"Um, I'm on a really important work call" - he says, half naked in our bathroom

[Anonymous]

In the middle of the day my husband was standing in our bathroom, half naked, putting on deodorant because he'd just gotten out of the shower. He also had his air pods in. I quietly asked him a quick question about what he was doing, partially with words and partially with a gesture, because *I* wanted to use our bathroom. And he reacts to me by pulling out one air pod and saying in a dismissive, annoyed-as-hell voice, "Um, I'm on a really important work call," - like, how dare you disturb me right now, I'm obviously working.

WTF?

He got off his call and I tried to approach it in a joking manner - like, you can forgive me for not realizing you couldn't be disturbed - and he saw no humor in it. In his mind, I should have magically known not to disturb him. Even when he's standing in OUR bathroom, and I'm trying to figure out if he's going to be in there for long because I have to pee. In my bathroom.

God I'm annoyed and I really want to hear from others that my annoyance is justified.

[Anonymous]

I'd be annoyed as well. I wouldn't expect my spouse to be on a work call in the bathroom.

[Anonymous]

You are 100% wrong. I hate when people come in the bathroom to ask me questions. Just wait 10 minutes unless you are dying or the house is on fire.

[Anonymous]

Totally justified. WTF?!

[Anonymous]

People are really not meant to spend this much time together. Give your husband a break and apologize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd be annoyed as well. I wouldn't expect my spouse to be on a work call in the bathroom.

What I expect from my spouse is to have some privacy for 10-15 it takes me to poop and shower.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are 100% wrong. I hate when people come in the bathroom to ask me questions. Just wait 10 minutes unless you are dying or the house is on fire.

OP here, and to be clear this is a large master bathroom and the door was not closed. I've never in my life waited until he was out of the bathroom to come in.

[Anonymous]

This type of interaction would deeply bother me and my DH and I would probably be weird with each other all day until we finally talked to each other and apologized.

But that is because we have a very low conflict relationship and are very careful to make sure we don't talk to each other with 'tones'. Like this would be SO atypical as to make me wonder if he was really mad about something else.

That said my DH is also kind of high stress when on work calls and if he was going to snap at me it might be in this kind of a situation. But he would for sure apologize after the fact. So I guess its like, is he like this all the time or otherwise normal? Because this would be an issue in my house but I get the impression that most people on DCUM would think my DH and I are WAY TOO SENSITIVE and that we are not the norm.

[Anonymous]

He just got out of the shower? Who cares what he's doing, wait for him to leave or pee elsewhere.

I could see if he'd been in there for a long time, but you saw he just got out of the shower. Why are you rushing him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be annoyed as well. I wouldn't expect my spouse to be on a work call in the bathroom.

What I expect from my spouse is to have some privacy for 10-15 it takes me to poop and shower.

Agreed. But all that goes out the window if you leave the door open.

Leaving the door open is the universal signal that it’s okay for someone to come in the room. Leaving the door open is the universal signal that you do NOT need privacy. Basically, you can’t have it both ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are 100% wrong. I hate when people come in the bathroom to ask me questions. Just wait 10 minutes unless you are dying or the house is on fire.

OP here, and to be clear this is a large master bathroom and the door was not closed. I've never in my life waited until he was out of the bathroom to come in.

Well that would drive me batty to begin with. -DP

[Anonymous]

Literally had my husband wander into the bathroom this am when I was in the shower. He asked me to "shhh" because he was on a call. Sir, I was here first! (apparently he needed my deodorant bc he was out?)
Oohhh, work from home - good times

[Anonymous]

I hate being bothered in the bathroom as well. I’d let it go, we are all working a bit too close to our SO while WFH and for too long. Easy to get on each others nerves. But I do get it when you are turning something into a joke and the other person doesn’t want to participate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be annoyed as well. I wouldn't expect my spouse to be on a work call in the bathroom.

What I expect from my spouse is to have some privacy for 10-15 it takes me to poop and shower.

Agreed. But all that goes out the window if you leave the door open.

Leaving the door open is the universal signal that it’s okay for someone to come in the room. Leaving the door open is the universal signal that you do NOT need privacy. Basically, you can’t have it both ways.

I do not enter our bathroom if my DH is in there without some verbal question. My DH does not enter the bathroom when I am in there without some verbal question. I would lose my mind if he did that all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are 100% wrong. I hate when people come in the bathroom to ask me questions. Just wait 10 minutes unless you are dying or the house is on fire.

OP here, and to be clear this is a large master bathroom and the door was not closed. I've never in my life waited until he was out of the bathroom to come in.

Maybe this is his way of letting you know to wait until he is out of the bathroom to come in.