Vacation

[Anonymous]

I’m a nanny and have been for 25ish years. DH and I usually vacation in May and October. I always inform MB of the dates 2-3 months before. The grandparents always cover while I’m out. This woman has been bugging me about vacation since Thanksgiving! It’s an every week question. I’ve explained to her between the holidays, my mom visiting and we just moved that I haven’t had the time to plan. Her response is always a rude “ok”.


Employers, how much notice do you expect to receive for vacation time? Nannies, how much notice do you give? I really feel I give plenty and previous families have never had an issue with 2-3 months notice.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like they want to plan a vacation too, and they want you to use your vacation days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like they want to plan a vacation too, and they want you to use your vacation days.

I’ve asked if that’s the case! The answer is no. DB doesn’t want the oldest to miss school. So I am not sure what the deal is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like they want to plan a vacation too, and they want you to use your vacation days.

I’ve asked if that’s the case! The answer is no. DB doesn’t want the oldest to miss school. So I am not sure what the deal is.

Maybe this family doesn't have grandparents that can just cover for your vacation. Even if they have before, maybe some circumstances have changed (and maybe they are personal and the family doesn't want to discuss it with you.)
Maybe the only way for this family to have coverage for your trip is to have the child visit friends/family at THEIR location (causing the oldest to miss school.) Maybe they are hoping with more advance notice they will be able to figure something else out and that won't have to happen.

[Anonymous]

You sound rude, op. The grandparents have been nice to cover for when you're off. They are asking for more notice, there's nothing wrong with that.
We're in January, don't you already know what you will do in May?

Nanny-

[Anonymous]

I’d ask MB how much notice she wants, if the contracted amount of notice is no longer sufficient. And if it needs to change, I’d be happy to look through the contract and see if we need to change anything else at the same time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound rude, op. The grandparents have been nice to cover for when you're off. They are asking for more notice, there's nothing wrong with that.
We're in January, don't you already know what you will do in May?

Nanny-

I wouldn’t know yet, wouldn’t have even started looking yet. I also plan vacation 2-3 months prior, so that’s February-March. At roughly 3 months prior, I look through options. Then, around 2.5 months, I present my nf with 2 or 3 weeklong options to pick whichever is most convenient for them. They have until the 2 month point (for the first option) to pick, or I pick.

[Anonymous]

I work for a high profile and very social couple. My vacation times are submitted and approved a year in advance. It has to be with my employers schedules.

[Anonymous]

Your employers clearly need you to decide sooner. Decide sooner.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you have a pretty narrow window, why don't you want to commit to dates? It's not like anything major is going to change, you know which days of the week have cheaper airfare, etc etc

[Anonymous]

If the grandparents are flying in, the flights are cheaper in advanced.

[Anonymous]

We ask for two months advance notice. We give four weeks vacation, and it's agreed that two of those weeks will be taken by the nanny when we are on vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your employers clearly need you to decide sooner. Decide sooner.

+1. Your employers are not making an unreasonable request. Nanny here and you need to give on this and comply.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We ask for two months advance notice. We give four weeks vacation, and it's agreed that two of those weeks will be taken by the nanny when we are on vacation.

Then you do not give her four weeks. Vacation is when she wants to go not your convenience.

[Anonymous]

If your vacations are always at the same time each year, then your employers might think you have these times set far in advance and just don’t want to tell them for some reason. We ask for 2 weeks notice if it’s just a couple days off and 4 weeks if it’s longer, because we don’t want to be overly restrictive and can generally make things work with that minimum amount of notice. However if our nanny *always* gave the absolute minimum notice despite taking vacations at the same times every year, I would be a little irked as well and maybe ask for more notice going forward, because we’d always have to ask grandparents to rearrange their schedule with short notice and pay for relatively last minute tickets so they can come over.
I think instead of continuing to have these terse conversations that are unproductive, next time this comes up you can ask how much notice they are hoping to have, if there are certain dates that are harder for them to work with (such as when the kid would miss school vs not), or any blackout dates that will be really difficult for them. And also share your timeline, like “hey my husband and I won’t be able to plan this and confirm until early feb, can I let you know by feb15 what week in May I want off?”