I HATE the suburbs and have a chance to leave. This is long..more experienced parents help?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what is wrong with chain restaurants and coffee shops. They have all grown to be chains because what they offered was good.

It’s a lot of the same food - Chili’s is not that different than Applebee’s. But neither has Thai food or (as I ordered tonight from my city home) Pho. If you want fine dining or a menu that doesn’t have a chicken finger option you can’t go to a chain.

Good grief. The best Pho you can get (delivered or pick it up yourself) is in the suburbs of DC. Some of you are insufferable.

I didn't say you can't get Pho in the suburbs. I was responding to someone who asked why people are always knocking on chain restaurants. I think the knock is that they are very similar, not that they are bad, but if you want something different you don't go to a chain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what is wrong with chain restaurants and coffee shops. They have all grown to be chains because what they offered was good.

It’s a lot of the same food - Chili’s is not that different than Applebee’s. But neither has Thai food or (as I ordered tonight from my city home) Pho. If you want fine dining or a menu that doesn’t have a chicken finger option you can’t go to a chain.

Good grief. The best Pho you can get (delivered or pick it up yourself) is in the suburbs of DC. Some of you are insufferable.

I didn't say you can't get Pho in the suburbs. I was responding to someone who asked why people are always knocking on chain restaurants. I think the knock is that they are very similar, not that they are bad, but if you want something different you don't go to a chain.

OP here- as I go through all these comments I realize I just REALLY like being part of my community. Living in the city for the first 26 years of my life I knew our butcher, the local diner owner, the bartenders at the pubs, the neighborhood grandma that owns the Italian deli, the ramen shop owner whose kids were always helping around the restaurant, the owner of the independent book store who gives back SO much to the local kids. I still go back and pop in those places and they ask about my kids, how my parents are, say they remember when I was first allowed to walk to those places with friends, etc. It's nothing like walking into a Chilis, having a bored teen as your waitress, and eating crappy deep fried food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what is wrong with chain restaurants and coffee shops. They have all grown to be chains because what they offered was good.

It’s a lot of the same food - Chili’s is not that different than Applebee’s. But neither has Thai food or (as I ordered tonight from my city home) Pho. If you want fine dining or a menu that doesn’t have a chicken finger option you can’t go to a chain.

Good grief. The best Pho you can get (delivered or pick it up yourself) is in the suburbs of DC. Some of you are insufferable.

I didn't say you can't get Pho in the suburbs. I was responding to someone who asked why people are always knocking on chain restaurants. I think the knock is that they are very similar, not that they are bad, but if you want something different you don't go to a chain.

DP chiming in here ...I'm the PP who is happy, for many reasons, with her move from Lakeview to the Northshore suburbs. And, yes, we have found a handful of decent (and a few really good) restaurants out here. But, come on, the restaurant scene in Chicago (at all different price points and for all different cuisines) is on a stratospherically better level. I certainly miss it! You are just not going to win this argument ...

[Anonymous]

As someone who lives in the city, I find being a “city person” sort or laughable, especially if you have kids. Who cares at some point? Are you really going to a lot of killer restaurant and bars if you have kids? Even if you are, isn’t there a point in your life where that all starts to seem a bit shallow? I would stay where you are. Frankly, op, you sound a bit childish to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what is wrong with chain restaurants and coffee shops. They have all grown to be chains because what they offered was good.

It’s a lot of the same food - Chili’s is not that different than Applebee’s. But neither has Thai food or (as I ordered tonight from my city home) Pho. If you want fine dining or a menu that doesn’t have a chicken finger option you can’t go to a chain.

Good grief. The best Pho you can get (delivered or pick it up yourself) is in the suburbs of DC. Some of you are insufferable.

I didn't say you can't get Pho in the suburbs. I was responding to someone who asked why people are always knocking on chain restaurants. I think the knock is that they are very similar, not that they are bad, but if you want something different you don't go to a chain.

OP here- as I go through all these comments I realize I just REALLY like being part of my community. Living in the city for the first 26 years of my life I knew our butcher, the local diner owner, the bartenders at the pubs, the neighborhood grandma that owns the Italian deli, the ramen shop owner whose kids were always helping around the restaurant, the owner of the independent book store who gives back SO much to the local kids. I still go back and pop in those places and they ask about my kids, how my parents are, say they remember when I was first allowed to walk to those places with friends, etc. It's nothing like walking into a Chilis, having a bored teen as your waitress, and eating crappy deep fried food.

PP from Chicago here (the one with the 11-year-old) - North Side of Chicago is like a small town. Everywhere we go we run into families we know. I'm sure it's like this on the south and west sides too but I don't live there so can't say.

There are really diverse communities in Chicago suburbs and some great restaurants. Not sure I would put Mount Prospect in the category for either, though!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what is wrong with chain restaurants and coffee shops. They have all grown to be chains because what they offered was good.

It’s a lot of the same food - Chili’s is not that different than Applebee’s. But neither has Thai food or (as I ordered tonight from my city home) Pho. If you want fine dining or a menu that doesn’t have a chicken finger option you can’t go to a chain.

Good grief. The best Pho you can get (delivered or pick it up yourself) is in the suburbs of DC. Some of you are insufferable.

I didn't say you can't get Pho in the suburbs. I was responding to someone who asked why people are always knocking on chain restaurants. I think the knock is that they are very similar, not that they are bad, but if you want something different you don't go to a chain.

OP here- as I go through all these comments I realize I just REALLY like being part of my community. Living in the city for the first 26 years of my life I knew our butcher, the local diner owner, the bartenders at the pubs, the neighborhood grandma that owns the Italian deli, the ramen shop owner whose kids were always helping around the restaurant, the owner of the independent book store who gives back SO much to the local kids. I still go back and pop in those places and they ask about my kids, how my parents are, say they remember when I was first allowed to walk to those places with friends, etc. It's nothing like walking into a Chilis, having a bored teen as your waitress, and eating crappy deep fried food.

I can really relate to this, OP. I'm a PP with 2 kids sharing a small room who is OK getting groceries in the rain. Sticking it out in our tiny apartment in the city through Covid had me grateful for our life here. Despite family offering us considerable space in the suburbs 20 miles away, we never considered it. I came to really appreciate these small but meaningful relationships in my community and it enriches my life. I am not suggesting that you can't get that elsewhere or that people who live in the suburbs lack meaningful relationships, but the dynamics you describe above feel so familiar, and if you feel like you're missing those where you are AND could slot right back into them now, why wouldn't you do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone who lives in the city, I find being a “city person” sort or laughable, especially if you have kids. Who cares at some point? Are you really going to a lot of killer restaurant and bars if you have kids? Even if you are, isn’t there a point in your life where that all starts to seem a bit shallow? I would stay where you are. Frankly, op, you sound a bit childish to me.

No, you don't go to the killer restaurants and bars but you are able to take your kids to world class museums, theater, diverse schools, high-quality extra curricurlers, etc without having to drive everywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who lives in the city, I find being a “city person” sort or laughable, especially if you have kids. Who cares at some point? Are you really going to a lot of killer restaurant and bars if you have kids? Even if you are, isn’t there a point in your life where that all starts to seem a bit shallow? I would stay where you are. Frankly, op, you sound a bit childish to me.

No, you don't go to the killer restaurants and bars but you are able to take your kids to world class museums, theater, diverse schools, high-quality extra curricurlers, etc without having to drive everywhere.

as someone who lives in the city, being "a city person" does in fact mean going to lots of restaurants and bars with my kids. Our street closes to cars on the weekend half the year and restaurants set their tables up outside and the kids are biking and chalking and bumping into friends while we're hanging out, eating, listening to live music, etc. This is all happening like 800 feet from my apartment. Our life feels rich, spontaneous, and healthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who lives in the city, I find being a “city person” sort or laughable, especially if you have kids. Who cares at some point? Are you really going to a lot of killer restaurant and bars if you have kids? Even if you are, isn’t there a point in your life where that all starts to seem a bit shallow? I would stay where you are. Frankly, op, you sound a bit childish to me.

No, you don't go to the killer restaurants and bars but you are able to take your kids to world class museums, theater, diverse schools, high-quality extra curricurlers, etc without having to drive everywhere.

as someone who lives in the city, being "a city person" does in fact mean going to lots of restaurants and bars with my kids. Our street closes to cars on the weekend half the year and restaurants set their tables up outside and the kids are biking and chalking and bumping into friends while we're hanging out, eating, listening to live music, etc. This is all happening like 800 feet from my apartment. Our life feels rich, spontaneous, and healthy.

Stop bragging!! lol This sounds so nice like somewhere European frankly not the suburbs where we are all isolated in our large McMansions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who lives in the city, I find being a “city person” sort or laughable, especially if you have kids. Who cares at some point? Are you really going to a lot of killer restaurant and bars if you have kids? Even if you are, isn’t there a point in your life where that all starts to seem a bit shallow? I would stay where you are. Frankly, op, you sound a bit childish to me.

No, you don't go to the killer restaurants and bars but you are able to take your kids to world class museums, theater, diverse schools, high-quality extra curricurlers, etc without having to drive everywhere.

as someone who lives in the city, being "a city person" does in fact mean going to lots of restaurants and bars with my kids. Our street closes to cars on the weekend half the year and restaurants set their tables up outside and the kids are biking and chalking and bumping into friends while we're hanging out, eating, listening to live music, etc. This is all happening like 800 feet from my apartment. Our life feels rich, spontaneous, and healthy.

Aww, I used to live around the corner from Southport Ave. in Chicago, which did this every other weekend in the summer when the Cubs were out of town. It was the best! We'd always eat outside at this great Argentinian restaurant (can't remember the name, but the sangria was goooooood) or Coalfire Pizza. There was this DJ with a bubble machine that my littlest one loved, and tons of kids on scooters and bikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who lives in the city, I find being a “city person” sort or laughable, especially if you have kids. Who cares at some point? Are you really going to a lot of killer restaurant and bars if you have kids? Even if you are, isn’t there a point in your life where that all starts to seem a bit shallow? I would stay where you are. Frankly, op, you sound a bit childish to me.

No, you don't go to the killer restaurants and bars but you are able to take your kids to world class museums, theater, diverse schools, high-quality extra curricurlers, etc without having to drive everywhere.

as someone who lives in the city, being "a city person" does in fact mean going to lots of restaurants and bars with my kids. Our street closes to cars on the weekend half the year and restaurants set their tables up outside and the kids are biking and chalking and bumping into friends while we're hanging out, eating, listening to live music, etc. This is all happening like 800 feet from my apartment. Our life feels rich, spontaneous, and healthy.

Stop bragging!! lol This sounds so nice like somewhere European frankly not the suburbs where we are all isolated in our large McMansions.

As the PP you're replying to, despite my love of our open streets, I'm ready to move to Chicago after reading this thread!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who lives in the city, I find being a “city person” sort or laughable, especially if you have kids. Who cares at some point? Are you really going to a lot of killer restaurant and bars if you have kids? Even if you are, isn’t there a point in your life where that all starts to seem a bit shallow? I would stay where you are. Frankly, op, you sound a bit childish to me.

No, you don't go to the killer restaurants and bars but you are able to take your kids to world class museums, theater, diverse schools, high-quality extra curricurlers, etc without having to drive everywhere.

NYC is probably the only US city with extra curriculars that does not require driving.

Museums get old. After the age of 9 your kids won’t want to hand at Smithsonian museums. I wouldn’t want to take the metro there on the weekend with kids and crime that has been going on.

There is theatre in all large cities and most suburbs/towns. Most people don’t go to the theatre weekly when they have kids.

Most cities don’t have diverse schools. They have schools with poor minority kids and then private schools or magnets for wealthy whites.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what is wrong with chain restaurants and coffee shops. They have all grown to be chains because what they offered was good.

It’s a lot of the same food - Chili’s is not that different than Applebee’s. But neither has Thai food or (as I ordered tonight from my city home) Pho. If you want fine dining or a menu that doesn’t have a chicken finger option you can’t go to a chain.

Good grief. The best Pho you can get (delivered or pick it up yourself) is in the suburbs of DC. Some of you are insufferable.

I didn't say you can't get Pho in the suburbs. I was responding to someone who asked why people are always knocking on chain restaurants. I think the knock is that they are very similar, not that they are bad, but if you want something different you don't go to a chain.

OP here- as I go through all these comments I realize I just REALLY like being part of my community. Living in the city for the first 26 years of my life I knew our butcher, the local diner owner, the bartenders at the pubs, the neighborhood grandma that owns the Italian deli, the ramen shop owner whose kids were always helping around the restaurant, the owner of the independent book store who gives back SO much to the local kids. I still go back and pop in those places and they ask about my kids, how my parents are, say they remember when I was first allowed to walk to those places with friends, etc. It's nothing like walking into a Chilis, having a bored teen as your waitress, and eating crappy deep fried food.

This isn’t unique to living in a city. It’s unique to NOT living in a soulless suburb.

I live in a small town and have a local butcher, farmers market, can walk/bike to parks, an independent book store where we always buy kid birthday parties, etc. No chains since they aren’t allowed. Actually we do have a CVS and that was controversial.

I do find city people a bit delusional about chains. They eat at sweetgreen and can’t understand that it’s a chain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:(1) How's the middle school in the city? You're right that many urban elementaries are good to great, and there are many application options for high school, but the choke point is often middle school. That said, if you're saving money, private may be an option for middle and high school.

(2) How small is SMALL? Under 1,000sq or over? If you're comparing it to a sprawling 5 bedroom suburban house, then it may feel small but actually be a perfectly livable size for many city dwellers. 2 bedrooms + den sounds like it would be big enough for me, particularly since you have the den to use as a second kid bedroom if they don't like sharing and because you have your grandparents' unit to spill into.

(3) Instead of selling, could you rent out your current house? That way you hold onto your interest rate and have the ability to move back if the city life doesn't work out. I would tell you to sell and go if rates were lower, but you are absolutely right that you may be shooting yourself in the foot if you'll have to move in the next 5-10 years because of schools or the house being sold.

Do not worry about moving your older child more than once. She's still SO young that she'll forget in a few months max (mine switched between pre-K4 and K, and by 1st grade could not remember any of the kids she went to two years of pre-K with even though we ran into them occasionally). And it's totally different to switch school locations with your entire grade than move school districts.

Thanks so much for all the thoughts! The school across the street is actually PreK through 8th grade so no worrying about middle school.

I think the apartment is 1400sqft. It was actually the butler and maids quarters in the original house

Oh my gosh, do it! We stayed in the city with our kids and I love everything about it. Our 10 year old is right on the verge of having a LOT of independence (taking metro and busses).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what is wrong with chain restaurants and coffee shops. They have all grown to be chains because what they offered was good.

It’s a lot of the same food - Chili’s is not that different than Applebee’s. But neither has Thai food or (as I ordered tonight from my city home) Pho. If you want fine dining or a menu that doesn’t have a chicken finger option you can’t go to a chain.

Good grief. The best Pho you can get (delivered or pick it up yourself) is in the suburbs of DC. Some of you are insufferable.

I didn't say you can't get Pho in the suburbs. I was responding to someone who asked why people are always knocking on chain restaurants. I think the knock is that they are very similar, not that they are bad, but if you want something different you don't go to a chain.

OP here- as I go through all these comments I realize I just REALLY like being part of my community. Living in the city for the first 26 years of my life I knew our butcher, the local diner owner, the bartenders at the pubs, the neighborhood grandma that owns the Italian deli, the ramen shop owner whose kids were always helping around the restaurant, the owner of the independent book store who gives back SO much to the local kids. I still go back and pop in those places and they ask about my kids, how my parents are, say they remember when I was first allowed to walk to those places with friends, etc. It's nothing like walking into a Chilis, having a bored teen as your waitress, and eating crappy deep fried food.

This isn’t unique to living in a city. It’s unique to NOT living in a soulless suburb.

I live in a small town and have a local butcher, farmers market, can walk/bike to parks, an independent book store where we always buy kid birthday parties, etc. No chains since they aren’t allowed. Actually we do have a CVS and that was controversial.

I do find city people a bit delusional about chains. They eat at sweetgreen and can’t understand that it’s a chain.

This isn't meant to be a city vs suburb debate. OP has a real decision to make about an actual piece of property in a neighborhood that she's lived in, in a building where her grandparents still live. Sure if that wasn't an option she could and should consider a wide variety of potential new neighborhoods, but in her reply above she's citing actual places that she knows and would be returning to.