are in high school, so no more weekday dinners for all (they come home after 8). Logistically, it's actually easier for me to have different stuff as I don't like to cook big amounts of the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:not reading thru all these posts but wanted to say that I hate having kids over that wont eat anything unless it is crap food-including sugar cereal, "granola bars" mac n cheese, chicken fingers, plain cheese pizza..I have learned which kids not to have over for meals. Short get togethers ok but no meals.

Most picky kids are not eating all the stuff you say. Mine will not eat sugar cereals (we've tried). Nor will he eat chicken fingers as he does not eat meat. I prefer others don't feed him as he has food allergies and has gotten sick as people don't listen and say your kid needs to eat what we serve without looking at the ingredients and telling my child its safe. My child is picky but eats far more fruits and veggies than most people. Its a balance You give him a bowl of broccoli raw and he'd be happy. It is pretty easy if all you need to do is give a place of raw fresh veggies and fruit.

no I will not.I make one dinner and will not give your kid a bowl, a plate or anything the rest of our family is not eating. Sorry. I spend a lot of time meal planning. Eating healthy is important to our family and I find it disrespectful to have to cater to your kids "special" dietary needs after I have already offered a healthy meal to them. Your kid will not eat at our house. We have three older kids-MS and HS and their friends eat at our home frequently with no issues. Unless there is an allergy you get what you get or go home and eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is no waste as foods are liked. I don't think it has anything to do with laziness, but with preferences. Our house is very cluttered, that's not a priority. It's also not about training. All my friends have very similar households (including my friends' parents ones when I was a kid), this thread is very surprising to me. I only know one person, who had "one meal for all" growing up, so he learned to cook fast. It is all new and puzzling to me

Pp here. I'm really surprised that people cook all these special meals. What is the reasoning behind it - especially for adults? You cooked steak for your husband and kale for yourself and then a third dinner for the kids? Maybe your husband is a picky eater too. What does that say about how he was parented? I eat and enjoy most foods as does my husband. The only food I can think of off hand that I don't like is papaya and my husband doesn't like strawberries. But apart from that we eat and enjoy everything because we're adults. Both of us are decent cooks so the food tastes good. My older kid enjoys eating almost everything too and the younger one sometimes doesn't like things (for example pasta sauce or potatoes) so she doesn't eat those but eats the other parts of the dinner. We're all normal weight and generally healthy. We waste very little food as we all enjoy eating a variety of foods.

Steak and kale PP. DH is not a picky eater at all, but, as all of us, has preferences. So are kids, so am I. I live with the notion that life has to be enjoyed. Food and physical activities are the easiest ones to make enjoyable (for me). If dinner time comes and I feel like smoothie, I will make a smoothie, I don't think twice about it. I don't eat meat every day, don't want it, but the rest do. DH likes steak on the bone, kids would not touch the bone, thus different cuts (that particular time is because bone in ribeye and pork loin were on sale We are not an overworked household, average corporate people, typical kids activities. We buy what's on sale and what's in season, so meals are never planned.

Sure, everyone has preferences. But it it necessary to cater to them all the time?

I don't love scrambled eggs, but if DH makes them for breakfast, I say "thank you for making breakfast" and eat them.