I could never take a mother away from her children. Sorry. |
How would you feel if you didn't get a job with the reason being you have kids and whoever was hiring felt you should stay at home with them and not work? |
Let your nanny make the decision. This is her family, her life and her choice. Do not patronize her by taking on ANY guilt for her choices - she is your kid's nanny and you are not her mother. But be willing to let her quit gracefully and go home if she is too homesick. |
Agree. Many FSO families bring their nannies with them for 2-3 years. Talk to them,,not dcum. Foreign service officers. |
Ripping nuclear families apart is not nice. |
+1 |
How would you feel if your nanny left behind orphaned children to care for you? Imagine her pain. |
How would you feel if your nanny's children had to quit school and go without food because you declined to hire her against her expressly stated wishes? |
I would offer her the position + simply leave it up to her whether or not she would like to come.
In our culture, it seems very mean to leave your own children to care for another person's...Esp. in another country. But perhaps I am simply being ethnocentric about it. If she feels moving w/your family is the right choice for her, then I wouldn't worry too much about her children. That is for her to deal with separately. |
Ignore the trolling or ignorant poster who keeps bringing up slavery. She has no idea what slavery is. I think you have to respect your nanny's wishes and not make the decision for her. If she is wonderful and wants to move with you, then go ahead and do it. Discuss with her your concerns about her children if that would make you better understand her decision, and make sure you are prepared, emotionally, if she should change her mind after she gets her and wishes to return home. That's all you can really do. GL. |
OP is offering her nanny a free choice. She is not insisting nanny comes to the US, and she will not, presumably, take nanny against her will.
If this nanny decides that the chance to secure a better financial future is worth the loss of seeing her children daily, that is her decision to make, and to suggest otherwise is beyond patronizing. |
I am currently a nanny who works in Abu Dhabi (last year I was in Dubai). It is very common here for Indian, Sri Lankan and phillipinos to come here and leave their families for two years to be a housemaid or nanny. They do this because they can make 4 times the salary here than they can in their home country. Our last housekeeper had a son doing his last year of school and her wages were paying for this. I'm not saying that it is right but that is how it is.
To the OP if you do decide to take your nanny with you please sit down and be very clear about the conditions upon which you are taking her with you. How long for? Will you be flying her back at the end of her contract? I would ask if she has thought it through - she won't see her children for a long time all those milestones missed! If she does decide to come please encourage her to find a group of friends because moving to a new country and working in a house (so no workmates/coworkers) can be lonely! jessi |