Why is everything so mediocre around me?(Warning: long rambling post)

[Anonymous]

If starting violin lessons at 3 is what you expect, then you are on your own. I don't think that is realistic or reasonable. Just send your kids to a math supplement program and find a good music teacher/school that will go however far and fast your DC can do. Why do you have to complicate it? Take her to museums, travel, attend cultural events. No need to fixate on how fast she is learning math in 1st grade....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Find where high achieving immigrants hang out. Seriously - RSM classes, private music teachers, etc. Your kid will at least know another peer group with higher expectations.

Yeah this. I find the standards of high income wasp types are sort of mediocre regarding academics and music.

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Raised by immigrants

I was raised by immigrants and I see things really differently. I think immigrants pound the creativity out of their children with rote memorization. I think Wasps recognize that not everyone is a genius and no amount of pressure or forced math practice is going to turn their mediocre child into one. I think Wasps realize the point of learning piano is to have a fun hobby and sometimes play a song for your friends at get togethers throughout the course of your life, not to impress your mom’s friends or foster her delusion that you have a chance to play professionally at Carnegie Hall.

I think Wasps actually have a much better handle on how to promote creativity and invention than recent immigrants do. That’s why we wanted to be here and not wherever we came from. And didn’t Anglos invent penicillin, the plane, the computer, the telephone, air conditioning, etc.? I’d say they know what they’re doing, no?

Nope, see who is winning all the innovation awards in USA right now:
https://science-fair.org/2023/11/03/thermo-fisher-scientific-jic-announces-2023-winners/#:~:text=Congratulations%20to%20Adyant%20Bhavsar%2C%2013,version%20of%20a%20triboelectric%20nanogenerator.

https://www.invent.org/collegiate-inventors/finalists

To be smart first you have to have facts pounded in your head at a young age so you understand the basic grammar of each kind of subject and have a solid foundation. Then your creativity will thrive based on what you already knew. In the western world we used to know that until the "education innovators" started ruining everything as early as the 19th century.

I am European/Asian and I agree with this. Only stupid people think creativity is stifled by intellectual rigor. It’s the opposite, but you don’t necessarily see the fruits of your labor until the student is an adult and successful in their chosen career and hobbies. Creativity isn’t measured by coloring outside the lines at 4. It’s about inventing something meaningful later in life. You get there with intellectual rigor and cognitive challenge.

[Anonymous]

I live in an area where the public schools are 100% free lunch, and the private schools are just slightly better academically. The better educated parents tend to send their kids to public and provide or pay for supplementals.

An idea would be to stay in your current public school area and pay for your kid to go to the "rich" area for one or two high quality lessons. Or, send them to summer camps with the quality you like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would love to know what good private school are teaching in 1st grade math. My guess is multiplication and starting to work with variables (X).

My son is in first grade in public and learning those things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would love to know what good private school are teaching in 1st grade math. My guess is multiplication and starting to work with variables (X).

That describes our Montessori’s expectation for 1st grade, and some kids started multiplication in K.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To be smart first you have to have facts pounded in your head at a young age, so you understand the basic grammar of each kind of subject and have a solid foundation. Then your creativity will thrive based on what you already knew. In the western world we used to know that until the "education innovators" started ruining everything as early as the 19th century.

+1. In the early years, any DC needs to have a strong foundation of facts, ability to read well, and ability to do math well. All of those boil down to memorization.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Move to Lake Wobegon, where everyone is above average.

The DCUM website already is lakeside.

[Anonymous]

OP’s choices are to move to a school zone with higher expectations, move to a challenging private/parochial school, or sign up to supplement Phonics, reading, spelling, grammar, math, and the other academic subjects. Maybe homeschool is an option too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be smart first you have to have facts pounded in your head at a young age, so you understand the basic grammar of each kind of subject and have a solid foundation. Then your creativity will thrive based on what you already knew. In the western world we used to know that until the "education innovators" started ruining everything as early as the 19th century.

+1. In the early years, any DC needs to have a strong foundation of facts, ability to read well, and ability to do math well. All of those boil down to memorization.

No, spelling and phonic are about memorization, but if taught correctly, math is about inquire. The art of inquire is far more important than memorization. Sadly, Tiger parent’s can’t seem to grasp that, probably on account of their own stunted development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP’s choices are to move to a school zone with higher expectations, move to a challenging private/parochial school, or sign up to supplement Phonics, reading, spelling, grammar, math, and the other academic subjects. Maybe homeschool is an option too.

OP here. No to homeschool. I am not a teacher and it’s part of my frustration. I know teachers have studied for years to teach. Their hands are probably tied because of the set curriculum, administration, state and national testing, etc etc. But we are in what is supposed to be a top district and I’m sitting here trying to research literacy methods and teaching DD phonics and spending hours and lots of money trying to find curricular resources to teach things I’m not qualified to teach. I feel like phonics, spelling, math past 1-9 are all things they should be learning in kindergarten through 1st. Why am I spending hours looking through G-O method vs balanced literacy, researching ed articles about Lucy Caulkins, and trying to look through TPT and other state curriculums to see how math is being taught?

The same with music. I put in my hours every single week helping DD practice and take notes during lessons in an instrument I do not play, and find the top music is school is faffing about enrolling 8 and 9 year olds who have never touched an instrument. I am not personally one to put kids on an instrument at 3 or 4, but yes I do expect the top music school in the area to enroll students that young. Where are the 4 year old violinists if they aren’t in my area? Just NY and Seattle and LA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be smart first you have to have facts pounded in your head at a young age, so you understand the basic grammar of each kind of subject and have a solid foundation. Then your creativity will thrive based on what you already knew. In the western world we used to know that until the "education innovators" started ruining everything as early as the 19th century.

+1. In the early years, any DC needs to have a strong foundation of facts, ability to read well, and ability to do math well. All of those boil down to memorization.

No, spelling and phonic are about memorization, but if taught correctly, math is about inquire. The art of inquire is far more important than memorization. Sadly, Tiger parent’s can’t seem to grasp that, probably on account of their own stunted development.

Like everything else, math is about inquiry after you get the facts down. I was schooled by a drill and kill math curriculum (speed drills for the win!) and made it through differential equations and have higher degrees and a career in a STEM subject.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be smart first you have to have facts pounded in your head at a young age, so you understand the basic grammar of each kind of subject and have a solid foundation. Then your creativity will thrive based on what you already knew. In the western world we used to know that until the "education innovators" started ruining everything as early as the 19th century.

+1. In the early years, any DC needs to have a strong foundation of facts, ability to read well, and ability to do math well. All of those boil down to memorization.

No, spelling and phonic are about memorization, but if taught correctly, math is about inquire. The art of inquire is far more important than memorization. Sadly, Tiger parent’s can’t seem to grasp that, probably on account of their own stunted development.

Early math facts are about memorization. Multiplication tables need to be memorized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP’s choices are to move to a school zone with higher expectations, move to a challenging private/parochial school, or sign up to supplement Phonics, reading, spelling, grammar, math, and the other academic subjects. Maybe homeschool is an option too.

OP here. No to homeschool. I am not a teacher and it’s part of my frustration. I know teachers have studied for years to teach. Their hands are probably tied because of the set curriculum, administration, state and national testing, etc etc. But we are in what is supposed to be a top district and I’m sitting here trying to research literacy methods and teaching DD phonics and spending hours and lots of money trying to find curricular resources to teach things I’m not qualified to teach. I feel like phonics, spelling, math past 1-9 are all things they should be learning in kindergarten through 1st. Why am I spending hours looking through G-O method vs balanced literacy, researching ed articles about Lucy Caulkins, and trying to look through TPT and other state curriculums to see how math is being taught?

The same with music. I put in my hours every single week helping DD practice and take notes during lessons in an instrument I do not play, and find the top music is school is faffing about enrolling 8 and 9 year olds who have never touched an instrument. I am not personally one to put kids on an instrument at 3 or 4, but yes I do expect the top music school in the area to enroll students that young. Where are the 4 year old violinists if they aren’t in my area? Just NY and Seattle and LA?

Why are you at a music school instead of with a challenging private teacher, as PPs up-thread said? I recently had to decide not to enroll my DC with several different private teachers because DC practices regularly but is merely learning the instrument for fun/musical appreciation and doesn't have enough hours to devote to the lesson and performance requirements the teachers had. And we are in a merely moderate SES, moderate performing area.

As far as the instruction thing, yeah, that's modern public education for you. You school your kids in the summer and after school. It's pretty miserable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be smart first you have to have facts pounded in your head at a young age, so you understand the basic grammar of each kind of subject and have a solid foundation. Then your creativity will thrive based on what you already knew. In the western world we used to know that until the "education innovators" started ruining everything as early as the 19th century.

+1. In the early years, any DC needs to have a strong foundation of facts, ability to read well, and ability to do math well. All of those boil down to memorization.

No, spelling and phonic are about memorization, but if taught correctly, math is about inquire. The art of inquire is far more important than memorization. Sadly, Tiger parent’s can’t seem to grasp that, probably on account of their own stunted development.

Nope, RSM and AoPS are exactly about inquiry, and not about memorization and drill/kill like Kumon and Mathnasium. Here's a white paper on the topic: https://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/ED593886.pdf

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be smart first you have to have facts pounded in your head at a young age, so you understand the basic grammar of each kind of subject and have a solid foundation. Then your creativity will thrive based on what you already knew. In the western world we used to know that until the "education innovators" started ruining everything as early as the 19th century.

+1. In the early years, any DC needs to have a strong foundation of facts, ability to read well, and ability to do math well. All of those boil down to memorization.

No, spelling and phonic are about memorization, but if taught correctly, math is about inquire. The art of inquire is far more important than memorization. Sadly, Tiger parent’s can’t seem to grasp that, probably on account of their own stunted development.

Absolutely false, and that’s why public math education sucks. You cannot “inquire” your way into the math foundation needed to do Algebra. That’s leaving kids behind, except the ones who are naturally talented at math or get outside tutoring. Math “inquiry” is the same type of pernicious cr*p as “whole language”.