Daycare vs. nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We never considered getting a nanny (due to financial, space and personal preference of not wanting to deal with being an employer). We found a great daycare and love the stability of it - both that we know exactly when it is open and closed (except for the pandemic...) and that our child has been able to stay in the same place for 5 years with several consistent caregivers that know and adore her. Transition to preschool was super easy. Also because it was affordable for us we have been able to afford private therapies for her autism, which are making a huge difference.

The research suggests some small negative effects from putting a baby in daycare but there are so many other things that matter so much more, most importantly your parenting. So do what works best for your family. Nannies definitely have their advantages, not discounting that. Just know that a well vetted daycare can be a great option as well.

+1
Daycare has been amazing for our child with special needs. He has benefited so much from having peer models. We put him in at 16 months after having him at home with family members, and he has made so much progress since starting there. Who knows, maybe a high quality nanny would have had the same effect or better, but we are very happy with our choice.

[Anonymous]

Do what you think best for your DC. Different children are different and different families are different.

We were very happy with our daycare from an early age. Our street does not have other children same age, so daycare near us (not Bright Horizons or another chain) was a better choice. It had tons of age-appropriate educational toys & play things, other children the same age, and provided good socialization, and a little exposure to learning (E.g., color names, letters) — all things a nanny would not have provided in our case in our neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We never considered getting a nanny (due to financial, space and personal preference of not wanting to deal with being an employer). We found a great daycare and love the stability of it - both that we know exactly when it is open and closed (except for the pandemic...) and that our child has been able to stay in the same place for 5 years with several consistent caregivers that know and adore her. Transition to preschool was super easy. Also because it was affordable for us we have been able to afford private therapies for her autism, which are making a huge difference.

The research suggests some small negative effects from putting a baby in daycare but there are so many other things that matter so much more, most importantly your parenting. So do what works best for your family. Nannies definitely have their advantages, not discounting that. Just know that a well vetted daycare can be a great option as well.

+1
Daycare has been amazing for our child with special needs. He has benefited so much from having peer models. We put him in at 16 months after having him at home with family members, and he has made so much progress since starting there. Who knows, maybe a high quality nanny would have had the same effect or better, but we are very happy with our choice.

PP here. We actually had a similar experience in that our child's center was closed due to the pandemic when DD was 12-17 months old. At 16 months she wasn't talking so we started early intervention. Her speech explosion started a couple of months later, after she started back at daycare. Could be a coincidence but the speech therapist definitely said it was helpful for her to be in a center with other kids her age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do what you think best for your DC. Different children are different and different families are different.

We were very happy with our daycare from an early age. Our street does not have other children same age, so daycare near us (not Bright Horizons or another chain) was a better choice. It had tons of age-appropriate educational toys & play things, other children the same age, and provided good socialization, and a little exposure to learning (E.g., color names, letters) — all things a nanny would not have provided in our case in our neighborhood.

My child learned colors, numbers, shapes, and the alphabet from her nanny. It’s not rocket science.

[Anonymous]

If cost isn't an issue, a nanny is a no-brainer in my opinion. Keep the nanny full-time until kindergarten (and beyond?), even when your kid is old enough to start part-time preschool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The fact that a nanny costs much more than daycare, and well off parents usually choose that option, tells you that nannies are better than daycare. Of course, if you feel anxious about the lack of oversight, then a nanny is not right for you. But shit happens at daycare too.

We had a nanny from infancy to age 2 when a brief daycare stint went poorly, and now we have a nanny again. Managing a good nanny isn’t hard. Hire a payroll company so you don’t need to deal with that stuff. Even if she uses up her 5 sick days per year, that’s nothing compared to how much work you’ll miss when your kid is sick from daycare germs.

Not everyone wants someone in their house all the time.

[Anonymous]

We went with Daycare since 4 months. Its been great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We chose nanny and will keep a FT nanny until the kids are old enough to drive.

Same. I don't understand the people who say "nanny until age 2 or 3 when the kid is ready to socialize." Are they keeping their baby locked in their house all day? Don't they let the nanny take them out? Our nanny took our babies/toddlers/preschoolers out for a morning activity, then home for lunch and a nap, then out a second time. They played with other kids every single day.

Socializing with nanny at a music class or the playground is different than socializing in a group setting with the same kids all under the care of one or two caregivers. Kids learn to be more assertive for their own needs, which helps with language. They learn how to function better in group settings so the whole class can engage in different activities. If a kid is being defiant, nanny can remove the child and focus on helping the child navigate their emotions. In a larger group, however, the teacher is limited in this aspect, but the children see first hand how their behavior affects the group as a whole. Learning how to socialize this way is good for developing friendships within friend groups and helps them develop skills for functioning in a classroom.

That’s why so many people do both by choosing nanny plus preschool at 2.5-3.

[1SWMom]

I did 3 days a week full day daycare and 3 days a week (sundays) with nanny, it was the perfect mix and made for great socialization and a much easier transition to Pre K-3

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nanny all the way until 2-3 when the kid is ready to socialize.

+1

[Anonymous]

Nanny until 3 and their immune systems develop. Having naps at home, home cooked food and no rushing to and from every day was priceless for us. Both kids went to pre-k at 3 as they were ready to spend all day with other kids and a lot more stimulation. First year at care was a lot more sickness but there are more medicines and much easier to care for a sick 3 year ild than a sick 6 month old. We had older nannies who were already grandmas or not yet so they didnt spend tome o. Their phones and did baby laundry and cooked soups etc for the kids.

[Anonymous]

We used a nanny for #1 and Daycare for #2. Both kids were fine. Both have pros and cons..and of course it matters who the nanny is and which daycare. Neither kid got sick much so we were lucky with that.

[Anonymous]

I have had a nanny and put my kids in daycare. What is “better” depends on what you value and the relative quality of the actual options you have - ie, your actual nanny vs “nannies” in general. You should think about what your actual priorities are and make sure you screen for that in a nanny. For reliability, daycare cannot be beat. Even the best nanny will need to take sick days, and luck will have it that it’ll be the day when one parent is traveling and the other has an important work meeting.

One of the reasons I hired a nanny was because I wanted my baby to nap at home, but the nanny was always out and about so only one nap was at home. A great nanny is definitely the best option, but a good daycare is better than a mediocre nanny (and lots of them are very mediocre).

[Anonymous]

I nannied for a baby and been around nannies for years; I don’t think degrees matter at all (and I say that as someone with a college degree). The best childcare in my experience are caregivers who really love children and who are conscientious (meaning punctual, clean and professional). These two qualities have little to do with ECE qualifications. But for an infant, a nanny who pays focused attention and loves them is much more valuable than a daycare, where staff turnover is high and the individual needs of the child are distributed across multiple caregivers.

[Anonymous]

Quality daycare center all the way your baby will be much more stimulated learning to socialize. Verbal skills will come quicker and they are much happier.
If you have a nanny and they don’t feel like putting in top quality work every minute of every day, your baby gets short changed