Don't get fat and happy just because you've been married for over 20 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man here. It's not Holly's weight or anything physical that made him cheat. You guys are overanalyzing the situation. He was offere some free P*ssy from an attractive woman and he took it (only it wasn't free and cost him everything). I'm sure he loves and respects his wife and thinks she's a great person/mother/etc. No matter how attractive my wife was, if a pretty woman was embedded with me and infatuated with me, it would be hard to turn her down. Just being honest.

LOL. Best post on this thread! Laughing cause all the women here are just fighting among themselves and throwing up theories, when the real story is just simple. It doesn't matter if Holly was the fittest, most beautiful, and most perfect woman around. If another woman is constantly hovering around her husband, there's a big chance that there'll be some cheating going on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe her focus on more important matters is what drew Petraeus to her in the fist place and kept them married for 37 years.

Sure that's it, 'more important matters.' Not the fact that every cadet in the place wanted the superintendent's cute daughter and he was the one to snag her and marry her 2 days after graduation.

You're telling me she might WANT to look that way? Then why did she go clothes-shopping with Jill Kelley? No one would choose to look that way, they just don't know what to do about it.

I see my mom when I look at her. Admiral's wife with no self-esteem, depression-era frugality and a fear of drawing attention to herself.

Feel sorry for your mom having a daughter that doesn't respect her.

I am not the poster to whom you responded, but when I read this my hackles went up. You feel sorry for the poster's mum, because voicing critique is synonymous with disrespect, did I get this right?
This is the most ludicrous statement that I read on this message board in a long time! First, respect is not automatic; it has to be earned. Second, children do not automatically owe their parents respect. There are many children who grow up into decent adults despite, not because of, their parents. I am a social worker, so I see my share of this on a daily basis. Third, respect does not mean that one cannot see another person's flaws and problems. Quite the opposite! I would much rather be surrounded by people who provide constructive feedback and help me overcome my problems than with those who simply ignore them.

This is off topic, but a few years ago, I had a client who was the spitting image of the admiral's wife described above: no self-esteem, afraid of sticking out, convinced that she was unworthy of love and attention. She was naturally introverted, but the real reason for her behaviour was her upbringing - a mother who kept telling her that she was worthless (I guess she should have respected her for that, right?) - and the resulting self-loathing. After an almost-suicide attempt (she claimed the overdose of sleeping pills was an accident) she was referred to me thanks to her oldest daughter who had recognised her mother's issues for years unlike the husband and older siblings who just"respected" her too much to do anything. Thanks to her daughter's disrespect, she underwent therapy, started volunteering, took some adult classes, got a new look, and most importantly she is finally enjoying her life. Her relationship with her youngest daughter and her grandchildren is greatly improved, and the two are now quite close -- all because the daughter "disrespected" her and finally took the steps needed to help.

In conclusion, let me give you some advice: Think, before you spout rubbish. It will prevent you from looking like a fool!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. It's not Holly's weight or anything physical that made him cheat. You guys are overanalyzing the situation. He was offere some free P*ssy from an attractive woman and he took it (only it wasn't free and cost him everything). I'm sure he loves and respects his wife and thinks she's a great person/mother/etc. No matter how attractive my wife was, if a pretty woman was embedded with me and infatuated with me, it would be hard to turn her down. Just being honest.

LOL. Best post on this thread! Laughing cause all the women here are just fighting among themselves and throwing up theories, when the real story is just simple. It doesn't matter if Holly was the fittest, most beautiful, and most perfect woman around. If another woman is constantly hovering around her husband, there's a big chance that there'll be some cheating going on.

As someone who has had an affair with a married man, +1000 to the PP above. His wife was young and relatively good looking. She was a bitch though and her nagging deflated his self esteem. I found him to be funny, sexy, and charming and told him so. He needed the ego boost and enjoyed the attention I gave him. He loved his wife and family. I understood up front what we had wasn't permanent, just fun. We both got something from each other we were lacking from our lives at the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Holly Petreaus made a lot of sacrifices for her husband that he should have been eternally grateful for instead of betraying her trust."

Such as?

At the top of the military as well as major corporations no doubt there are many wives who make this deal -and "I don't get care what you do or who you do it with as long as I get to live on this lifestyle and it isn't thrown in my face." This might have been one of those marriages.

Agreed. And for heaven's sake, none of her sacrifices is an excuse for her being fat and badly groomed. Besides, she's a very wealthy lady - where's the sacrifice there?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Holly Petreaus made a lot of sacrifices for her husband that he should have been eternally grateful for instead of betraying her trust."

Such as?

At the top of the military as well as major corporations no doubt there are many wives who make this deal -and "I don't get care what you do or who you do it with as long as I get to live on this lifestyle and it isn't thrown in my face." This might have been one of those marriages.

Agreed. And for heaven's sake, none of her sacrifices is an excuse for her being fat and badly groomed. Besides, she's a very wealthy lady - where's the sacrifice there?

You revived this thread just to share that?

[Anonymous]

I think that he shouldn't have cheated on her. Period. But at the same time, it wouldn't have hurt to take care of herself and her figure a little bit!!! And her hair needs some makeover, too. I have been married for 16 yrs. now, but I still work hard to remain beautiful.. I watch my diet and work out as to be desirable to my still very sexy hubby.
While I do not condone Petraeus, all I am saying is that she certainly is very undesirable and shouldn't have let herself go as she did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that he shouldn't have cheated on her. Period. But at the same time, it wouldn't have hurt to take care of herself and her figure a little bit!!! And her hair needs some makeover, too. I have been married for 16 yrs. now, but I still work hard to remain beautiful.. I watch my diet and work out as to be desirable to my still very sexy hubby.
While I do not condone Petraeus, all I am saying is that she certainly is very undesirable and shouldn't have let herself go as she did.

Geez, you resurrect a nearly 2 year old thread???

and while we're at it, how is that in 14 pages, there is nary a mention of Paula, the bitch who seduced and fucked Mrs. Petraeus' hubby? That lady truly ruined two families, brought down one the most intelligent, progressive thinking generals in a generation or two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"If we want women to be valued as people with brains rather than sex objects or eye candy, not caring about appearance is exactly what we need to do. "

I'm a feminist, but not a lesbian, and I do not believe this. I believe that caring about one's appearance is totally normal and natural.

Excuse me but you're a moron if you think that it's lesbian to not care about one's appearance. And a bigot. FWIW my lesbian daughter cares a whole lot more about her appearance than I, her straight mom, care about mine. You're ignorant.

We're talking butches here, not femmes.

Butches are hot and a ton look ripped, well groomed, and fantastic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sadly, I kind of agree. I would still be furious if my DH cheated on me, but if I were 40 pounds heavier, didn't care what I looked like and had completely lost all semblance of my former self, I would have to admit to myself that an affair wouldn't be a big surprise. Men are men.

Gotta agree. I was 110 pounds when I married my DH 25 years ago. I was 114 at my doctor's appointment on Thursday. I was an avid runner back then. I can't run marathons anymore because of knee injuries. But I still run every single day. My husband married a women who cared about her health and fitness and about the way she looked. Changing the rules after a few years of marriage seems unfair.

If I were overweight, I'm not sure I would blame my husband for looking elsewhere.

It sounds like he also married a shallow idiot. Glad you haven't changed.

[Anonymous]

There are alot of women (not all) that once they get married figure they have the poor bastard by the balls and the rules change. They gain weight, on the phone with their Moms all the time and going shopping. You are the one that is supposed to stfu and pay for it all.

Now all your DWs are going to scream bloody murder but you know in your hearts of hearts - the wedding is the goal.

I tell all young adult men do not spoil your girlfriends. They are used to being pursued, used to you courting them and it sets the wrong dynamic for marriage. Once married, they feel like they are in control. They gain weight - fuck off. They don't want sex - fuck off. What are you gonna do - leave your family ? Want that job promotion in another state - fuck off - we are staying here and I certainly ain't working. So, go get me my money for my suburban, private school, and the some nice clothes so I can show up at pickup as the hot supermom.

And then he hits a certain age, wife hasn't touched him in years, regularly tells him whats wrong with him, and then is suprised when he gets to a point and says fuck this ? Turns around and there is someone that doesn't put him down all day every day, actually wants to talk to him and he's lonely and its like a gift from heaven.

Try loving your husband through all his faults - because we all have them. He can't quarantee you a live without problems just that he will work through them everyday with you. He doesn't want to be your roommate, he is not a pervert for wanting sex, and frankly he doesn't want to live with your Mother. So when she comes over, set some ground rules. Make your husband feel desired like only a women can, and he will be loyal like a puppy. Kick him all the day, every day, that dog is gonna bite. As well he should. Right in the fucking ass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. It's not Holly's weight or anything physical that made him cheat. You guys are overanalyzing the situation. He was offere some free P*ssy from an attractive woman and he took it (only it wasn't free and cost him everything). I'm sure he loves and respects his wife and thinks she's a great person/mother/etc. No matter how attractive my wife was, if a pretty woman was embedded with me and infatuated with me, it would be hard to turn her down. Just being honest.

LOL. Best post on this thread! Laughing cause all the women here are just fighting among themselves and throwing up theories, when the real story is just simple. It doesn't matter if Holly was the fittest, most beautiful, and most perfect woman around. If another woman is constantly hovering around her husband, there's a big chance that there'll be some cheating going on.

Why? 'Cause men, even almost 60 year old men, can't keep it in their pants?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are alot of women (not all) that once they get married figure they have the poor bastard by the balls and the rules change. They gain weight, on the phone with their Moms all the time and going shopping. You are the one that is supposed to stfu and pay for it all.

Now all your DWs are going to scream bloody murder but you know in your hearts of hearts - the wedding is the goal.

I tell all young adult men do not spoil your girlfriends. They are used to being pursued, used to you courting them and it sets the wrong dynamic for marriage. Once married, they feel like they are in control. They gain weight - fuck off. They don't want sex - fuck off. What are you gonna do - leave your family ? Want that job promotion in another state - fuck off - we are staying here and I certainly ain't working. So, go get me my money for my suburban, private school, and the some nice clothes so I can show up at pickup as the hot supermom.

And then he hits a certain age, wife hasn't touched him in years, regularly tells him whats wrong with him, and then is suprised when he gets to a point and says fuck this ? Turns around and there is someone that doesn't put him down all day every day, actually wants to talk to him and he's lonely and its like a gift from heaven.

Try loving your husband through all his faults - because we all have them. He can't quarantee you a live without problems just that he will work through them everyday with you. He doesn't want to be your roommate, he is not a pervert for wanting sex, and frankly he doesn't want to live with your Mother. So when she comes over, set some ground rules. Make your husband feel desired like only a women can, and he will be loyal like a puppy. Kick him all the day, every day, that dog is gonna bite. As well he should. Right in the fucking ass.

#NotAllWomen

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. It's not Holly's weight or anything physical that made him cheat. You guys are overanalyzing the situation. He was offere some free P*ssy from an attractive woman and he took it (only it wasn't free and cost him everything). I'm sure he loves and respects his wife and thinks she's a great person/mother/etc. No matter how attractive my wife was, if a pretty woman was embedded with me and infatuated with me, it would be hard to turn her down. Just being honest.

LOL. Best post on this thread! Laughing cause all the women here are just fighting among themselves and throwing up theories, when the real story is just simple. It doesn't matter if Holly was the fittest, most beautiful, and most perfect woman around. If another woman is constantly hovering around her husband, there's a big chance that there'll be some cheating going on.

Why? 'Cause men, even almost 60 year old men, can't keep it in their pants?

oh STFU. Apparently a 40-year old mother's of 2 with a great husband can't keep her panties up and her hands off a married man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are alot of women (not all) that once they get married figure they have the poor bastard by the balls and the rules change. They gain weight, on the phone with their Moms all the time and going shopping. You are the one that is supposed to stfu and pay for it all.

Now all your DWs are going to scream bloody murder but you know in your hearts of hearts - the wedding is the goal.

I tell all young adult men do not spoil your girlfriends. They are used to being pursued, used to you courting them and it sets the wrong dynamic for marriage. Once married, they feel like they are in control. They gain weight - fuck off. They don't want sex - fuck off. What are you gonna do - leave your family ? Want that job promotion in another state - fuck off - we are staying here and I certainly ain't working. So, go get me my money for my suburban, private school, and the some nice clothes so I can show up at pickup as the hot supermom.

And then he hits a certain age, wife hasn't touched him in years, regularly tells him whats wrong with him, and then is suprised when he gets to a point and says fuck this ? Turns around and there is someone that doesn't put him down all day every day, actually wants to talk to him and he's lonely and its like a gift from heaven.

Try loving your husband through all his faults - because we all have them. He can't quarantee you a live without problems just that he will work through them everyday with you. He doesn't want to be your roommate, he is not a pervert for wanting sex, and frankly he doesn't want to live with your Mother. So when she comes over, set some ground rules. Make your husband feel desired like only a women can, and he will be loyal like a puppy. Kick him all the day, every day, that dog is gonna bite. As well he should. Right in the fucking ass.

Speaking from personal experience?