Do you drink alcohol while ToTing with your kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm not an alcoholic though.

What's it like in your black and white world?

It's great. I am capable of spending an hour walking my kid around the neighborhood and then enjoying a glass of wine at home, without needing to carry a little "mommy juice" around with me while I make a nice memory with my kid.

I'm sorry that you can't do normal parenting activities without alcohol. That sounds difficult.

So your kids are so awful that you need to find solace in a glass of wine at the end of the night after spending an hour with them? I am sorry you are such a bad parent that you can't take your kids ToTing without having to drink way your troubles with "mommy juice" at the end of the night.

I had the same thought! She’s still drinking yet trying to frame it in a way that makes her look superior. Gave me a good chuckle.

You both sound defensive. No one said drinking is wrong, but why do you need to drink WHILE trick or treating with your kids? What is so hard about walking around the neighborhood for a little while that you feel you need that?

I don't have kids yet, so I don't have a dog in this race, but why do you assume people drink because something is hard? I usually drink when something is fun and I want it to be even a little more fun. A picnic is fun, but a boozy picnic is even more fun. A sporting event is fun, but a sporting event with beer is even more fun.

It’s because there is a group of people on DCUM who are extremely prim and uptight.

I have zero issue with people who don’t drink, for whatever reason. But I can’t stand it when people look down their noses at others just for living their lives differently.

[Anonymous]

I really feel like some neighbors feel left out and they want to convince themselves that there is something torrid going on to feel less left out, like I'm not even interested in doing that, but they are.

Then ff to kids being in middle school and these families that have gotten together for 10 years have kids trick or treating together then they complain their kid is "left out".

Either join or don't but get over it. There is nothing magical about the weekend, you can socialize on a Tuesday night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm not an alcoholic though.

What's it like in your black and white world?

It's great. I am capable of spending an hour walking my kid around the neighborhood and then enjoying a glass of wine at home, without needing to carry a little "mommy juice" around with me while I make a nice memory with my kid.

I'm sorry that you can't do normal parenting activities without alcohol. That sounds difficult.

So your kids are so awful that you need to find solace in a glass of wine at the end of the night after spending an hour with them? I am sorry you are such a bad parent that you can't take your kids ToTing without having to drink way your troubles with "mommy juice" at the end of the night.

I had the same thought! She’s still drinking yet trying to frame it in a way that makes her look superior. Gave me a good chuckle.

You both sound defensive. No one said drinking is wrong, but why do you need to drink WHILE trick or treating with your kids? What is so hard about walking around the neighborhood for a little while that you feel you need that?

Because whether you have a glass of wine during the event or immediately after is the SAME THING.

I mean, this is not correct.

I sometimes have a glass of wine when I get home from work. This is not the same thing as having a glass of wine at my desk at work.

But you still have to parent after trick or treating.

Not really. Once my kids are in bed, my parenting duties are pretty minimal. Certainly more minimal than they are while out trick or treating.

Not really. There could still be an emergency. Sickness. A fire. Some reason you’d need to drive. My point is that a drink or two over the course of an evening does not impair most adults to the point where they cannot perform basic parenting tasks. Including while walking around outside.

My kids are much safer at home in their beds than running around the neighborhood at night. Plus the sort of emergency that is likely to come up at night when my kid is in bed is not likely to require the same reflexes and thinking as, say, my kid dashing into the street to say hi to a friend without checking for traffic.

But really, I just don't want to walk around drinking. To me that's a sitting activity. I also have never understood bar crawls or the desire to carry a beer around the French quarter.

Walking and drinking is for hobos.

Nice classism there, when you're the one who apparently lives in a dangerous neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

Yup. A hot cider with fireball.

Like others have said, nobody is getting wasted and everyone is staying sober.

Its just a little fun

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm not an alcoholic though.

What's it like in your black and white world?

It's great. I am capable of spending an hour walking my kid around the neighborhood and then enjoying a glass of wine at home, without needing to carry a little "mommy juice" around with me while I make a nice memory with my kid.

I'm sorry that you can't do normal parenting activities without alcohol. That sounds difficult.

So your kids are so awful that you need to find solace in a glass of wine at the end of the night after spending an hour with them? I am sorry you are such a bad parent that you can't take your kids ToTing without having to drink way your troubles with "mommy juice" at the end of the night.

I had the same thought! She’s still drinking yet trying to frame it in a way that makes her look superior. Gave me a good chuckle.

You both sound defensive. No one said drinking is wrong, but why do you need to drink WHILE trick or treating with your kids? What is so hard about walking around the neighborhood for a little while that you feel you need that?

I don't have kids yet, so I don't have a dog in this race, but why do you assume people drink because something is hard? I usually drink when something is fun and I want it to be even a little more fun. A picnic is fun, but a boozy picnic is even more fun. A sporting event is fun, but a sporting event with beer is even more fun.

Lots of children of alcoholics don't understand that.

[Anonymous]

Obsession with alcohol tiers on DCUM:

3. Moderate drinkers
2. People with actual drinking problems
1. Tee totalers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm not an alcoholic though.

What's it like in your black and white world?

It's great. I am capable of spending an hour walking my kid around the neighborhood and then enjoying a glass of wine at home, without needing to carry a little "mommy juice" around with me while I make a nice memory with my kid.

I'm sorry that you can't do normal parenting activities without alcohol. That sounds difficult.

So your kids are so awful that you need to find solace in a glass of wine at the end of the night after spending an hour with them? I am sorry you are such a bad parent that you can't take your kids ToTing without having to drink way your troubles with "mommy juice" at the end of the night.

I had the same thought! She’s still drinking yet trying to frame it in a way that makes her look superior. Gave me a good chuckle.

You both sound defensive. No one said drinking is wrong, but why do you need to drink WHILE trick or treating with your kids? What is so hard about walking around the neighborhood for a little while that you feel you need that?

I don't have kids yet, so I don't have a dog in this race, but why do you assume people drink because something is hard? I usually drink when something is fun and I want it to be even a little more fun. A picnic is fun, but a boozy picnic is even more fun. A sporting event is fun, but a sporting event with beer is even more fun.

It’s because there is a group of people on DCUM who are extremely prim and uptight.

I have zero issue with people who don’t drink, for whatever reason. But I can’t stand it when people look down their noses at others just for living their lives differently.

They equate booze with medicine. Like, you only take tylenol when you have a headache. Or sudafed when you have a cold. Their mindset is that you only drink alcohol when times are tough

But with most other people (or people that have a healthy relationship with alcohol), it can be the opposite. When I'm going through something tough at work or in my personal life, I usually drink less. I have found that sometimes I indulge with a Dr. Pepper at work when its a tough day, but that's about the extent of it. Lol

You don't have mid day beers at work. You have mid day beers at the beach on vacation.

Those pearl clutchers have it backwards

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do a spiked hot coffee or cider drink.

I thought I’d carry on my mom's 1970s tradition of handing out hot cider to adults on Halloween. I did it Halloween 2003 when we moved to our current dcumlandia suburban neighborhood. Never again because every other parent asked if it was spiked/refused or held up a cup saying they already had their boozy beverage!

An adjacent court puts up cones at dusk. The parents gather to pre party with a keg. By the time actual ToT begins, one semi drunk dad stands over each residents’ huge bowl of candy lined up in from of the cones and instructs TOTers not to go any further, “jusstake shumcandees frumeach boll.”

I'm confused. Was your cider spiked with alcohol? Or were parents wishing it was spiked? Cider is normally spiked for adults. Grocery stores sell cider that's non alcoholic for kids, but it's more like spiced apple juice.

Hot apple cider is a delicious fall drink for people of all ages. I always get it at the pumpkin patch. It never has alcohols. Sure, you could spike it and I would definitely ask in this situation but apple cider is not a "children's drink". This sounds like a lovely tradition but I do see a lot of people carrying around mugs so I understand why she didn't have a lot of takers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do a spiked hot coffee or cider drink.

I thought I’d carry on my mom's 1970s tradition of handing out hot cider to adults on Halloween. I did it Halloween 2003 when we moved to our current dcumlandia suburban neighborhood. Never again because every other parent asked if it was spiked/refused or held up a cup saying they already had their boozy beverage!

An adjacent court puts up cones at dusk. The parents gather to pre party with a keg. By the time actual ToT begins, one semi drunk dad stands over each residents’ huge bowl of candy lined up in from of the cones and instructs TOTers not to go any further, “jusstake shumcandees frumeach boll.”

I'm confused. Was your cider spiked with alcohol? Or were parents wishing it was spiked? Cider is normally spiked for adults. Grocery stores sell cider that's non alcoholic for kids, but it's more like spiced apple juice.

Hot apple cider is a delicious fall drink for people of all ages. I always get it at the pumpkin patch. It never has alcohols. Sure, you could spike it and I would definitely ask in this situation but apple cider is not a "children's drink". This sounds like a lovely tradition but I do see a lot of people carrying around mugs so I understand why she didn't have a lot of takers.

I find it far too sweet to drink it straight.

[Anonymous]

I honestly think this attitude is part of why parenting in the U.S. is so much harder than it is in some other countries. We are slaves to our children and feel guilty when we don’t make things entirely about them. I legitimately don’t think it’s healthy for kids to live and see their parents living this way. It’s not really about alcohol but more about the idea that if you don’t make holidays and vacations entirely about children you’re a selfish, bad parent.

Have any of you ever spent Christmas in the UK? The whole season has more of a festive vibe because adults are allowed to enjoy it, go to pubs with friends, have parties and enjoy activities too. The season isn’t 100% about Santa and Christmas morning with children.

I say all this as a parent who only socially drinks sometimes. But I think it’s important to include kids in our real lives and not be so weird and puritanical about alcohol. Drinking does not have to mean getting drunk.

I actually think the focus on alcohol for parents on Halloween is a symptom of our weird relationship with parenting and alcohol, not a break from it. Like only in the US would you have a whole thread dedicated to asking parents if they planned to drink alcohol while trick or treating. Or making a big deal about how the parents "let loose" on Halloween since they aren't allowed to other times.

It's that juxtaposition specifically that is unhealthy. In countries where parents are not required to sacrifice every ounce of their being at the altar of parenting, people also don't make such a big deal about something like drinking at a holiday party. I agree with you that Americans are too extreme about their expectations of parents, but I also think running around doing jello shots during trick or treating is the extreme counter-reaction. A more moderate approach on both ends would be healthier for everyone.

Good points. Some of these posts really reveal that poster's relationship with alcohol. If you get inebriated every time you drink, you assume everyone does. If you can moderate or stop at one drink, you don't mind alcohol being available.

+2

[Anonymous]

I have some years, other not. I'm not opposed but actually find it a little cumbersome to manage an open container and little kids simultaneously, while on foot. Someone inevitably ends up crying, needing picked up, helped up/down steps, has extra candy or costume accessories to be carried, etc. Now that my youngest is out of toddlerhood, maybe it will be more feasible.

[Anonymous]

I don’t usually walk around with a beverage, though some neighbors do. At the end of trick or treating, a few families/friends with kids close in age usually gather at one house and the parents will have a beer and chat while the kids trade candies. It’s always a fun night in our neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

I don't have kids yet, so I don't have a dog in this race, but why do you assume people drink because something is hard? I usually drink when something is fun and I want it to be even a little more fun. A picnic is fun, but a boozy picnic is even more fun. A sporting event is fun, but a sporting event with beer is even more fun.

Lots of children of alcoholics don't understand that.

My mom was an adult child of an alcoholic and she was a teetotaler. Her understanding of alcohol was that it was very dangerous, caused violence and complete lack of self-control, and probably began with someone who "needed to just take the edge off". She used that phrase a lot, like that was sort of the only entry point was as a coping mechanism for hard days. She couldn't understand me having one or two drinks in a celebratory situation. It was all the beginning of the end in her mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, because I can both have a drink and be a responsible parent. Are we doing shots? No. Are we getting drunk? Also no.

I don't drink very often (maybe once a month?) but Halloween is a social activity in our neighborhood and we will often drink while out with the kids.

Some people in the thread have talked about doing shots, or giving away shots as a "treat" to other parents.

I was at a fall flower festival, and I met some people, and they had pumpkin spice shots. I did one. I'm wild like that.

Nasty

[Anonymous]

only moonbat daughters in law drink liquor while pretending to watch their kids on the back of a golf cart
that would include my husband's DIL. The one who needs a cart in case she needs to go potty.
I'm sorry God. I just can't help myself sometimes. I will try harder in the future.