Please explain Southern-style communication to a clueless Yankee

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Freeman wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I am a Southerner?? Texan here, and when referring to the geographic area, I prefer to say Texan vs South or Southerner, etc.

Yep, Texan is definitely different from Southern. Of course, I grew up in south Alabama, and we didn't think those idiots in north Alabama really qualified as Southerners either. And don't even get me started on Florida...

Tennessee here- Just have to say, Amen on Florida!

Geography according to a Southerner:

Florida doesn't count. It's an annex of the North.
Texas doesn't count either. It counts more than Florida, but really, it's just its own entity and should be treated as such. Texas is basically just its own distinct region.
Virginia as the south is pushing it; NoVa does NOT count. I'd say Richmond is as high north as you can get and still be considered "South."
Rednecks live in such places as Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina, and Mississippi. In Louisiana, you have swamp trash. In Tennessee and Kentucky and North Carolina, you have hillbillies. They're all very distinct groups, so please get your pejoratives correct when you use them!
Missouri is the Midwest, not the South, do not make us laugh. Same with Indiana. I don't care if that shit borders Kentucky; Kentucky barely gets a pass itself. If you are from Indiana, you are a Midwesterner.

I mostly agree with this. As a Texan, I would say that Texas is its own region, but folks from East Texas identify as Southern, and those from West Texas as southwestern. I think its because most of the east Texans are descended from people who migrated there from Alabama and Mississippi, and other Southern states, so they are more "culturally" Southern.

I don't know what Kentucky is, but it is NOT the South. The Florida panhandle is Southern. Agree about Richmond being the Northern limit in Virginia, but there are a few old families in Alexandria who are still holding on. When I was a kid, my family was visiting this area, and we saw a sign that said something along the lines of "the greatest xxx in the South" and everyone in my family thought it was hysterically funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Mine is sweet. Someone's kid is acting a fool and they apologize: "Awww... she's sweet. "

Hilarious - and spot on! My go-to is "lovely". You have to be practiced in the art of social niceties and subtleties to decipher the meanings of compliments and invitations. The bottom line is that no Properly Raised and Polite Person would ever say anything rude outright. Makes for some interesting social navigation if you aren't used to it!

Ah, perhaps that the difference between us "Yankees" and the "Southerners". I consider someone backhandedly sniping like this to be the ultimate in rude. I would bite my tongue and not say anything before I would be so obliquely obnoxious. To me, it's churlish to say something rude, but even worse to mean it, but couch it in such disingenuous phrases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:wow, I am shocked! I'll never pick up on these things!
What do you say when you do mean it, to say something truly positive???!!

Does this mean they are raised to be passive aggressive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone mentioned saying that you don't know someone well when asked about a person you don't like?

This is exactly what I say! (Marylander here) if I don't like someone I'll just say I don't know them very well but they seem nice enough. If I actually like someone I just say it.

[Anonymous]

Hey -- I think this Jerz girl (born there, but California-bred) finally figured out the proper use of "bless your heart."

an excerpt from the Beauty and Fashion Forum thread on what not to wear after 40:

"The 60+ year old owner of my child's preschool has worn acid washed jeggings. She has also worn Juicy sweatpants"

Well, bless her heart!

Hey -- I think this Jerz gir

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Freeman wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I am a Southerner?? Texan here, and when referring to the geographic area, I prefer to say Texan vs South or Southerner, etc.

Yep, Texan is definitely different from Southern. Of course, I grew up in south Alabama, and we didn't think those idiots in north Alabama really qualified as Southerners either. And don't even get me started on Florida...

Tennessee here- Just have to say, Amen on Florida!

Geography according to a Southerner:

Florida doesn't count. It's an annex of the North.
Texas doesn't count either. It counts more than Florida, but really, it's just its own entity and should be treated as such. Texas is basically just its own distinct region.
Virginia as the south is pushing it; NoVa does NOT count. I'd say Richmond is as high north as you can get and still be considered "South."
Rednecks live in such places as Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina, and Mississippi. In Louisiana, you have swamp trash. In Tennessee and Kentucky and North Carolina, you have hillbillies. They're all very distinct groups, so please get your pejoratives correct when you use them!
Missouri is the Midwest, not the South, do not make us laugh. Same with Indiana. I don't care if that shit borders Kentucky; Kentucky barely gets a pass itself. If you are from Indiana, you are a Midwesterner.

I mostly agree with this. As a Texan, I would say that Texas is its own region, but folks from East Texas identify as Southern, and those from West Texas as southwestern. I think its because most of the east Texans are descended from people who migrated there from Alabama and Mississippi, and other Southern states, so they are more "culturally" Southern.

I don't know what Kentucky is, but it is NOT the South. The Florida panhandle is Southern. Agree about Richmond being the Northern limit in Virginia, but there are a few old families in Alexandria who are still holding on. When I was a kid, my family was visiting this area, and we saw a sign that said something along the lines of "the greatest xxx in the South" and everyone in my family thought it was hysterically funny.

Kentucky is a border state. It is the South; it's just not the deep South. Same thing with Missouri, Delaware and Maryland. They were slave states that did not secede. I count the border states as "Southern" because they were slave states at the time of the Civil War. These states are south of the Mason-Dixon line. There are regional differences, but they are Southern states.

[Anonymous]

Can we discuss "Awww" ?

[Anonymous]

Gotta say that to a Northerner, Richmond is pretty Southern. It was the capitol of the Confederacy, after all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gotta say that to a Northerner, Richmond is pretty Southern. It was the capitol of the Confederacy, after all.

Yeah, and considering Robert E. Lee's home was in Arlington and one of the main confederate forces was the Army of Northern Virginia, you're gonna have a hard time convincing this northerner that Northern Virginia isn't the South. Hell, MD is below the Mason-Dixon Line, so I'm kinda suspicious of them. VA's not even in the discussion.

As for all you squabbling over whether Texas, Kentucky, etc. are somehow different, from where we sit - you're all the South. (Don't take it personally, we feel the same way about the great undifferentiated Midwest.) Although I think it goes both ways - how often have I heard Southerners talk about the "Northeast" as if it's one big place, when it's obviously not. I'm from NJ, and I think Mainers are a different species, while people from Vermont might as well be from a different planet.

[Anonymous]

I am learning so much from this thread! I am northerner who still can't believe that I live south of the mason Dixon line sometimes. I used "lovely" yesterday. I also say ... He has a good heart... Sort of a spin off of bless her heart

[Anonymous]

This thread missed (to my mind) the best one of all. I'm from NJ, and my best friend from law school was from GA. I was having a hard time with my soon to be MIL on wedding planning issues, and my best friend taught me the "southern" way of saying "No f'ing way am I doing that!!!!!"

"Wow...that's just a great i-dea, and I will put that in my file of great i-deas." (Said with a southern drawl while tilting head just-so.)

[Anonymous]

Pp that is a really great lesson to learn early on, specifically with a MIL or any other people who want to give you parenting advice!

[Anonymous]

I've been posting on this thread off and on for the past few days, but it just occurred to me that these differences may just be behind the reasons why my sisters and I just cannot get past a surface relationship with one of our aunts, who is from Massachusetts, because she just does not pick up on the way we think it's kind of rude and self-promoting that she always goes on and on about herself, her life, her work, and her kids. We say polite things in reply such as, ""Awwww, that's so cute!" or "That sounds so nice!" or "Awwww, they're so sweet!" but, amongst ourselves, we exclaim how much she seems to go on and on about herself, and to wonder why she does not pick up on the fact that, by not "returnign" the conversational pattern ourselves, and going on and on about OURselves, that we think this is unpleasant. Hmmm, maybe she truly thinks we are THAT interested in her and that we truly think what she is saying IS truly "sweet," "nice," and "lovely." Hmm, this thread has been enlightening to me!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread missed (to my mind) the best one of all. I'm from NJ, and my best friend from law school was from GA. I was having a hard time with my soon to be MIL on wedding planning issues, and my best friend taught me the "southern" way of saying "No f'ing way am I doing that!!!!!"

"Wow...that's just a great i-dea, and I will put that in my file of great i-deas." (Said with a southern drawl while tilting head just-so.)

I say something similar! I'll say, "I'll have to remember to put that on my list!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Well bless your heart."

Sound's nice, right? Well, in Southern, it means "you bitch."

Big Rich Texas fan!