Monday's Most Active Threads

The most active thread yesterday was titled, "Does this Taylor Swift fling with the NFL football brute seem super fake?" and posted in the "Entertainment and Pop Culture" forum. Like the countless British Royal Family threads, Taylor Swift threads could easily take over the entertainment forum. Unlike the BRF threads, however, Taylor Swift threads rarely result in waves of inappropriate posts that require constant intervention. Indeed, about the only complaint I ever get about Taylor Swift threads is that there are too many of them. The posters themselves seem to be extremely well-behaved. Plus, they can take a joke. This particular thread is about Swift's apparent relationship with Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce. Posters are convinced that the relationship is contrived and not authentic. The reasoning, as best I can tell, is that Kelce does not fit the image that fans have for a Swift boyfriend. Some posters argue that this is a means for Swift to bolster her popularity with "flyover country". I know very little about Taylor Swift, but even so I am fairly certain that popularity is the least of Swift's concerns. As posters point out, she is able to fill a stadium within in minutes of ticket sales opening. Some posters see Kelce as little more than a dumb jock who is far from suitable for Swift. Others rush to Kelce's defense and point out a number of factors that could make him appealing to Swift. I simply had to marvel at some of the motivations posters ascribed to Swift. My favorite was a poster who argued that by dating Kelce, Swift is hoping to appeal to the "Tens of millions of men" who have fantasy football teams and convince them that it is okay to listen to Taylor Swift records. But, the goal is not to simply to sell music, but to swing general elections. Unbeknownst to me, listening to Taylor Swift apparently makes you vote a certain way. I am a bit surprised about how even Swift's most loyal fans seem to view her as manipulative and conniving, with her every move being planned out for public relations purposes. The most charitable among them are convinced that she is simply gathering material for future songs.

The second most active thread yesterday was posted in the "Tweens and Teens" forum and titled, "15 year old hanging with adults all night- is this normal?". The original poster says that she and her husband have three children under 11. They invited another couple that has one younger child and one 15 year old over for dinner. While the younger kids spent their time playing separately from the parents, the 15 year old stayed with the adults for the entire evening. She behaved appropriately, but the original poster felt that it dampened the evening for her. She wants to know if this is normal or not. There is general agreement that a 15 year old would not want to hang out with kids who are 11 and younger, but there is disagreement about whether it was normal for the girl to socialize with the adults rather than not coming to dinner in the first place. One of the divisive factors in this thread is the view posters have of 15 year olds. Some, like the original poster, view them as "boring and pedantic" and are put off by the thought of spending an evening with them. Others see them as close to being adults and fully capable of adult conversations. Moreover, many of these posters value the opportunity to interact with teens and have nothing but praise for those who choose to converse with adults rather than burying themselves in their phones. More than one poster pointed out the contradiction of adults complaining that kids lack social skills while simultaneously preferring that teens go off to play video games rather than socialize with adults. In addition, several posters stress that when you invite guests, you should expect to entertain all of them rather than counting on teens to disappear. A number of posters suggested that the original poster invite the family only when the teen was not available or stress that the evening was for adults only. For her part, the original poster was not very receptive to advice that was contrary to her own opinion and accused posters of being judgemental, a shocking allegation to make about DCUM posters.

Third was a thread titled, "My DS wants to be a musician. WWYD?" and also posted in the "Tweens and Teens" forum. The original poster says that his brother is a very successful touring musician who has amassed several million dollars of wealth at age 39. The original poster's 15-year-old son spent the summer with his uncle and now has decided that he wants to be a musician as well. The boy devotes himself to practicing guitar and writing music while neglecting school work. The original poster has explained to his son that the odds are against him being successful in music and the original poster's wife blames him for letting their son spend time with his uncle. The original poster's brother doesn't want to get involved in the family drama. The general tone of the responses is that the original poster should not squash his son's dreams, but also should guide him in a way so that his eggs don't end up in one basket. Almost everyone agrees that there should be an expectation that the boy graduate from high school, but opinions about education beyond that are divided. Some see college as providing a means for a backup plan while others see little value in it. Posters are divided about which type of response would best motivate the original poster's son to take school seriously. Some suggest taking his guitar away unless he does well in school. Others, especially those involved in playing music, argue that is the worst thing that could be done. They favor a carrot approach in which the original poster promises full support for his son in exchange for doing well in school. The original poster later explained that his son currently practices about 6 hours a day and even more on weekends. This led to a debate about the value of such practice. Some posters claimed that this amount is unnecessary while others, again most of them being actual musicians, argued that it was normal. One of my favorite guitar players, Tom Morello, routinely claims that aspiring guitar players should play at least 8 hours a day. So, I am inclined to side with the musicians on this point. There really is no agreement on what the original poster should do other than find some way — and there is definitely no agreement on which way that should be — to get his son to complete high school. Others advise that the son should be encouraged to develop related skills that might allow him to work in the music industry if being a musician didn't work out.

The final thread at which I'll look today was posted in the "College and University Discussion" forum. Titled, "Does anyone here NOT want their kids to attend an Ivy?", the original poster says that she attended a "SLAC" — which I believe stands for Selective Liberal Arts College — and then received a PhD at a top Ivy League school. Based on her experiences at the Ivy, she prefers that her kids attend a SLAC rather than an Ivy League university and asks if there are others with similar opinions. During most of my experience in the college forum, there has generally been a strong bias against SLACs. So, it is somewhat surprising how favorable toward SLACs most of the responses are in this thread (at last from what I've read of it). SLACs are praised for being nurturing environments in contrast to the overly competitive Ivy League schools. A surprising number of posters with first-hand experience at Ivies don't want their kids to choose that path. But, some of the forum's traditional SLAC detractors do make an appearance and argue against the schools. Most of this thread is simply posters arguing either in favor or against one of the two options. I'm not sure that any points that haven't repeatedly been argued in earlier threads come up, but if you are new to the SLAC vs Ivy debate, this is a good introduction.