What is the defining trauma of your life?

[Anonymous]

I associate “prank” families with lesser-educated poor people. Maybe I’m stereotyping?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom locked me in a basement and held the door while my aunts and uncles pounded on the door, yelled help, and pretended to break in through a tiny basement window. I was 7 or 8. I thought my extended family (mom, at least 5 aunts and uncles, sister, 2 cousins) was being murdered or something terrible and I was either next or the only one left. Then instead of apologizing, they made fun of me for not realizing it was a joke. Even as an adult, they’d make fun of me for my response because I cried.

Absolutely horrible

+1. This is so incredibly cruel, and from your family too. I'm so sorry.

It's not just cruel, it's weird and odd of a thing to do. I don't get it. Almost to the point where I feel like, could they be saying that to reassure you/lie/protect you from someting that really was indeed happening? but they still tease you which is really weird

We are a 'prank' family. I definitely remember tears at times as a kid. I didn't like it. We have them in our family, but I waited for the kids to be school aged before we did any and now we keep it friendly/fun, but if anyone gets upset - we stop immediately. Fingers-crossed this works to mitigate any cruelty. We are still in ES, so we will see.

Why though? Why not not mitigate any cruelty by not being a prank family?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom locked me in a basement and held the door while my aunts and uncles pounded on the door, yelled help, and pretended to break in through a tiny basement window. I was 7 or 8. I thought my extended family (mom, at least 5 aunts and uncles, sister, 2 cousins) was being murdered or something terrible and I was either next or the only one left. Then instead of apologizing, they made fun of me for not realizing it was a joke. Even as an adult, they’d make fun of me for my response because I cried.

Absolutely horrible

+1. This is so incredibly cruel, and from your family too. I'm so sorry.

It's not just cruel, it's weird and odd of a thing to do. I don't get it. Almost to the point where I feel like, could they be saying that to reassure you/lie/protect you from someting that really was indeed happening? but they still tease you which is really weird

We are a 'prank' family. I definitely remember tears at times as a kid. I didn't like it. We have them in our family, but I waited for the kids to be school aged before we did any and now we keep it friendly/fun, but if anyone gets upset - we stop immediately. Fingers-crossed this works to mitigate any cruelty. We are still in ES, so we will see.

Why though? Why not not mitigate any cruelty by not being a prank family?

Idiotic practice that preys on the trusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom locked me in a basement and held the door while my aunts and uncles pounded on the door, yelled help, and pretended to break in through a tiny basement window. I was 7 or 8. I thought my extended family (mom, at least 5 aunts and uncles, sister, 2 cousins) was being murdered or something terrible and I was either next or the only one left. Then instead of apologizing, they made fun of me for not realizing it was a joke. Even as an adult, they’d make fun of me for my response because I cried.

Absolutely horrible

+1. This is so incredibly cruel, and from your family too. I'm so sorry.

It's not just cruel, it's weird and odd of a thing to do. I don't get it. Almost to the point where I feel like, could they be saying that to reassure you/lie/protect you from someting that really was indeed happening? but they still tease you which is really weird

We are a 'prank' family. I definitely remember tears at times as a kid. I didn't like it. We have them in our family, but I waited for the kids to be school aged before we did any and now we keep it friendly/fun, but if anyone gets upset - we stop immediately. Fingers-crossed this works to mitigate any cruelty. We are still in ES, so we will see.

Pranks are stupid and erode trust even is the pranks aren't cruel. Honestly, just grow up and stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Childhood sexual abuse

Childhood illness where I nearly died

Murder

Another murder

TBI

Married a narcissist that eventually raped me

Kids with special needs

IEP meetings

Autoimmune disease that took nearly 20 years to diagnose while doctors told me it was all in my head. I’ve been sick for so long.

It's "who" not "that" when you refer to a person. "That" is for objects, "who" is for people.

np This is not the time to correct someone's grammer!

Congratulations. It's GRAMMAR

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cancer. Total loss of medical innocence. Every ache and pain is now a reason to worry. Life feels like a countdown until recurrence now.

Hugs, PP.

I feel this in my bones, with my father’s cancer. He is screened every other year, and the weeks leading up to the day are daunting. I dread the day of, waiting by the phone for my mom to call and tell me his fate. It’s a nightmare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Childhood sexual abuse

Childhood illness where I nearly died

Murder

Another murder

TBI

Married a narcissist that eventually raped me

Kids with special needs

IEP meetings

Autoimmune disease that took nearly 20 years to diagnose while doctors told me it was all in my head. I’ve been sick for so long.

It's "who" not "that" when you refer to a person. "That" is for objects, "who" is for people.

That's your takeaway? I'm concerned about your reading comprehension skills.

[Anonymous]

When one of my closest friends died on 9/11. I've had a pretty easy life overall, and I know it, but that was really, really hard for me.

[Anonymous]

My son's mental illness has been an ongoing trauma for me. It's exhausting, and I have done everything I could think of to try to help him - but none of it has been very effective. He's a teenager, and I am terrified about what will happen when he is a legal adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Welp, I’ll just see myself out with what I previously thought was traumatic…

Likewise

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom locked me in a basement and held the door while my aunts and uncles pounded on the door, yelled help, and pretended to break in through a tiny basement window. I was 7 or 8. I thought my extended family (mom, at least 5 aunts and uncles, sister, 2 cousins) was being murdered or something terrible and I was either next or the only one left. Then instead of apologizing, they made fun of me for not realizing it was a joke. Even as an adult, they’d make fun of me for my response because I cried.

Absolutely horrible

+1. This is so incredibly cruel, and from your family too. I'm so sorry.

It's not just cruel, it's weird and odd of a thing to do. I don't get it. Almost to the point where I feel like, could they be saying that to reassure you/lie/protect you from someting that really was indeed happening? but they still tease you which is really weird

We are a 'prank' family. I definitely remember tears at times as a kid. I didn't like it. We have them in our family, but I waited for the kids to be school aged before we did any and now we keep it friendly/fun, but if anyone gets upset - we stop immediately. Fingers-crossed this works to mitigate any cruelty. We are still in ES, so we will see.

Why not just…. Not do pranks???
Every year my mom would randomly tell me it was a snow day if I came downstairs in the morning in winter. And then when I ran to the window she’d be like “just kidding!!! But I did make you pancakes!” It makes me so angry just thinking about it. I don’t understand why anyone thinks this sort of thing is funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom locked me in a basement and held the door while my aunts and uncles pounded on the door, yelled help, and pretended to break in through a tiny basement window. I was 7 or 8. I thought my extended family (mom, at least 5 aunts and uncles, sister, 2 cousins) was being murdered or something terrible and I was either next or the only one left. Then instead of apologizing, they made fun of me for not realizing it was a joke. Even as an adult, they’d make fun of me for my response because I cried.

Absolutely horrible

+1. This is so incredibly cruel, and from your family too. I'm so sorry.

It's not just cruel, it's weird and odd of a thing to do. I don't get it. Almost to the point where I feel like, could they be saying that to reassure you/lie/protect you from someting that really was indeed happening? but they still tease you which is really weird

We are a 'prank' family. I definitely remember tears at times as a kid. I didn't like it. We have them in our family, but I waited for the kids to be school aged before we did any and now we keep it friendly/fun, but if anyone gets upset - we stop immediately. Fingers-crossed this works to mitigate any cruelty. We are still in ES, so we will see.

Why though? Why not not mitigate any cruelty by not being a prank family?

Idiotic practice that preys on the trusting.

Exactly this. Preys on kids for being trusting. Or, as the prankers say, “gullible”. Why would you ever do that to your children.

[Anonymous]

My mentally ill sibling's constant need for attention - their many challenges in life made it so my parents had very little time for me after dealing with her issues. They spent all resources on this sibling, who in the end is a narcissist who stopped talking to almost everyone in our family.

Losing the person whom I thought I would marry to suicide. I am not sure I trust myself to find the right person and maybe I am irretrievably broken.

[Anonymous]

2 of my closest friends died at young ages, both very unexpected (one was suicide at age 21 but no one knew how depressed she was/she seemed happy to even close family/friends; one was a brain aneurysm at age 25)

[Anonymous]

Multiple traumas, but the one that has been defining has been having a toxic narcissist mother. No amount of therapy completely overcomes the impact of being neglected and abused by a parent who is incapable of love.