What’s a reasonable allowance for a 17 year old senior? Assume they can’t work until this summer (sport and school and

Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.


That’s insane


1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.



Hanging out at your house is free. Or he can get a job and pay for his dates


You’d rather my kid hang in our basement with his girlfriend than take her on a proper date at least once a month. Or catch a capitals game once a month with his friends? No wonder young men are such a mess now a days.

You think he should give up golfing?

You think he should quit coaching kids and being a special Olympics unified partner to “get a job”?

The whole question was for kids who can’t work right now due to school/sports/volunteering. It wasn’t for slackers hanging in mom’s basement.

I’m 43 and I make 200k a year and a capitals game is a splurge for my and DH. It’s hundreds of dollars plus transportation or parking, plus food and drinks. That’s not a normal way for a 17 year old to hang out


Yeah, the expectation that it’s normal to take two people to a wildly expensive professional sports game “once a month” is totally bizarre.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.


That’s insane


1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.



Hanging out at your house is free. Or he can get a job and pay for his dates


You’d rather my kid hang in our basement with his girlfriend than take her on a proper date at least once a month. Or catch a capitals game once a month with his friends? No wonder young men are such a mess now a days.

You think he should give up golfing?

You think he should quit coaching kids and being a special Olympics unified partner to “get a job”?

The whole question was for kids who can’t work right now due to school/sports/volunteering. It wasn’t for slackers hanging in mom’s basement.

I’m 43 and I make 200k a year and a capitals game is a splurge for my and DH. It’s hundreds of dollars plus transportation or parking, plus food and drinks. That’s not a normal way for a 17 year old to hang out


He’ll literally go to 1 this season.

It’s not 100’s if you sit in nosebleeds it’s a bit more than a movie.

He took his girlfriend to see the playoffs for women’s soccer and it was $40 /ticket if you sat in the end zones.

I think that’s a normal monthly date. $100 ish


Maybe for rich people but most people do t have an extra $100 to blow on “a normal monthly date.”


Well they are spending $25 on wings today and going to a movie over the holidays so they also can’t afford a caps game either.


Unless he is paying himself, he can make food at home and watch Netflix


How much does it cost to make food at home? It’s not free. And I’d be paying.

Y’all are fooling yourself if you think your kids are not spending $100 a month on Starbucks, soda, chipotle, etc,

I don’t believe for a second your kids never eat out, never go to the movies, don’t buy makeup or clothes or go out with friends and if they don’t that too bad.


You are giving your kid $500 a month..


We budget $500 sometimes it’s less.

I give him $100 for take out, that is chipotle 2x a week.

I give him $100-$200 to spend time with friends (which is normally golf 2x a month but could be golf 1x and a concert ).

I give him $100 to spend on his girlfriend.

I give him $100 for gas, parking, clothes, etc.

He also volunteers every weekend in the winter/spring and has been since he was 11.

His money from his job usually runs out in December. Teens can’t get 40 hours a week.

Every other thread about teens is like why aren’t you people raising your sons to be a better?

I have a son who volunteers, has good friends, takes his girlfriend out on proper dates.

And everybody on this thread is saying he should be sitting in his basement making food or choosing hoops at the park.

GMAFB


Do you know how stupid you sound every time you come back to double down on the tired “basement” line, as if those two extremes are the only options?

Just wondering, because it seems like you don’t. “GMAFB,” indeed.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.


That’s insane


1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.


Playing basketball at the local park or in someone’s driveway is free. Kicking around a soccer ball is free. There are a thousand different ways your son could take his girlfriend on dates that cost less than $50 that would show effort and actual thought.


And they do that. But we expect him to take her on one proper date once a month. And pay for things.

They are watching the Bills game this afternoon (the wings will cost me $25), after they go hit golf balls ($20).

You want them to eat oodles of noodles in my basement after basketball at the park?

Again this might be the root of the loneliness epidemic.

They go on hikes, and run together and watch movies and Stranger things.

Shoot a movie out is $50.

They do free things and things that cost $. Even a movie in my basement is $20 worth of pizza.


WTF does a “proper” date mean? One where he spends $100 of your money? And you insist he needs to do this? That is bizarre. He is 17 with no job


Since you asked. A proper date is when you plan something, ask if they are available and you pay for it. sometimes you pick them up, if you do you go in and say hi to the parents or at least you’ve met the parents, you can meet somewhere if the parents have already met you.

Rarely are they $100 … they are generally $25 if you go out once a week but if you do go to the movies and it’s $50. The next 2 dates might just be going for a hike and making sandwiches.


If you see them out or meet up as a group, it’s not a date you generally don’t pay … like a school event or chipotle after school or a bunch of kids going ice skating.

Hanging out in a boys basement is generally not a proper date. But she wanted to see the bills game so that’s today’s date.

He’s not 17 with no job. He’s 17 with a job in the summer. That money usually lasts till December.


How does he manage to spend what I can assume is around 5k, in 3-3.5 months??? He doesn't save any of his money from the summer? This is insane to me.


His budget is $500/mth. He makes ~$3600/ summer … $15/hr x 30/wk x 8 weeks

He spends $500/month.

That runs out in December 7x500=3,500

Jan-may we give him $500/mth because I expect him to do school/sports/volunteer (every Sunday) plus I expect him to have a social life. No sitting minute basement gaming all weekend.

The question was if your kid can’t work, how much money do you give them per month?

He literally spends $13/weeks on his girlfriend and people flipped their lid.

I seriously feel like I figured out why men are having an issue dating when budgeting $25/week for dates is insane to people.


That’s not what you said- at all. Including you insist he takes her at least a one “proper” date per month to the tune of >$100, chipotle at least twice per week, etc. But whatever…no kid needs to spend $500/month plus the unlimited uber you already pay for in order to be social. If he makes $3500 in the summer- he can figure out how to budget that to last 10 months. It isn’t that hard and does not equate to zero social life- at all. $350 per month spending money for a teen is still plenty of money. He could still do his is weekly $25 dates as you say thats all he spends on her with $250 to spare. Where is it all going? He should learn to live within his means. You aren’t helping him, socially or otherwise, by enabling his over the top spending habits.


No, that’s what you read.. not what I said. I said $100 per month.

Sometimes that’s $25 per week. Every blue moon it’s a Caps or mysticsgame and they have to go hiking the other days that cost nothing.

That’s why it’s called teaching your kids how to budget.

He gets chipotle twice a week. BFD. We make dinner three nights a week. We have leftovers and other food you can make the other nights and guess what you can pick up chipotle if you want two nights a week.

Sure he could budget, but I think his budget should be 500 a month and that’s what we told him and at the end of the summer we tell him we will supplement the rest because we want him to learn how to have a social life. We don’t want him sitting in our basement.

I know where it’s all going and I gave you the budget?

I’m sorry your husband doesn’t ever plan a date for you and you think that $12.4 a week is a lot of money. And $200 a month is a huge amount of money to spend on yourself working out, doing a hobby, whatever. It’s odd to me you think $100 a month is a lot of money to spend on clothes.



My kids learned how to budget with their own money. I’m sure their budget with money from the bank of Mom would be different. I cannot believe a 17 year old boy would take money from his mom every month to spend on his girlfriend. How embarrassing.


Sure, Jan.

Nobody believes that your 17-year-old doesn’t buy chipotle with your money.

Nothing you said is believable.

There’s no 17-year-old in the DMV that is 100% independent of their parents money.



They’s right. Nobody in poverty lives in this area. Nobody.

Give me a break. I have to choose which bills to pay each month and which ones to put off because I don’t have enough to pay them all. We sometimes visit food banks. I used to forgo meals when my kid was younger.

So no, my 17 year old doesn’t get money from me. I don’t have any extra to give him. He works and earns his own money. Plenty of high school kids work. You just live in a bubble. He also would never blow his hard earned money on the crap OP mentions. Not many 17 yr old boys who are comfortable taking money from their moms to take their girlfriends out on dates.



Agree. But even if you aren’t in poverty and have the money to spend, I would still not give my teen $500 month in spending money. Whether they are a prepping to be a D1 athlete is irrelevant- I’m not throwing extra money at my kid bc they have more free time and don’t play a sport so they can blow it on takeout, new clothes every month, dates, and whatever else would use it up.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My teens each get $300/mo but we own a small business consider some of it their pay for doing office cleaning about 2hrs/wk each. (Mopping, sweeping, breaking down boxes, taking out the trash, etc) They rotate days.

They pay for their own gas (we pay for cars and insurance), entertainment expenses, anything that is a want and not a need. We almost never give them any other $ throughout the month.

Works well for us so far.


You are raising good kids. The poster above who gives her son money for golf dates is raising a little prick, but she doesn’t know it yet. It’s not just whether you have the money or not, it’s whether you want to set a tone of having to work for things in life. Golf is not a necessity. Acting like it is is so cringe I can barely believe this mom isn’t a troll. I want my kids to have good values and work ethic and so do the other parents I know.


Holy cow! I’m the prick? Reread your post.

nobody said the budget was a necessity.

How is working in the summer, having great grades, volunteering, and doing a school sport not having a work ethic?

Y’all grew up in some generation that things you guys should never do anything fun or spend any money having fun. No wonder everybody’s kids are in on Prozac.

Touch grass.



‘Touch grass’?
Y’all?

As I suspected, you’re likely from modest means or not well educated and this is your UMC flex. You’re not helping your kid, just so you know.


Yes, and “GMAFB.” Low class who now has money and desperately needs to flaunt it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.


That’s insane


1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.



Hanging out at your house is free. Or he can get a job and pay for his dates


You’d rather my kid hang in our basement with his girlfriend than take her on a proper date at least once a month. Or catch a capitals game once a month with his friends? No wonder young men are such a mess now a days.

You think he should give up golfing?

You think he should quit coaching kids and being a special Olympics unified partner to “get a job”?

The whole question was for kids who can’t work right now due to school/sports/volunteering. It wasn’t for slackers hanging in moms basement.


I am clapping and cheering your parenting. Thank you for raising a son correctly and thank you for teaching him to give of himself to others. He has all of his life to work, volunteering is super important and not enough kids do it or are taught to do it. Keep up the great work and let the haters hate, IMO it shows you are on the right path.


😂😂😂
Anonymous
I’ve been reading this thread for enjoyment while on vacation this week. Now I’m home. I also have a 17 yo. If my any chance it’s real, I’ll add I would tell my kid to stop volunteering and get a real paying job if he was asking me for money for “proper dates” or an allowance. We keep stressing that this is the time to work and save for college spending since he’s leaving in less than a year.

But keep responding on the allowance talk, OP. It’s been entertaining.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I’ve been reading this thread for enjoyment while on vacation this week. Now I’m home. I also have a 17 yo. If my any chance it’s real, I’ll add I would tell my kid to stop volunteering and get a real paying job if he was asking me for money for “proper dates” or an allowance. We keep stressing that this is the time to work and save for college spending since he’s leaving in less than a year.

But keep responding on the allowance talk, OP. It’s been entertaining.


I’m op and the basement, ‘proper dates’, volunteer etc chatter hasn’t been me at all. I’ve just been reading, being entertained too
Anonymous
My kids were too busy in HS with academics, ECs, volunteering, unpaid internships to date. They had access to our uber app, starbucks app, amazon, paypal, apple pay and a credit card and there was no budget.

But, frankly, they were high achieving magnet HS students who were hanging out with other equally busy and nerdy magnet kids. All the friends were equally price and budget conscious. None of them was boozing, vaping, taking drugs or starbucking. Extremely intelligent kids who made good choices then and continue to make good choices in college and the working world.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My kids were too busy in HS with academics, ECs, volunteering, unpaid internships to date. They had access to our uber app, starbucks app, amazon, paypal, apple pay and a credit card and there was no budget.

But, frankly, they were high achieving magnet HS students who were hanging out with other equally busy and nerdy magnet kids. All the friends were equally price and budget conscious. None of them was boozing, vaping, taking drugs or starbucking. Extremely intelligent kids who made good choices then and continue to make good choices in college and the working world.


I don’t believe you, Jan
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’ve been reading this thread for enjoyment while on vacation this week. Now I’m home. I also have a 17 yo. If my any chance it’s real, I’ll add I would tell my kid to stop volunteering and get a real paying job if he was asking me for money for “proper dates” or an allowance. We keep stressing that this is the time to work and save for college spending since he’s leaving in less than a year.

But keep responding on the allowance talk, OP. It’s been entertaining.


I’m op and the basement, ‘proper dates’, volunteer etc chatter hasn’t been me at all. I’ve just been reading, being entertained too


That’s fantastic and even better.
Anonymous
This thread is amazing. Thanks for the entertaining topic, OP.

I haven't read every post, but I am guessing that the family of the kid getting $500 a month plus unlimited Ubers is wealthy, and the kid will have a trust fund so that his current teenage lifestyle won't spoil him from making good financial decisions when he is living on his own because he will always have plenty of funds?

We earn have a 300HHI and live in an area less expensive than DC where this amount goes reasonably far. Our high schooler gets $50 a month and earns the rest through babysitting, pet sitting, etc. Our kid manages to save a lot.
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