I just don't like my husband anymore

[Anonymous]

This is a very old thread, but I'd love to hear an update from OP if she is still around DCUM. She posted a couple updates several years ago. Hope you're doing well, OP. I'm struggling with similar feelings (clearly from the replies, many others are too).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP,
Most of your discontent has to do with sex. It is mentioned over and over. How often are you getting it on now? Did you feel rejected when it was less and did that play into your feelings changing? His saying you have no problems or whatever sounds pretty dismissive. What IS working about your relationship? What are specific things you want from him and have you asked for them?

OP here. DH wants sex. I am the one who doesn't want it. When I was pregnant, I didn't want it either. I was too busy puking. I had terrible morning sickness all day and night.

I'm 33 and fairly attractive. I am back down to 120 pounds and a size 4. I can't help but think DH is not my soul mate and someone out there can make me happier. If it weren't for the kids, I would have left long ago. I don't doubt we can make it work in the short term but I am certain we won't last forever. If I know we will most likely separate, I would prefer to do it when I am still relatively young.

My unhappiness has little to do with sex. I am emotionally unhappy. Secondly, I feel like my sex drive is nonexistent. I am assuming my lack of physical attraction has to do with my mental dislike for my husband.

You sound like you have low grade depression or a hormonal imbalance. Go see dr and gyn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of the best advice I received shortly after I was married 7 years ago was that marriage is a journey. It is filled with peaks and valleys in the way that you feel about each other. Be patient. With your spouse and with yourself. This to will pass. If he has good qualities as you've said. It's especially hard when the kids are in the demanding ages and you have no sleep and no time. It gets better. Try to hold on and refocus your thoughts from a place of gratitude.

I got some bad advice like the above, except I didn't know I was in an abuse cycle. Once I told one trusted friend who ID'd it as abuse I planned my exit. Unf we already had kids. Divorcing an abuser is hell. But had to be done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP,
Most of your discontent has to do with sex. It is mentioned over and over. How often are you getting it on now? Did you feel rejected when it was less and did that play into your feelings changing? His saying you have no problems or whatever sounds pretty dismissive. What IS working about your relationship? What are specific things you want from him and have you asked for them?

OP here. DH wants sex. I am the one who doesn't want it. When I was pregnant, I didn't want it either. I was too busy puking. I had terrible morning sickness all day and night.

I'm 33 and fairly attractive. I am back down to 120 pounds and a size 4. I can't help but think DH is not my soul mate and someone out there can make me happier. If it weren't for the kids, I would have left long ago. I don't doubt we can make it work in the short term but I am certain we won't last forever. If I know we will most likely separate, I would prefer to do it when I am still relatively young.

My unhappiness has little to do with sex. I am emotionally unhappy. Secondly, I feel like my sex drive is nonexistent. I am assuming my lack of physical attraction has to do with my mental dislike for my husband.

Honestly, I would leave. This does not usually get better.