Thinking of hiring Au Pair but worried because husband works from home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 22:54. The thing is, there's a difference between what I intellectually know is true and what I emotionally feel. DH and I have been together 15 years. He's never, ever given me a single moment's doubt. I'm in the happiest marriage of anyone I know and he's a freaking saint. I don't think for ONE SECOND that he would behave inappropriately toward the au pair. I don't think he would throw his life away, as you say. But emotionally? I would just as soon not hire the hottest, thinnest, most charming 19 year old on the planet who is all grabby-hands to come live in my house for a year. I get it, it's my insecurity and I should grow up. But there are far too many other choices in an au pair match... I can skip the ones that make me feel like crap just by looking at them.

Longtime HM here. I can assure you that "the hottest, thinnest, most charming 19 year old on the planet who is all grabby-hands" has zero interest in your (or my) 35-40+ year old husband, no matter how hot we may think our hubbies are. Seriously. These young women are 19 - NINETEEN! They aren't interested in our husbands at all. They are more apt to be interested in the high school lacrosse player who lives next door.

We are now hosting our second male AP, and I have to say, I very much enjoy the abs walking around my house, as I know my husband enjoyed the bodies that walked around our house the last several years when we hosted females. But that doesn't mean I have the slightest interest in these YOUNG, YOUNG men who are our au pairs. They are less than half my age. Nor did my husband have the slightest interest in our 19 or 22 or even 25 year old APs. And even if he did or we did - we are older than these APs' parents!!!

[Anonymous]

Hi, just tell the Au Pair to go out to caddie's around 9 pm a couple nights a week. I'll be there to woo her and just make sure you sound proof the room when she brings me back to your place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you can turn this issue around and consider hiring an AP for both you and your husband to enjoy?

This is the way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have a 1.5 year old and a new baby on the way and we've been talking about hiring an Au Pair. Husband is completely on board with it but I'm a little worried because my husband works full time from home. Granted he works long hours but still his office is at home. My office is only 10 mins away but im gone pretty much 8-5 mon thru fri and on-call which may require me to be away from home one day a week. Has anyone else had this concern? How do you address it? I trust my husband, I don't quite know how to trust the au pair though.

So you know that your husband won't be coming on to her, but you think she'll be attempting to seduce him at every turn? Right. Because all hot young Brazilian chicks are just DYING to bang a middle aged, married, father of two who doesn't even have the funds to hire a proper live out nanny. Dream on.

They will for that green card.

[Anonymous]

Why? Is he a flirt?

[Anonymous]

We had make au pairs who slept with probably half of the elementary school teachers (married and unmarried).

One nailed our neighbor.

They came back to visit a couple of times and told us their stories- said it was best years of their life.

[Anonymous]

Bad situation. Don't do it. You are putting your husband in a possibly bad situation. Even if nothing happens, au pair could claim that something did and it would be her word against your husband if anything went south. Find an alternative.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:an 18 mo and a new born is a lot for an au pair anyway.
You should hire someone older with more experience than an au pair.

This. Don’t be stupid.