Don't get fat and happy just because you've been married for over 20 years.

[Anonymous]

Feel so bad for Holly Petraeus. However, there she is with a husband who is a runner and in peak shape, and of course he's going to be looking at a woman who is as fit as he is. I look around my neighborhood friends, and I always worry when I see that the couple isn't really on the wavelength anymore. Like the wife who has become really successful, has killer upper arms and has taken care of herself, and the husband who has just let it go. Those are the couples that are going to have problems and it makes me sad. I just want to take the one aside that is losing their touch and shake them and say hey!----wake up!-----relationships are work! Put down the donuts and start caring for yourself!

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the PSA.

[Anonymous]

Wait, I've been married 20 years. I can't "get happy"? So many new rules today.

[Anonymous]

Lol. As if relationships were that simple. OP, you don't sound married.

[Anonymous]

What, you didn't get the memo?

[Anonymous]

Sadly, I kind of agree. I would still be furious if my DH cheated on me, but if I were 40 pounds heavier, didn't care what I looked like and had completely lost all semblance of my former self, I would have to admit to myself that an affair wouldn't be a big surprise. Men are men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Feel so bad for Holly Petraeus. However, there she is with a husband who is a runner and in peak shape, and of course he's going to be looking at a woman who is as fit as he is. I look around my neighborhood friends, and I always worry when I see that the couple isn't really on the wavelength anymore. Like the wife who has become really successful, has killer upper arms and has taken care of herself, and the husband who has just let it go. Those are the couples that are going to have problems and it makes me sad. I just want to take the one aside that is losing their touch and shake them and say hey!----wake up!-----relationships are work! Put down the donuts and start caring for yourself!

Can you speak to my husband? This is us.

[Anonymous]

Nice try OP. You sound very naive. I know more fit women who get cheated on than fat women. Sometimes it's about the physical attractiveness but more often it's not. There are many other aspects of a relationship/fidelity/cheating, than toned armes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sadly, I kind of agree. I would still be furious if my DH cheated on me, but if I were 40 pounds heavier, didn't care what I looked like and had completely lost all semblance of my former self, I would have to admit to myself that an affair wouldn't be a big surprise. Men are men.

Gotta agree. I was 110 pounds when I married my DH 25 years ago. I was 114 at my doctor's appointment on Thursday. I was an avid runner back then. I can't run marathons anymore because of knee injuries. But I still run every single day. My husband married a women who cared about her health and fitness and about the way she looked. Changing the rules after a few years of marriage seems unfair.

If I were overweight, I'm not sure I would blame my husband for looking elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Feel so bad for Holly Petraeus. However, there she is with a husband who is a runner and in peak shape, and of course he's going to be looking at a woman who is as fit as he is. I look around my neighborhood friends, and I always worry when I see that the couple isn't really on the wavelength anymore. Like the wife who has become really successful, has killer upper arms and has taken care of herself, and the husband who has just let it go. Those are the couples that are going to have problems and it makes me sad. I just want to take the one aside that is losing their touch and shake them and say hey!----wake up!-----relationships are work! Put down the donuts and start caring for yourself!

Can you speak to my husband? This is us.

OP here, yeah, my husband too.

[Anonymous]

Yeah really, get toned arms and jog a lot, then you can become a bag of bones controlling shrew and still not have to worry about your dh
Good luck op in your future love life!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sadly, I kind of agree. I would still be furious if my DH cheated on me, but if I were 40 pounds heavier, didn't care what I looked like and had completely lost all semblance of my former self, I would have to admit to myself that an affair wouldn't be a big surprise. Men are men.

Gotta agree. I was 110 pounds when I married my DH 25 years ago. I was 114 at my doctor's appointment on Thursday. I was an avid runner back then. I can't run marathons anymore because of knee injuries. But I still run every single day. My husband married a women who cared about her health and fitness and about the way she looked. Changing the rules after a few years of marriage seems unfair.

If I were overweight, I'm not sure I would blame my husband for looking elsewhere.

I think mine would still be okay even if I were overweight. Not obese, but just overweight. But if I was overweight AND my hair looked like shit and I didn't wear makeup and dressed like a slob and never bothered to even try to look nice for him, that would be that. And if I'm being honest, I'm probably the same. I love him to death but if the man gained 50 pounds, quit shaving, wore sweats all the time and in general gave me no impression that he was interested in me being attracted to him or not, my eye would probably wander.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Feel so bad for Holly Petraeus. However, there she is with a husband who is a runner and in peak shape, and of course he's going to be looking at a woman who is as fit as he is. I look around my neighborhood friends, and I always worry when I see that the couple isn't really on the wavelength anymore. Like the wife who has become really successful, has killer upper arms and has taken care of herself, and the husband who has just let it go. Those are the couples that are going to have problems and it makes me sad. I just want to take the one aside that is losing their touch and shake them and say hey!----wake up!-----relationships are work! Put down the donuts and start caring for yourself!

Can you speak to my husband? This is us.

OP here, yeah, my husband too.

But there is no way you are leaving him.

[Anonymous]

15:03 and 15:13 here. Not to sound like I condone Petraeus' affair. I totally don't. But I DO get the impulse and the temptation. What I find it hard to understand is why a man who had so much to publicly lose (prestigious position, loving family, sterling military career) would actually risk it all for a piece of ass. I understand the temptation, I just don't understand him giving in to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah really, get toned arms and jog a lot, then you can become a bag of bones controlling shrew and still not have to worry about your dh
Good luck op in your future love life!

So, getting in shape makes me a shrew? I was never out of shape.....and I don't try to control him. I just wish he'd care enough about himself.