Play date turned babysitting - WWYD
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Anonymous
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Working mom of a toddler here. I have a flex work schedule that allows me to take every other Friday off. I have this Friday off and a neighbor SAHM of a similar age toddler invited us to go together on a zoo outing. I said yes and was happily planning on it. Now I get a message from this mom telling me that something nonessential came up, and what would I think of taking both of our toddlers to the zoo without her? Or just having her toddler over for a play date.
I’m not comfortable taking her kid on a zoo outing by myself (it sounds overwhelming to take two 2 year olds) and I am fine explaining that to her. But I am thinking that on my day off, I’d still like to do the zoo with my child - not host a play date (a.k.a. Free babysitting). Am I a terrible neighbor if I say no? Do I make up an excuse or just be honest? I feel selfish but I also don’t get tons of time to do fun outdoors stuff with my kid and don’t want to lose this opportunity. Advice? |
Anonymous
| Just say no. |
Anonymous
| "Oh that's too bad-let's just reschedule!" |
Anonymous
| "Let's reschedule!" |
Anonymous
| Say you are uncomfortable supervising another toddler. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
No, this is terrible advice, OP! Don't do this. Never ever give a reason you're saying no. Your response is "Let's just reschedule for a time when you're free." |
Anonymous
| Agree with the others. Just suggest rescheduling. Take your own kid and do what you like for the day. |
Anonymous
| Definitely suggest rescheduling. |
Anonymous
| Suggest a reschedule and sorry she can’t make it, but you are your toddler still plan to go. |
Anonymous
+1 Might add that you already mentioned it to your DC and he/she is looking forward to it. |
Anonymous
| She might be trying to sneakily get babysitting, or she might feel bad about bailing and think your toddler was looking forward to spending time with her toddler so she didn't want to scrap the whole thing if you still wanted your kids to hang out (I think this is super dumb for 2 year olds but I could see a parent suggesting this for 8 year olds or something). Give her the benefit of the doubt and just say "no that's okay let's just pick a different day!" |
Anonymous
+1 don't give a reason, just reschedule. And don't say your kid was excited about it... just reschedule. I would also not want to spend my day off watching someone else's child and this isn't something you should feel bad about. I'm a SAHM and often had other kids dumped on me. Set the boundary now. In my experience people who do that rarely, if ever, reciprocate. |
Anonymous
+1 - you’re allowed to not want to change the plan, OP. This is a good response - no need to give a reason why you don’t want to babysit! |
Anonymous
No this is just rubbing it in her face. She doesn’t need to know your plans that day. |