APS looking to make sex Ed coed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine was co-ed at a Catholic school in the 80s. We only had 12 kids in our class and not enough faculty to break it up. Started in 4th grade with puberty stuff.

Pretty sure I am not scarred by anything except the "sex will kill you and send you to hell if you do it before marriage" lessons.

I’ll take “Things that Never Happened” for $1000, Mayim.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want your child educated to your faith's beliefs, send them to parochial school. If you want your child educated in single sex classrooms, enroll them in a single sex private school. Otherwise, children should all receive the same instruction in a coeducational setting.

I cannot stress this enough. Lately, public schools are catering more and more to the extremely religious. They all need to develop a backbone and strongly recommend religious schools, and make it clear they will not bend over backwards and change everything for a child who should not be in public education, and I don’t care if it is about a naked David statue, or a full face and head covering for little girls.

Can we focus on Arlington?the existing policy is for sex segregated. APS wants to change that. Not sure why because they haven’t said. Parents are asking to stick with the current policy.

No one is catering to the “extremely religious” here. In fact, APS is trying to sneak this change through in summer with the barest minimum of public engagement. What do teachers think of this policy? Parents beyond DCUM? Students?

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think anyone who is uncomfortable with this to the point of opting out isn’t already opting out

I know people who didn’t opt out of sex ed for their older kids that are considering opting out for their younger ones.

In APS? This is very hard to believe.

Perhaps you don’t interact with many families. There are a lot of immigrant families in Arlington that are more conservative when it comes to these issues.

I interact with many families which is why I find this very hard to believe. Which school?

Lol I’m an example. I’m an immigrant. Come from a westernized family but I’m Arab and Muslim. Not particularly religious - don’t pray but do fast because I view Ramadan as a cultural thing. I don’t cover my hair. Wear shorts (though not short shorts) and vote democrat. I am, like many Arabs and Muslim friends that I have, very uncomfortable with the idea of mixed gender sex education. I never considered opting my girls out of sex education but I am now wondering why on earth Arlington is pushing this and find it quite absurd. People may not share their opinions with you cuz we immigrants tend to only share our thoughts on these cultural issues with other immigrants. Trust me, if there is a recent immigrant you know that has told you that they are ok with this, they are either lying to you or in the minority. Yes I’m generalizing but I feel very comfortable making this generalization.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want your child educated to your faith's beliefs, send them to parochial school. If you want your child educated in single sex classrooms, enroll them in a single sex private school. Otherwise, children should all receive the same instruction in a coeducational setting.

I cannot stress this enough. Lately, public schools are catering more and more to the extremely religious. They all need to develop a backbone and strongly recommend religious schools, and make it clear they will not bend over backwards and change everything for a child who should not be in public education, and I don’t care if it is about a naked David statue, or a full face and head covering for little girls.

Do you think locker rooms should be co-Ed? Should all sports be co-ed? Where would you draw the line? I’m just curious, not trying to pick apart your argument. Although to be Frank, I don’t think single-sex sex-ed is a “new” thing coming from the religious right. This feels like a leap.

[Anonymous]

Help me understand how this is a religious/values issue?
I can totally understand (and maybe even agree with) the argument to keep them single sex in 4th/5th mostly for the sake of girls who may have genuine logistical issues about their period that they're embarrassed to ask in front of boys.

But how does having a boy in class while your girl is taught the exact same issue change anything regarding the content from your religious point of view? I'm very confused by that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Help me understand how this is a religious/values issue?
I can totally understand (and maybe even agree with) the argument to keep them single sex in 4th/5th mostly for the sake of girls who may have genuine logistical issues about their period that they're embarrassed to ask in front of boys.

But how does having a boy in class while your girl is taught the exact same issue change anything regarding the content from your religious point of view? I'm very confused by that.

It isn’t. It’s simply that being raised in a household that is religious generally means that the kids are raised in a more conservative manner which could mean that when talking about sex and puberty, the mother talks to her daughters and the father talks to his sons. This dynamic leads to girls being more comfortable discussing puberty in front of girls and boys being more comfortable discussing puberty in front of boys. But honestly I think most girls and boys arent comfortable discussing puberty and sex in front of members of the opposite sex. I feel this dynamic changes somewhat as they get older. I’m 40 and I’m comfortable discussing sex in general in front of men. But if we are talking about orgasms and things that are quite intimate, I’m only comfortable discussing this stuff with my close female friends. I don’t think that’s weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think anyone who is uncomfortable with this to the point of opting out isn’t already opting out

I know people who didn’t opt out of sex ed for their older kids that are considering opting out for their younger ones.

In APS? This is very hard to believe.

Perhaps you don’t interact with many families. There are a lot of immigrant families in Arlington that are more conservative when it comes to these issues.

I interact with many families which is why I find this very hard to believe. Which school?

Lol I’m an example. I’m an immigrant. Come from a westernized family but I’m Arab and Muslim. Not particularly religious - don’t pray but do fast because I view Ramadan as a cultural thing. I don’t cover my hair. Wear shorts (though not short shorts) and vote democrat. I am, like many Arabs and Muslim friends that I have, very uncomfortable with the idea of mixed gender sex education. I never considered opting my girls out of sex education but I am now wondering why on earth Arlington is pushing this and find it quite absurd. People may not share their opinions with you cuz we immigrants tend to only share our thoughts on these cultural issues with other immigrants. Trust me, if there is a recent immigrant you know that has told you that they are ok with this, they are either lying to you or in the minority. Yes I’m generalizing but I feel very comfortable making this generalization.

Sex ed is co-ed in many schools in the US - it's not absurd at all. You'd face the same situation in many other places.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok? It’s 2023. Glad to see VA is finally catching up with the rest of the world.

Are you insane? If girls have questions say about their periods they will not as with the crush sitting next to them! What a stupid and thoughtless comment you made!

WTF? I had co-ed sex ed back in the 80s and it was totally fine.

VA is so backwards sometimes.

[Anonymous]

[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think anyone who is uncomfortable with this to the point of opting out isn’t already opting out

I know people who didn’t opt out of sex ed for their older kids that are considering opting out for their younger ones.

In APS? This is very hard to believe.

Perhaps you don’t interact with many families. There are a lot of immigrant families in Arlington that are more conservative when it comes to these issues.

I interact with many families which is why I find this very hard to believe. Which school?

Lol I’m an example. I’m an immigrant. Come from a westernized family but I’m Arab and Muslim. Not particularly religious - don’t pray but do fast because I view Ramadan as a cultural thing. I don’t cover my hair. Wear shorts (though not short shorts) and vote democrat. I am, like many Arabs and Muslim friends that I have, very uncomfortable with the idea of mixed gender sex education. I never considered opting my girls out of sex education but I am now wondering why on earth Arlington is pushing this and find it quite absurd. People may not share their opinions with you cuz we immigrants tend to only share our thoughts on these cultural issues with other immigrants. Trust me, if there is a recent immigrant you know that has told you that they are ok with this, they are either lying to you or in the minority. Yes I’m generalizing but I feel very comfortable making this generalization.

Sex ed is co-ed in many schools in the US - it's not absurd at all. You'd face the same situation in many other places.

But it’s not coed in the majority of schools in the US including Arlington. What is the point of changing it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this change really necessary at this time to align with a state mandated curriculum change? If no, then I think APS should direct energies elsewhere considering they are still facing many students with learning loss.

And this doesn’t seem to be very respectful of the diverse community of APS. Many families hold more conservative views on such topics and APS should be respectful and inclusive of all.

Also didn’t Duran just say they were going to stop implementing new programs and changes and actually let the ones they have been making for years actually take hold?

Groan.

So you don’t care that arlington’s student body is getting more diverse? What should we do? Send them all back to their country?

I think it’s wonderful that APS is getting more diverse. I disagree that being “welcoming” means kowtowing to their religious beliefs and cultural hang ups. In the US, you are entitled to accommodation, that’s it. Not a seamless transition from the pulpit to the public school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this change really necessary at this time to align with a state mandated curriculum change? If no, then I think APS should direct energies elsewhere considering they are still facing many students with learning loss.

And this doesn’t seem to be very respectful of the diverse community of APS. Many families hold more conservative views on such topics and APS should be respectful and inclusive of all.

Also didn’t Duran just say they were going to stop implementing new programs and changes and actually let the ones they have been making for years actually take hold?

Groan.

So you don’t care that arlington’s student body is getting more diverse? What should we do? Send them all back to their country?

I think it’s wonderful that APS is getting more diverse. I disagree that being “welcoming” means kowtowing to their religious beliefs and cultural hang ups. In the US, you are entitled to accommodation, that’s it. Not a seamless transition from the pulpit to the public school.

Yes but if these immigrants are more comfortable with the policy that is already in place and seems to be working just fine, why change it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this change really necessary at this time to align with a state mandated curriculum change? If no, then I think APS should direct energies elsewhere considering they are still facing many students with learning loss.

And this doesn’t seem to be very respectful of the diverse community of APS. Many families hold more conservative views on such topics and APS should be respectful and inclusive of all.

Also didn’t Duran just say they were going to stop implementing new programs and changes and actually let the ones they have been making for years actually take hold?

Groan.

So you don’t care that arlington’s student body is getting more diverse? What should we do? Send them all back to their country?

I think it’s wonderful that APS is getting more diverse. I disagree that being “welcoming” means kowtowing to their religious beliefs and cultural hang ups. In the US, you are entitled to accommodation, that’s it. Not a seamless transition from the pulpit to the public school.

Yes but if these immigrants are more comfortable with the policy that is already in place and seems to be working just fine, why change it?

Also the reason why we have sex ed in schools is because it’s important from a public health perspective. Therefore it makes sense to teach the facts in a way that would reach the biggest audience possible. Keeping sex ed segregated achieves that. Coed classes mean more opt outs and more kids feeling awkward asking certain questions which make the classes less effective from a public health perspective. Remember it is APS and parents such as your self who are asking for a change. When something that is working perfectly fine is changed, there better be a good reason for doing so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think anyone who is uncomfortable with this to the point of opting out isn’t already opting out

I know people who didn’t opt out of sex ed for their older kids that are considering opting out for their younger ones.

In APS? This is very hard to believe.

Perhaps you don’t interact with many families. There are a lot of immigrant families in Arlington that are more conservative when it comes to these issues.

I interact with many families which is why I find this very hard to believe. Which school?

Lol I’m an example. I’m an immigrant. Come from a westernized family but I’m Arab and Muslim. Not particularly religious - don’t pray but do fast because I view Ramadan as a cultural thing. I don’t cover my hair. Wear shorts (though not short shorts) and vote democrat. I am, like many Arabs and Muslim friends that I have, very uncomfortable with the idea of mixed gender sex education. I never considered opting my girls out of sex education but I am now wondering why on earth Arlington is pushing this and find it quite absurd. People may not share their opinions with you cuz we immigrants tend to only share our thoughts on these cultural issues with other immigrants. Trust me, if there is a recent immigrant you know that has told you that they are ok with this, they are either lying to you or in the minority. Yes I’m generalizing but I feel very comfortable making this generalization.

Sex ed is co-ed in many schools in the US - it's not absurd at all. You'd face the same situation in many other places.

But it’s not coed in the majority of schools in the US including Arlington. What is the point of changing it?

It appears that this may already be the case, that sex ed has been coed since COVID? Probably was a decision motivated by staffing constraints and avoiding commingling initially.

I’m another poster that had coed sex ed for all but the initial 4th grade talk in the 90s. My school also had a family services office, so it’s not like the kids were uncomfortable with sexual matters. Wasn’t an issue and this was a conservative and multicultural district.

Today’s kids have a world of sex ed (good and bad) at their fingertips. I wouldn’t presume complete naievete, and I don’t believe conservative religious viewpoints should have any role in deciding what is good and desirable from a secular, community perspective. Religions get accommodated, not catered to. If you want a seamless bubble you need to pay for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think anyone who is uncomfortable with this to the point of opting out isn’t already opting out

I know people who didn’t opt out of sex ed for their older kids that are considering opting out for their younger ones.

In APS? This is very hard to believe.

Perhaps you don’t interact with many families. There are a lot of immigrant families in Arlington that are more conservative when it comes to these issues.

I interact with many families which is why I find this very hard to believe. Which school?

Lol I’m an example. I’m an immigrant. Come from a westernized family but I’m Arab and Muslim. Not particularly religious - don’t pray but do fast because I view Ramadan as a cultural thing. I don’t cover my hair. Wear shorts (though not short shorts) and vote democrat. I am, like many Arabs and Muslim friends that I have, very uncomfortable with the idea of mixed gender sex education. I never considered opting my girls out of sex education but I am now wondering why on earth Arlington is pushing this and find it quite absurd. People may not share their opinions with you cuz we immigrants tend to only share our thoughts on these cultural issues with other immigrants. Trust me, if there is a recent immigrant you know that has told you that they are ok with this, they are either lying to you or in the minority. Yes I’m generalizing but I feel very comfortable making this generalization.

Sex ed is co-ed in many schools in the US - it's not absurd at all. You'd face the same situation in many other places.

But it’s not coed in the majority of schools in the US including Arlington. What is the point of changing it?

It appears that this may already be the case, that sex ed has been coed since COVID? Probably was a decision motivated by staffing constraints and avoiding commingling initially.

I’m another poster that had coed sex ed for all but the initial 4th grade talk in the 90s. My school also had a family services office, so it’s not like the kids were uncomfortable with sexual matters. Wasn’t an issue and this was a conservative and multicultural district.

Today’s kids have a world of sex ed (good and bad) at their fingertips. I wouldn’t presume complete naievete, and I don’t believe conservative religious viewpoints should have any role in deciding what is good and desirable from a secular, community perspective. Religions get accommodated, not catered to. If you want a seamless bubble you need to pay for that.

What’s good is for kids to learn as much as possible in these classes and to have a safe space to discuss these sensitive topics. This isn’t a religious issue. This is about the best way to present this. And yes sex ed was coed during covid. APA wasn’t operating under the best of circumstances and did what it needed to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think anyone who is uncomfortable with this to the point of opting out isn’t already opting out

I know people who didn’t opt out of sex ed for their older kids that are considering opting out for their younger ones.

In APS? This is very hard to believe.

Perhaps you don’t interact with many families. There are a lot of immigrant families in Arlington that are more conservative when it comes to these issues.

I interact with many families which is why I find this very hard to believe. Which school?

Lol I’m an example. I’m an immigrant. Come from a westernized family but I’m Arab and Muslim. Not particularly religious - don’t pray but do fast because I view Ramadan as a cultural thing. I don’t cover my hair. Wear shorts (though not short shorts) and vote democrat. I am, like many Arabs and Muslim friends that I have, very uncomfortable with the idea of mixed gender sex education. I never considered opting my girls out of sex education but I am now wondering why on earth Arlington is pushing this and find it quite absurd. People may not share their opinions with you cuz we immigrants tend to only share our thoughts on these cultural issues with other immigrants. Trust me, if there is a recent immigrant you know that has told you that they are ok with this, they are either lying to you or in the minority. Yes I’m generalizing but I feel very comfortable making this generalization.

Sex ed is co-ed in many schools in the US - it's not absurd at all. You'd face the same situation in many other places.

But it’s not coed in the majority of schools in the US including Arlington. What is the point of changing it?

It appears that this may already be the case, that sex ed has been coed since COVID? Probably was a decision motivated by staffing constraints and avoiding commingling initially.

I’m another poster that had coed sex ed for all but the initial 4th grade talk in the 90s. My school also had a family services office, so it’s not like the kids were uncomfortable with sexual matters. Wasn’t an issue and this was a conservative and multicultural district.

Today’s kids have a world of sex ed (good and bad) at their fingertips. I wouldn’t presume complete naievete, and I don’t believe conservative religious viewpoints should have any role in deciding what is good and desirable from a secular, community perspective. Religions get accommodated, not catered to. If you want a seamless bubble you need to pay for that.

What’s good is for kids to learn as much as possible in these classes and to have a safe space to discuss these sensitive topics. This isn’t a religious issue. This is about the best way to present this. And yes sex ed was coed during covid. APA wasn’t operating under the best of circumstances and did what it needed to do.

So if it’s been working, which it appears to be if APS wants to make it official, why not not stick with it? How many of us have actually been in a sex ed class in the last 15-20 years and can speak to what kids are and aren’t comfortable asking in mixed company? Times have changed, kids have changed, and mores have changed.

Very interested in what the teachers on the ground are seeing in terms of discussions and comfort levels.