s/o If all the adult males are duds who will our DDs marry?!

[Anonymous]

DD (18) , freshman in college, gave up on "boys". She get hit up by boys all the time. She is very careful with them and take her time. A lot of "boys" disappear when they find out that she is not a player. She wonders why the "boys" don't take their time to get to know me before trying to make out with me. DD likes to spend time with "girls night out" then with the boy. She has more fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Welcome to the world of AA women. To speak colloquially, "we been knew"

AA women are the ones raising AA men.

And white women are the ones raising white men.

[Anonymous]

Just got back from a wedding this past weekend —

Most women in their late twenties to mid thirties there were married:

Basic observations:

1. Don’t be fat
2. Go to a good school. (Colgate / wake forest type schools or higher ranked schools).
3. Have a professional job

Interesting observations:

The women at the wedding were almost all white - maybe 2 non-white women.

The men at the wedding were majority white but way more diverse than the women - Asian, Indian, South American, a couple black guys.

All the Asian guys had white women partners.

The black guys seemed single

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God willing, they'll marry each other. If they decide to marry.

+1 😂

Seriously, I know who we/our kids are attracted to is inherent, not a choice. So it will be what it will be.

But I know quite a few awesome lesbian couples. Smart, loving, kind, and free of the external gender-stereotyping that tends to give men an extra, unearned boost just for doing the basics. (“Awww. Bob is leaving early to pick up his sick son. He’s such an INVOLVED dad!! 🙄) And far less drama, cheating, and abuse.

Seriously, my DD will choose her own partner, of course. But I can certainly see the upside to her if she chooses a woman who is as smart, mature, and kind as she is ….

I see your point, but for FWIW, I do recall reading once that the happiest and most successful marriages are actually gay men.

Take that for whatever its worth

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God willing, they'll marry each other. If they decide to marry.

+1 😂

Seriously, I know who we/our kids are attracted to is inherent, not a choice. So it will be what it will be.

But I know quite a few awesome lesbian couples. Smart, loving, kind, and free of the external gender-stereotyping that tends to give men an extra, unearned boost just for doing the basics. (“Awww. Bob is leaving early to pick up his sick son. He’s such an INVOLVED dad!! 🙄) And far less drama, cheating, and abuse.

Seriously, my DD will choose her own partner, of course. But I can certainly see the upside to her if she chooses a woman who is as smart, mature, and kind as she is ….

I see your point, but for FWIW, I do recall reading once that the happiest and most successful marriages are actually gay men.

Take that for whatever its worth

What?

Aren’t gay men the most sloppy/promíscuous bunch?

I would think the happiest marriages would be educated and rich lesbians

[Anonymous]

Our family too-- no video games. We all stay family-oriented with sports and volunteer work. Kids' friends are similar. Not fat burrito -eating slobs. We talk about everything at our nightly dinner table. Kids are taught to *think*.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God willing, they'll marry each other. If they decide to marry.

Exactly

[Anonymous]

No video games family here too. Phones are off after 9pm and on Sundays. That's family day. Hiking, biking, volunteer work, etc.

Kids (2 boys, 1 girl) clean their own rooms and shared bathroom. We do have a weekly cleaner but she does not touch those spaces. That luxury is for me!

My boys will *not* be duds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a son and a stepson and am raising them not to be duds. My son just quizzed his sister on her foreign language lesson while folding laundry and stepson just cleaned up the kitchen.

Same. I am working hard to raise a good adult. He may not be the straight A student, but he has learned good working habits, responsibility, courtesy, honesty, how to take care of his health. He has picked up hobbies that can last a lifetime, and he has started doing volunteer work that "he" picked out. I never said a word about that.

Is he perfect? No.

Will he have the typical conflicts in a romantic relationship? Likely.

But overall, he's turning into a really great guy.

Having said that, he's not really on track to be a tech engineer, doctor, or lawyer, so he's not going to make half a million each year, or whatever. But he will be solid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a son and a stepson and am raising them not to be duds. My son just quizzed his sister on her foreign language lesson while folding laundry and stepson just cleaned up the kitchen.

Same. I am working hard to raise a good adult. He may not be the straight A student, but he has learned good working habits, responsibility, courtesy, honesty, how to take care of his health. He has picked up hobbies that can last a lifetime, and he has started doing volunteer work that "he" picked out. I never said a word about that.

Is he perfect? No.

Will he have the typical conflicts in a romantic relationship? Likely.

But overall, he's turning into a really great guy.

Having said that, he's not really on track to be a tech engineer, doctor, or lawyer, so he's not going to make half a million each year, or whatever. But he will be solid.

You better hope he turns out pretty good looking and Atleast 6’ tall…

….because if he isn’t, he’s not going to be able to date in this area with “pedestrian” status/jobs/education

[Anonymous]

Maybe cut off the video games and have them watch MSNBC instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe cut off the video games and have them watch MSNBC instead.

Watch news all day, and then they'll be depressed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe cut off the video games and have them watch MSNBC instead.

My mom’s gerontologist told me that the single biggest predictor of severe mental health problems in her patient population is whether they watch either MSNBC or Fox and for how long.

I’m not sure I’d want my DD to marry a man obsessed with cable news.