Why is everything so mediocre around me?(Warning: long rambling post)

[Anonymous]

We are in a well off suburb with a top state school district. Blue ribbon school.

But the district relies on Fountas Pinnell. My kindergartener couldn’t read. Her spelling is terrible. Now in 1st grade they are still working on 5+2 and 9-7. So I have to teach literacy and math at home. I’m sure I’ll have to start spelling and science soon.

I put her in a music school because she wanted an instrument. As the newest kid by far she objectively did the best at the recital (memorized the music, played with good tempo, actually performed) whereas kids who have been learning for much longer could barely read off their music stands, showed up wearing old sweats, and often had to restart the piece.

This will sound snobby. I know not everyone is the top at everything. But my kid is by no means a musical prodigy. She should not be at the top of the performance list, she is a good. She is in the top math group, but only because the classroom expectation is that she master 1-10 math facts, she is not an exceptional math talent. I love my kid and am proud, but realistically she is not a superstar.

Isn’t the 1st grade class standard behind? Is this music school bad? Should we move? Or is this just how things are even in coveted districts? I feel like during the preschool years everyone talked about enrichment and doing the best for kids. Everyone looked into specialized classes and were weirdly competitive about their babies. How can the elementary classroom and extracurricular experience be so mediocre in a wealthy, educated area? Is this why people are down on public schools and seek private? Or is this because I don’t live in the cutthroat areas of McLean and N Arlington? Is it different where you are?

[Anonymous]

I would love to know what good private school are teaching in 1st grade math. My guess is multiplication and starting to work with variables (X).

[Anonymous]

I have 100% moved my kids out of a music school where none of the older kids at the recital were any good. It's not an emergency, but you should start looking elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Most families are not child-achievement focused like yours. So no, they won't push their child to read, develop math fluency or practice their music.

You can hold your child to higher standards, have her do Beast Academy (best math program ever), look for a better private studio or better music school, and in doing so, you will find yourself in ever-smaller social circles of like-minded families.

Please be aware of where this might lead. Usually these families are also very interested in Ivy League colleges, and place great pressure on themselves in the high school years - and before that, to get their child prepared for a 4.8 weighted GPA, dozen APs with all 5s on the exams, perfect SAT score, superb extra curriculars, thoughtful essays, college application. And beyond that, they are interested in curating their childrens' education and path in life for maximum ROI.

I am one of these parents, with a college freshman, so I know. Life has a way of intruding on expectations and correcting them in the most humbling way But for those of us with that type of personality, it's very rewarding to pay that much attention to our kids.

[Anonymous]

Homeschool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would love to know what good private school are teaching in 1st grade math. My guess is multiplication and starting to work with variables (X).

I cannot tell if this is a joke.

I think it's second grade for basic multiplication at privates. But they do "blanks" for variables in 1st, sort of.

Our public district doesn't start multiplication until 3rd. In 2nd they top out at borrowing and carrying ("regrouping") with 2 digits...which is insanely slow. Legitimate variables are second half of 4th grade advanced math, which means regular 5th grade.

[Anonymous]

Maryland is finally going away from fountas and pinnell thank god. I think a lot of good districts got sucked into that. The math does seem a little behind, my first grader is doing double digit adding and subtracting but are you are they are not just reinforcing using logic and word problems?

[Anonymous]

Find where high achieving immigrants hang out. Seriously - RSM classes, private music teachers, etc. Your kid will at least know another peer group with higher expectations.

[Anonymous]

The way they do school nowadays is that kindergarten has the first grade curriculum, which is hard for a lot of children. Then first grade has the same first grade curriculum. Then second grade has the first grade curriculum to catch up all the kids who aren't there yet so they'll be ready for third grade, when real school starts. And the kids who are already there are bored while they wait.

[Anonymous]

My kid had a very serious piano teacher starting in K. I went looking for something, anything, she needed challenge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Find where high achieving immigrants hang out. Seriously - RSM classes, private music teachers, etc. Your kid will at least know another peer group with higher expectations.

Yeah this. I find the standards of high income wasp types are sort of mediocre regarding academics and music.

-
Raised by immigrants

[Anonymous]

Are you at private or public? I think at the early grades it’s impossible to get super far ahead in public school because the kids come in all over the place. Some kids don’t know their letters. Some kids are coming from a house where English wasn’t spoken regularly. Some kids went to private preschool and are reading fluently. The same teacher has to teach all those kids. It takes a while to get everyone reading and doing basic math. I don’t think it’s a problem. Let your kid be chill for a while they can do honors classes soon enough. If you have selected a private music teacher who seems incompetent that seems easy enough to change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would love to know what good private school are teaching in 1st grade math. My guess is multiplication and starting to work with variables (X).

I cannot tell if this is a joke.

I think it's second grade for basic multiplication at privates. But they do "blanks" for variables in 1st, sort of.

Our public district doesn't start multiplication until 3rd. In 2nd they top out at borrowing and carrying ("regrouping") with 2 digits...which is insanely slow. Legitimate variables are second half of 4th grade advanced math, which means regular 5th grade.

I am the PP you are responding to. Why would I be joking. I worked in a 2nd grade classroom several years ago and they were working on multiplication through arrays. This was public school, not a top public or private. I'm not sure what you mean by legitimate variables. My son completed testing for 1st grade math enrichment outside of school and the entrance quiz included X and Y. Of course, they aren't doing algebra. But they expected him to know "Joe has X apples and Mary has Y bananas. Show an equation that shows the total pieces of fruit they have."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would love to know what good private school are teaching in 1st grade math. My guess is multiplication and starting to work with variables (X).

I cannot tell if this is a joke.

I think it's second grade for basic multiplication at privates. But they do "blanks" for variables in 1st, sort of.

Our public district doesn't start multiplication until 3rd. In 2nd they top out at borrowing and carrying ("regrouping") with 2 digits...which is insanely slow. Legitimate variables are second half of 4th grade advanced math, which means regular 5th grade.

I am the PP you are responding to. Why would I be joking. I worked in a 2nd grade classroom several years ago and they were working on multiplication through arrays. This was public school, not a top public or private. I'm not sure what you mean by legitimate variables. My son completed testing for 1st grade math enrichment outside of school and the entrance quiz included X and Y. Of course, they aren't doing algebra. But they expected him to know "Joe has X apples and Mary has Y bananas. Show an equation that shows the total pieces of fruit they have."

Nowadays, common core and Virginia have multiplication as a third grade skill. Before common core, some schools started multiplication in second grade but now that is very rare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would love to know what good private school are teaching in 1st grade math. My guess is multiplication and starting to work with variables (X).

I cannot tell if this is a joke.

I think it's second grade for basic multiplication at privates. But they do "blanks" for variables in 1st, sort of.

Our public district doesn't start multiplication until 3rd. In 2nd they top out at borrowing and carrying ("regrouping") with 2 digits...which is insanely slow. Legitimate variables are second half of 4th grade advanced math, which means regular 5th grade.

I am the PP you are responding to. Why would I be joking. I worked in a 2nd grade classroom several years ago and they were working on multiplication through arrays. This was public school, not a top public or private. I'm not sure what you mean by legitimate variables. My son completed testing for 1st grade math enrichment outside of school and the entrance quiz included X and Y. Of course, they aren't doing algebra. But they expected him to know "Joe has X apples and Mary has Y bananas. Show an equation that shows the total pieces of fruit they have."

OK, when you said X I assumed you meant a basic linear equation with solve for X (like 5X + 2 = 12).