Nanny too close?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You guys are so drmatic. God forbid your nanny love your kid which is what she was hired to do. This is why I left the industry bc the parents always ruin it.

Upon closer introspection I did not realize this was an old thread.

The OP promised to come back and provide an update and never did so I am hoping this was an oversight on her part and this was not a fake post.

[Anonymous]

I am noticing that some posters are reactivating old threads by posting those with the same dates but different years.

The eyes can be tricky.

[Anonymous]

She should absolutely not post pictures of your kids on Facebook. The weekend stuff is creepy. I think she is too attached to your kids. Not sure I would keep her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would love some outside opinions on my current nanny situation. Let me begin by saying overall she is wonderful. She has watched my daughter since she was 4 mos old and she is almost 3 now. She definitely cares for my daughter, but is there such thing as too close? I'm having difficulties keeping an employer/employee relationship and she continues to get "too comfortable" as her caretaker. She truly seems more like an aunt or grandparent who spoils her instead of an employee.

Some examples of her not listening - I have repeatedly asked that my daughter not be given treats (cookies, ice cream etc) and continue to find out that she is giving them. She even has asked on a few occasions when I get home if she can take her out for ice cream really quick (After I'm home!!!!). I also come home at the exact same time every day, but often have to call to find out where they are (usually the park).

Some examples of her seeming "too close" - she buys toys and things for her all the time with her own money, and is always texting etc on the weekends to ask about her. She asks all the time if her and her boyfriend can "borrow" my daughter on the weekend to take her to things or for sleep overs (free of charge). (I always say no, even though it's free babysitting!) Today when she got to our house after the long weekend, she ran in with presents and said "My baby!" It was like fingernails on a chalkboard to me.

I am not sure if it's just me being jealous that someone else loves my daughter that much, or if my reactions are legitimate. Let me be clear that I do not think my daughter is in any danger or harm. It just weirds me out how her and her boyfriend are both so in love with her that they want to babysit for free on their weekends! They are in their early 30's and should want to do things on their own!

Thoughts? Should I just consider myself lucky that I have someone who cares for her like family, or would it seem strange to you too?

Your nanny is more of a mother to your child than you. See sees your child for most of her waking hours, you don't. Undoubtedly, your child also prefers the nanny to you. I was a child brought up by a nanny and I was devastated when she died but didn't shed a tear when parent died. What do you think happens when your child is your accessory child? You should be beyond grateful that your child has someone that she knows loves her unconditionally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks so much for your responses. It really helps to hear some unbiased opinions. I will definitely have a talk with her. There are so many other examples I didn't list that just reinforce the lack of personal and work boundaries. I just looked at her public facebook profile (we are not friends on facebook) and it is full of pictures of her with my daughter calling her "my baby love" etc. I'm glad she loves her, but it is just too close for my comfort.

That’s a hard no. Parents can post pictures, but nannies should not.