"The trouble is with men's sperm" - NYTimes headline

[Anonymous]

I'm just so sick of people encountering infertility in their late 30s and 40s with SURPRISE. This should not be a surprise to ANYONE. Or then complaining about the cost of fertility treatments.

It just seems the absolute height of hubris. That you, and your body, are somehow immune to basic biological processes, that your fertility should wait on YOU and your timeline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm just so sick of people encountering infertility in their late 30s and 40s with SURPRISE. This should not be a surprise to ANYONE. Or then complaining about the cost of fertility treatments.

It just seems the absolute height of hubris. That you, and your body, are somehow immune to basic biological processes, that your fertility should wait on YOU and your timeline.

Literally no one is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I feel like everyone is trying a little too hard to avoid the true answer to the infertility issues. Have children when you are younger. Even the issues highlighted in this article, and thank you to the author for highlighting the misogynistic tenor of infertility (it's NOT always the woman's fault!), many of which can be avoided by not waiting until your junk is ancient.

I get it, it's hugely inconvenient, you aren't as rich as you imagine you may be in your 30s/40s, you want to party and travel, etc.

I fully respect the choice to be child-free. But if you think you want kids, find a spouse and get on it. Don't spend another twenty years dancing around the reasons for infertility or fertility challenges, we know the answer. Have kids when you are younger!


Link for those of you with accounts, I don't know how to gift an article:
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/12/opinion/freeze-sperm-infertility-chemicals.html

I had a baby at 32. Sorry I didn’t live a dcum perfect life where I met my soul mate in college, got engaged at 25-26 and then had a baby before 30. I had no issues getting pregnant and I have a healthy child.

No one here is touting that as the perfect life. The people, like this poster, who push this myth are new arrivals to this site. The are rwnjs doing anything they can to perpetuate the myth that everyone gets married by 26. The poors get married early. The poors almost always end up republicans. This is all part of project 2025. They keep making these same types of posts all pushing the idea that people need to get married young. Go to youtube and listen to how important this is to the rwnj influencers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm just so sick of people encountering infertility in their late 30s and 40s with SURPRISE. This should not be a surprise to ANYONE. Or then complaining about the cost of fertility treatments.

It just seems the absolute height of hubris. That you, and your body, are somehow immune to basic biological processes, that your fertility should wait on YOU and your timeline.

This is...a weird thing to care about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm just so sick of people encountering infertility in their late 30s and 40s with SURPRISE. This should not be a surprise to ANYONE. Or then complaining about the cost of fertility treatments.

It just seems the absolute height of hubris. That you, and your body, are somehow immune to basic biological processes, that your fertility should wait on YOU and your timeline.

Wow, you are unhinged. I know too many women who got pregnant easily past 35.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want people to have babies in their twenties, make college and daycare free and get the housing market sorted out so that most young people can spend less than 50% of their income just on shelter within commuting distance. Until then, having a baby while young is something for the very poor and very wealthy outside of very conservative religious backgrounds.

Social media isn’t helping this. 28 year olds think they are owed a farm kitchen and a pool, not a 30 year old townhouse.

Nah, I think most 28 year olds just want a decent place to live. Your idea that they have champagne tastes is also fueled by social media.

Disagree. My good friend is a realtor. All the 20 somethings want fully updated houses. No honey oak cabinets and bright brass fixtures for them- even if it were very affordable. They’d rather shell out $$$$ for the (cheaply) flipped updated house

Ok please tell me where in the DMV there are affordable starter houses in a safe neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want people to have babies in their twenties, make college and daycare free and get the housing market sorted out so that most young people can spend less than 50% of their income just on shelter within commuting distance. Until then, having a baby while young is something for the very poor and very wealthy outside of very conservative religious backgrounds.

Social media isn’t helping this. 28 year olds think they are owed a farm kitchen and a pool, not a 30 year old townhouse.

Nah, I think most 28 year olds just want a decent place to live. Your idea that they have champagne tastes is also fueled by social media.

Disagree. My good friend is a realtor. All the 20 somethings want fully updated houses. No honey oak cabinets and bright brass fixtures for them- even if it were very affordable. They’d rather shell out $$$$ for the (cheaply) flipped updated house

What a load. 20 somethings are buying and living in townhouses well, well outside the beltway. My spouse and I did the same. Now they just live further from dc or live in an even older townhouse. You and your realtor are liars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those falling for this RWNJ pronatalist fearmongering are a bunch of rubes.

+100

You've also noticed the constant posts trying to normalize younger marriage. They try to be sneaky but it's always the same tired bs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I feel like everyone is trying a little too hard to avoid the true answer to the infertility issues. Have children when you are younger. Even the issues highlighted in this article, and thank you to the author for highlighting the misogynistic tenor of infertility (it's NOT always the woman's fault!), many of which can be avoided by not waiting until your junk is ancient.

I get it, it's hugely inconvenient, you aren't as rich as you imagine you may be in your 30s/40s, you want to party and travel, etc.

I fully respect the choice to be child-free. But if you think you want kids, find a spouse and get on it. Don't spend another twenty years dancing around the reasons for infertility or fertility challenges, we know the answer. Have kids when you are younger!


Link for those of you with accounts, I don't know how to gift an article:
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/12/opinion/freeze-sperm-infertility-chemicals.html

I had a baby at 32. Sorry I didn’t live a dcum perfect life where I met my soul mate in college, got engaged at 25-26 and then had a baby before 30. I had no issues getting pregnant and I have a healthy child.

+1 "Have children when you are younger"! No thanks, I wanted to be happily married before I had kid. We married at 32 and had two healthy babies without fertility issues at 34 and 38.

Stop with the false dichotomy! It's entirely possible to be happily married in your late twenties and have a baby at 30. It's also possible to be happily married for the first time in your mid thirties and have your first child in your late 30's.

I'm just so sick of the old parents claiming that there is "no way" someone who gets married earlier than they did is happy and thriving.

I'm a "older parent" and I can't only think of one couple I know in my generation that got married and had kids before 30 that is still together. And the vast majority of the rest had divorced (or broke up, in the case of the two unmarried couples I can think of) before 30. Maybe they're happy and thriving now, 10+ years on from the end of the relationship, but they sure as heck weren't for a good long time. Watching young marriages with young kids implode convinced me I was absolutely right to wait until I was in my mid-30s before having a kid.

Every single one of my group of friends who got married by 26 is divorced and most of those marriages died in under 5 years. People change so much from age 26-30.

[Anonymous]

DH was infertile at 27, when we (I) started trying. He also resisted treatments, i.e., would not take the meds or supplements, would not visit the doctor. I have my 2 hard-won children now, but I should have married later in life to someone else. I'd spare myself so much grief and tears, and I would probably have had the kids at the same ages I did (30 and 35).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daycare is optional if one parent makes a good (enough) salary and has health insurance. The other parent can stay home.

Buying a house is optional. Rent an apartment (we lived in a one-bedroom until our first was one) instead of buying a house. Only have one car. Don't buy all the fancy baby stuff.

If you don't want to do this, don't. Roll the dice and wait until you are older.

But don't complain that you can't afford to have a child. You just don't want to live cheaply or slightly uncomfortably.

I don't know any men in their 20s that make enough money to provide for a sahm and kids, plus saving to buy a house. DH and I made great salaries by our 30s, but in our 20s we both made like 75k. It was good when combined at 150k, but we couldn't have lived off of 75k total.

There are plenty of stay at home mothers who had their first baby in their 20s. They live all kinds of lives. Some are still in school, some live in a three room apartment, some have a house by age 24. We had our first at 25 years old and the second one at 33 years old. I did not want two kids close together. You try to work out the best you can what you want in life. It doesn’t always follow your ideal timeline, there can be some sacrifices or temporary tough times but you can usually work it out.

We had a lot of financial and childcare help from both our families so that was great. We also help our families. When you’re a stay at home parent you typically meet all of the other stay at home parents. The working parents are practically invisible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daycare is optional if one parent makes a good (enough) salary and has health insurance. The other parent can stay home.

Buying a house is optional. Rent an apartment (we lived in a one-bedroom until our first was one) instead of buying a house. Only have one car. Don't buy all the fancy baby stuff.

If you don't want to do this, don't. Roll the dice and wait until you are older.

But don't complain that you can't afford to have a child. You just don't want to live cheaply or slightly uncomfortably.

So many of us are waiting until we are older and not having any issues at all though. Plus we have a spouse we adore and money to farm out the boring time killers like housecleaning and laundry services.

I had my first at 33 and my last at 43. Many of my close friends and family were similar ages and socio economic status.

If I had rushed to have kids in my 20s I would have ended up divorced and single parenting bc my BF at the time was not a good match for me. Would not have been a good route.

Housekeeping is not boring! I understand if you work all day you don’t want to do housework but I’m at home. I put music on loudly and don’t stop moving for at least an hour at a time. It’s cleaning plus exercise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm just so sick of people encountering infertility in their late 30s and 40s with SURPRISE. This should not be a surprise to ANYONE. Or then complaining about the cost of fertility treatments.

It just seems the absolute height of hubris. That you, and your body, are somehow immune to basic biological processes, that your fertility should wait on YOU and your timeline.

Literally no one is.

+1

Brunch granny BS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I feel like everyone is trying a little too hard to avoid the true answer to the infertility issues. Have children when you are younger. Even the issues highlighted in this article, and thank you to the author for highlighting the misogynistic tenor of infertility (it's NOT always the woman's fault!), many of which can be avoided by not waiting until your junk is ancient.

I get it, it's hugely inconvenient, you aren't as rich as you imagine you may be in your 30s/40s, you want to party and travel, etc.

I fully respect the choice to be child-free. But if you think you want kids, find a spouse and get on it. Don't spend another twenty years dancing around the reasons for infertility or fertility challenges, we know the answer. Have kids when you are younger!


Link for those of you with accounts, I don't know how to gift an article:
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/12/opinion/freeze-sperm-infertility-chemicals.html

I had a baby at 32. Sorry I didn’t live a dcum perfect life where I met my soul mate in college, got engaged at 25-26 and then had a baby before 30. I had no issues getting pregnant and I have a healthy child.

+1 "Have children when you are younger"! No thanks, I wanted to be happily married before I had kid. We married at 32 and had two healthy babies without fertility issues at 34 and 38.

Stop with the false dichotomy! It's entirely possible to be happily married in your late twenties and have a baby at 30. It's also possible to be happily married for the first time in your mid thirties and have your first child in your late 30's.

I'm just so sick of the old parents claiming that there is "no way" someone who gets married earlier than they did is happy and thriving.

I'm a "older parent" and I can't only think of one couple I know in my generation that got married and had kids before 30 that is still together. And the vast majority of the rest had divorced (or broke up, in the case of the two unmarried couples I can think of) before 30. Maybe they're happy and thriving now, 10+ years on from the end of the relationship, but they sure as heck weren't for a good long time. Watching young marriages with young kids implode convinced me I was absolutely right to wait until I was in my mid-30s before having a kid.

I don’t know about all these posts that claim “they don’t know anyone” who does this or does that. If you think hard enough you will realize that you know others who didn’t divorce. Plus there’s a big difference between a 20 year old and a 28 year old.

I knew I wouldn’t marry any guys I dated in college, it was just a fun time, no seriousness. But a year outside of graduation I found the guy I knew was right. My sister met her husband in high school, my other sister met her future husband at 17. They both married in their late 20s and are still married and so am I. There are a million different stories on why some early marriages have worked and some haven’t.

[Anonymous]

Microplastics
High carb diets
Lack of exercise
Obesity
WIFI and other radiation sources that didn't used to exist
Soy and some seed oil products

All contribute to lower sperm counts and lower testosterone counts.

It's all done on purpose also.