Do families usually allow nanny to do personal shopping on paid time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient, develop poise while learning to interact appropriately with the general public, develop self-confidence while becoming acclimated to all different kinds of retail environments, help find products being shopped for, help read the labels to compare ingredients and cost, safely navigate crosswalks and parking lots, self-entertain to avoid boredom as a car passenger, cultivate listening skills in order to enjoy listening to various entertainment while on the road, etc.

There is a huge difference between running errands for family and running nanny's errands.

If it's for family - that's ok.

Nanny's private staff is not something I am willing to pay for.

So really it has nothing to do with your children or what is best for them. It's your contempt for your nanny and not wanting her to feel entitled to anything, least of all stopping by the bank or post office.

Though none of you MB's ever do ANYTHING on your company's time...all these DCUM posts must be on your days off.

It must be fun to be so self-righteous.

You had me until the bolded part. Why do so many people on DCUM do that? Stop lumping all MBs together. I know you don't like it if an MB says something negative about "all you nannies." I'm an MB who posted earlier that I had no problem with our nanny running errands with the kids. You aren't helping your cause by making all MBs out to be bad.

You are right, and my apologies. I hate being lumped into the group of horrible nannies just as much as you must be lumped into the horrible MB's. This thread, unfortunately, like many of the others was overwhelmingly dominated by women who have little regard for anything but what their nanny is doing on "their time". I will choose my words more carefully in the future though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient, develop poise while learning to interact appropriately with the general public, develop self-confidence while becoming acclimated to all different kinds of retail environments, help find products being shopped for, help read the labels to compare ingredients and cost, safely navigate crosswalks and parking lots, self-entertain to avoid boredom as a car passenger, cultivate listening skills in order to enjoy listening to various entertainment while on the road, etc.

There is a huge difference between running errands for family and running nanny's errands.

If it's for family - that's ok.

Nanny's private staff is not something I am willing to pay for.

So really it has nothing to do with your children or what is best for them. It's your contempt for your nanny and not wanting her to feel entitled to anything, least of all stopping by the bank or post office.

Though none of you MB's ever do ANYTHING on your company's time...all these DCUM posts must be on your days off.

It must be fun to be so self-righteous.

Please.. Don't tell me that running personal errands at CVS is best for my children

I run my company and I'm my own boss so I can do whatever I want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient, develop poise while learning to interact appropriately with the general public, develop self-confidence while becoming acclimated to all different kinds of retail environments, help find products being shopped for, help read the labels to compare ingredients and cost, safely navigate crosswalks and parking lots, self-entertain to avoid boredom as a car passenger, cultivate listening skills in order to enjoy listening to various entertainment while on the road, etc.


There is a huge difference between running errands for family and running nanny's errands.

If it's for family - that's ok.

Nanny's private staff is not something I am willing to pay for.


So really it has nothing to do with your children or what is best for them. It's your contempt for your nanny and not wanting her to feel entitled to anything, least of all stopping by the bank or post office.

Though none of you MB's ever do ANYTHING on your company's time...all these DCUM posts must be on your days off.

It must be fun to be so self-righteous.


You had me until the bolded part. Why do so many people on DCUM do that? Stop lumping all MBs together. I know you don't like it if an MB says something negative about "all you nannies." I'm an MB who posted earlier that I had no problem with our nanny running errands with the kids. You aren't helping your cause by making all MBs out to be bad.


You are right, and my apologies. I hate being lumped into the group of horrible nannies just as much as you must be lumped into the horrible MB's. This thread, unfortunately, like many of the others was overwhelmingly dominated by women who have little regard for anything but what their nanny is doing on "their time". I will choose my words more carefully in the future though.

NP on this thread but I have to give you so much credit, PP, for recognizing how important words are and being a force for positive change here.

You are made of awesome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient, develop poise while learning to interact appropriately with the general public, develop self-confidence while becoming acclimated to all different kinds of retail environments, help find products being shopped for, help read the labels to compare ingredients and cost, safely navigate crosswalks and parking lots, self-entertain to avoid boredom as a car passenger, cultivate listening skills in order to enjoy listening to various entertainment while on the road, etc.

There is a huge difference between running errands for family and running nanny's errands.

If it's for family - that's ok.

Nanny's private staff is not something I am willing to pay for.

So really it has nothing to do with your children or what is best for them. It's your contempt for your nanny and not wanting her to feel entitled to anything, least of all stopping by the bank or post office.

Though none of you MB's ever do ANYTHING on your company's time...all these DCUM posts must be on your days off.

It must be fun to be so self-righteous.

You had me until the bolded part. Why do so many people on DCUM do that? Stop lumping all MBs together. I know you don't like it if an MB says something negative about "all you nannies." I'm an MB who posted earlier that I had no problem with our nanny running errands with the kids. You aren't helping your cause by making all MBs out to be bad.

You are right, and my apologies. I hate being lumped into the group of horrible nannies just as much as you must be lumped into the horrible MB's. This thread, unfortunately, like many of the others was overwhelmingly dominated by women who have little regard for anything but what their nanny is doing on "their time". I will choose my words more carefully in the future though.

I'm the PP you quoted and I really appreciate your apology. I agree many of the posts on this thread are frustrating and I understand your desire to get your point across.

[Anonymous]

So it would be a problem whether it was a stop at CVS to buy a bottle of water? Or to swing by the post office to drop an envelope in the box? Some of you really belive that's enough to expose your baby to the plague and ruin their secure attachment o their caregiver? Ok, if you believe that then I see hy you would throw a tantrum over this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient, develop poise while learning to interact appropriately with the general public, develop self-confidence while becoming acclimated to all different kinds of retail environments, help find products being shopped for, help read the labels to compare ingredients and cost, safely navigate crosswalks and parking lots, self-entertain to avoid boredom as a car passenger, cultivate listening skills in order to enjoy listening to various entertainment while on the road, etc.

There is a huge difference between running errands for family and running nanny's errands.

If it's for family - that's ok.

Nanny's private staff is not something I am willing to pay for.

So really it has nothing to do with your children or what is best for them. It's your contempt for your nanny and not wanting her to feel entitled to anything, least of all stopping by the bank or post office.

Though none of you MB's ever do ANYTHING on your company's time...all these DCUM posts must be on your days off.

It must be fun to be so self-righteous.

Please.. Don't tell me that running personal errands at CVS is best for my children

I run my company and I'm my own boss so I can do whatever I want.

You obviously have lots of learning to do. GL.

[Anonymous]

Its inappropriate for a nanny to be taking an infant out solely to run the nanny's errands. The only exception would be if the nanny was working extremely long hours and had discussed it with the mom boss. Even then, a quick errand to a place only open during these times is appropriate but building in all your errands during your working hours is just wrong. Many people do their regular grocery shopping on the weekends, there is not reason that OP's nanny can't do her grocery shopping on the 3 days she isn't working for the OP.

If a nanny works with older kids who she is shuttling around to activities then it should be fine if she stops off on the way to pick up something quickly.

[Anonymous]

There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient,

Children can also learn patience while the nanny takes on more housework at the employer's home. Oh wait....in this situation developing patience in a child is not in the best interest of the child. Clearly, the difference is that something is ONLY beneficial to the child if the nanny is doing something that benefits the nanny.

[Anonymous]

Yesterday I took my charge (18mo) to a library story time. Walking from the library back to the car we pass a pet store and I realized I was out of cat food. DC pushed the cart and proudly carried one bag of food up to the front for me. We looked at all the stuffed animals, practiced greetings as we arrived and departed, named different colors on the cans as we walked the aisle, bought the food, and left. Probably took 8 minutes and she was happy as a clam the entire time, exploring this new space and smiling at all the staff. After that we got into the car and went home for lunch, stories, and naptime.

Yes, it was in my best interests to make that stop, but I'd love for someone to reasonably and logically explain any harm that trip did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient,

Children can also learn patience while the nanny takes on more housework at the employer's home. Oh wait....in this situation developing patience in a child is not in the best interest of the child. Clearly, the difference is that something is ONLY beneficial to the child if the nanny is doing something that benefits the nanny.

+1

This is what I mean. They can learn patience while cleaning toys or loading a dishwasher with nanny. They really don't have to go to CVS to learn patience..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient,

Children can also learn patience while the nanny takes on more housework at the employer's home. Oh wait....in this situation developing patience in a child is not in the best interest of the child. Clearly, the difference is that something is ONLY beneficial to the child if the nanny is doing something that benefits the nanny.

+1

This is what I mean. They can learn patience while cleaning toys or loading a dishwasher with nanny. They really don't have to go to CVS to learn patience..

Do you have children? Because asking a one or two yo to entertain themselves with their toys and books while you empty the dishwasher is completely different from asking them to stand in line at a store, use an indoor voice, and conduct themselves appropriately in public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient,

Children can also learn patience while the nanny takes on more housework at the employer's home. Oh wait....in this situation developing patience in a child is not in the best interest of the child. Clearly, the difference is that something is ONLY beneficial to the child if the nanny is doing something that benefits the nanny.

+1

This is what I mean. They can learn patience while cleaning toys or loading a dishwasher with nanny. They really don't have to go to CVS to learn patience..

Do you have children? Because asking a one or two yo to entertain themselves with their toys and books while you empty the dishwasher is completely different from asking them to stand in line at a store, use an indoor voice, and conduct themselves appropriately in public.

Yes, I do. And they don't entertain themselves with their toys but help me or nanny to empty the dishwasher.

They stand in line in a store with me on weekends. They don't have to do it with nanny. And they don't have to participate in running nanny's personal errands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient,

Children can also learn patience while the nanny takes on more housework at the employer's home. Oh wait....in this situation developing patience in a child is not in the best interest of the child. Clearly, the difference is that something is ONLY beneficial to the child if the nanny is doing something that benefits the nanny.

+1

This is what I mean. They can learn patience while cleaning toys or loading a dishwasher with nanny. They really don't have to go to CVS to learn patience..

Do you have children? Because asking a one or two yo to entertain themselves with their toys and books while you empty the dishwasher is completely different from asking them to stand in line at a store, use an indoor voice, and conduct themselves appropriately in public.

My DC runs errands with me on the weekend, so he gets lots of practice standing in line at a store, using an indoor voice, and conducting himself appropriately in public. He also helps me unload the dishwasher, cleans up after meals, and helps "fold" the laundry. Making those activities fun and interesting for him all require the same level of engagement - having him pick out apples and put them in the cart, vs. having him pull out all the red clothes for me to fold. If you assume unloading a dishwasher requires you to ignore a one or two year old, it's hard not to assume you are similarly ignoring the same one or two year old when you drag him around running your own errands - engaging kids is the same, wherever you are doing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is a lot to be said for children (at least, age 3 and above) simply accompanying adults as they go through the various errands of the day... they learn to be patient,

Children can also learn patience while the nanny takes on more housework at the employer's home. Oh wait....in this situation developing patience in a child is not in the best interest of the child. Clearly, the difference is that something is ONLY beneficial to the child if the nanny is doing something that benefits the nanny.

+1

This is what I mean. They can learn patience while cleaning toys or loading a dishwasher with nanny. They really don't have to go to CVS to learn patience..

Do you have children? Because asking a one or two yo to entertain themselves with their toys and books while you empty the dishwasher is completely different from asking them to stand in line at a store, use an indoor voice, and conduct themselves appropriately in public.

My DC runs errands with me on the weekend, so he gets lots of practice standing in line at a store, using an indoor voice, and conducting himself appropriately in public. He also helps me unload the dishwasher, cleans up after meals, and helps "fold" the laundry. Making those activities fun and interesting for him all require the same level of engagement - having him pick out apples and put them in the cart, vs. having him pull out all the red clothes for me to fold. If you assume unloading a dishwasher requires you to ignore a one or two year old, it's hard not to assume you are similarly ignoring the same one or two year old when you drag him around running your own errands - engaging kids is the same, wherever you are doing it.

+1

EXACTLY ! Thank you PP.

[Anonymous]

No employer ever tried to tell me what to do. In fact, they give me envelopes of cash to do what I want to do. And they love how their kid is at the end of the day. Happy, rested, and brilliant, of course!