| I’m a night owl so doesn’t bother me - but I think many parents just pick up earlier if they don’t want to stay up that late or call an Uber. I often agreed to take her friends home later bc I was up anyway and my daughter wanted that friend to stay later. So if your kid wants to stay later than 9/10 they can problem solve alternatives. If it’s a group hangout then maybe another kid lives near you and can take them home. Many kids in high school will also bus and in groups that’s usually fine |
Is there any adult awake when your child gets home? I think it's important to be awake enough to engage in a short conversation with your teen as a way to keep an eye on possible drug or alcohol use. |
| We live in the city so our kids either walk back or take the metro. |
| It’s normal. We have to pick up once a week from a school activity that goes past midnight most weeks. It’s on Fridays but still—hard on the parents who go to bed early. You just do it for a few years… |
Op here. My kid has only taken an Uber once and that was from school to home. If possible, I always try to drive kids early on to the venue and hope/ask another parent can drive my kid home at the end of the night. I also have a 13yo middle school kid and he gets driven home most of the time. His nights end much earlier, more like 8-9pm. My teen has new friends I don’t know or have met once or twice briefly. Don’t know many of the parents at all. |
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Welcome to the new challenges of parenting a teen.
It’s cute your biggest issue right now is driving while tired. God bless. |
| Yes, I pick my kids up late (while I’m in my pjs). Try and carpool to divide the pick ups and drop offs. |
Nope. I have known this family for 10y. We vacation together and have very similar parenting styles. I trust my kid at their house...and know where they hang out, where the alcohol is/isn't, and know that the parents are super engaged when the kids are there. Kid is leaving for college in 6m so in 6m I won't be engaging in a conversation with him when he gets home. |
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Yes we pick up kids late and will take other kids home too if they leave nearby.
We picked up my 15 year old at 1:30 AM the other night because they had a late night babysitting gig. (We don't have the parents drive because I'm worried about drunk driving) |
Wow, what's the activity? |
Swim. Otherwise I don’t care and will pick up when ever. |
There are many exceptions (including traveling from a school activity or job) and this “guideline” is enforced never. Otherwise, you’re correct. |
I know lots of parents that enforce it. And lots that don't. And which kid goes with which parent is...as expected. |
| If I have room in the car I would drive everyone home at the end of party. |
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One of us would pick up at 11pm from a party, the other would be in bed. We wouldn’t mind for a birthday party and would prefer this to a sleepover. A group of freshman boys sleeping over can end up in trouble. We stopped sleepovers in middle school.
We like to go to sleep early but we currently have a 13 and 16 yo. Our 13 yo has practice twice per week and doesn’t get out until 9:30. It’s too late but it is what it is and we make it work for her love of the sport. Our 16 year old is never sleeping before us. As a general rule for both kids, I need advance notice and won’t drive past ten on a weekend unless it is a special event. I’d always rather them call me than an Uber or get in the car with another teen at that time. |