Ask nanny reference for pay rate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had our nanny for nearly 4 years, until our kids didn't need her anymore. A few times during our time together she would look into other jobs to see if something better was out there. When I got calls from people asking about a reference I would always say we paid her much less than we actually did. So either these families passed on her because they felt she wasn't worth as much as she was probably asking or they made her a low offer based on what I said I was paying. Either way it worked out and she stuck around until we didn't need her.

I should point out that at the end when the kids outgrew her I did give her a wonderful recommendation and told people exactly what we had paid her all 4 years. She quickly found new job.

You're evil. Truly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had our nanny for nearly 4 years, until our kids didn't need her anymore. A few times during our time together she would look into other jobs to see if something better was out there. When I got calls from people asking about a reference I would always say we paid her much less than we actually did. So either these families passed on her because they felt she wasn't worth as much as she was probably asking or they made her a low offer based on what I said I was paying. Either way it worked out and she stuck around until we didn't need her.

I should point out that at the end when the kids outgrew her I did give her a wonderful recommendation and told people exactly what we had paid her all 4 years. She quickly found new job.

We love our nanny, and I have worried what would happen if she started looking to see what else is out there since we aren't millionaires. This is a great idea. We treat her well so I don't think its doing her a disservice and when it is time to part ways I will try to help her as best I can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I don't get informative and truthful references about you I won't hire you.
If you give me someone who only has fluff to say, I'll think they are stupid themselves.
I always talk to the mother and the father on separate calls, and ask for details of job, hours, vacation, pay, their experience/history with nannies in general, one thing they wish could have been tweaked, timeliness, communication skills and style, etc.

Wow.

Well, I'll make it easy then:

I work for single parents, and I have one email address and one phone number for those references. For the few dual parent households, they select who my reference is, and I give that ONE person's information. I have one family who switches, and they let me know who to list (due to job hours). There's no way that I would ever hand over contact information for both parents in a dual parent household so that they can be interrogated. That's asking for my references to not take calls anymore!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had our nanny for nearly 4 years, until our kids didn't need her anymore. A few times during our time together she would look into other jobs to see if something better was out there. When I got calls from people asking about a reference I would always say we paid her much less than we actually did. So either these families passed on her because they felt she wasn't worth as much as she was probably asking or they made her a low offer based on what I said I was paying. Either way it worked out and she stuck around until we didn't need her.

I should point out that at the end when the kids outgrew her I did give her a wonderful recommendation and told people exactly what we had paid her all 4 years. She quickly found new job.

We love our nanny, and I have worried what would happen if she started looking to see what else is out there since we aren't millionaires. This is a great idea. We treat her well so I don't think its doing her a disservice and when it is time to part ways I will try to help her as best I can.

Wow! I would go from just looking to an outright search, with no intention of giving you notice when I found a position. If I found out that my employer was doing that, I would preemptively take my current contract with me to talk numbers after the new family talked to my current family. I don't lie about anything to my employer, and I don't tolerate lying to or about me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had our nanny for nearly 4 years, until our kids didn't need her anymore. A few times during our time together she would look into other jobs to see if something better was out there. When I got calls from people asking about a reference I would always say we paid her much less than we actually did. So either these families passed on her because they felt she wasn't worth as much as she was probably asking or they made her a low offer based on what I said I was paying. Either way it worked out and she stuck around until we didn't need her.

I should point out that at the end when the kids outgrew her I did give her a wonderful recommendation and told people exactly what we had paid her all 4 years. She quickly found new job.

We love our nanny, and I have worried what would happen if she started looking to see what else is out there since we aren't millionaires. This is a great idea. We treat her well so I don't think its doing her a disservice and when it is time to part ways I will try to help her as best I can.

No, you clearly don't "love" you nanny. Congrats you're a horrible person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. It is question that you should not ask. The nanny has a rate that she quoted you - what difference does it make how much she was paid at one point in the past? She is coming to your position with more experience.

As an MB who loved my children's nanny, I would tell you off if you asked me that question.

As would I. Furthermore, I would contact nanny and tell her what you did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had our nanny for nearly 4 years, until our kids didn't need her anymore. A few times during our time together she would look into other jobs to see if something better was out there. When I got calls from people asking about a reference I would always say we paid her much less than we actually did. So either these families passed on her because they felt she wasn't worth as much as she was probably asking or they made her a low offer based on what I said I was paying. Either way it worked out and she stuck around until we didn't need her.

I should point out that at the end when the kids outgrew her I did give her a wonderful recommendation and told people exactly what we had paid her all 4 years. She quickly found new job.

We love our nanny, and I have worried what would happen if she started looking to see what else is out there since we aren't millionaires. This is a great idea. We treat her well so I don't think its doing her a disservice and when it is time to part ways I will try to help her as best I can.

No, you clearly don't "love" you nanny. Congrats you're a horrible person.

I'm a nanny and this is exactly what your nanny deserved; how could she be so dense as to put down her current employer as a reference? Even if MB was 100% honest and said "she's an amazing nanny but I'm hurt that she didn't tell me she was looking for employment elsewhere and didn't even tell me she was giving out my contact info as a reference...." that would be potentially just as bad to hear from a prospective employer as simply lying about her wages. If she was smart enough she wouldn't have used you as a reference, so that's on her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Would it be cool to ask a nanny's reference how much they paid her? Or is that a no-no?

I've had former employers size you up and tell me everything you asked, and share their opinion of you.