Parents planning fall trip. Advice?

[Anonymous]

MB & DB just came up to me and asked if I could keep the kids for a week while they go out of the country for the fall. My first answer was No because my 30th birthday is coming up when they have the trip planned and I want to do something for my birthday because I haven't done anything in years, due to working all the time. MB is tying to apply pressure, by saying "it would be nice if you could consider this, and maybe celebrate another time." Once again my answer is no, plus I have other issues and concerns, I do not have a car, I live within walking distance to them, so that's how I get to their home everyday. So transportation would be an issue if an emergency were to occur, also DB will be in meetings so he wouldn't be able to answer his cell, and MB barely keeps her cell around her, which leaves me in a horrible place considering they have a handful of children and one is SN. My question is, should I search for another job or just explain my issues to MB & DB?

[Anonymous]

Why not do it and make extra money and plan your bday the next weekend?? Unless they're not offering good money I think you're short sighted. Make extra overnight pay and overtime, then go away for your bday.

[Anonymous]

You have presented two separate issues, OP: One, you want to celebrate your birthday. Two, the safety of the children.

One is bullshit - who the hell cares what day you celebrate your birthday! Grow up. The following weekend or the preceding weekend will be equally special.

Two, is your only real issue in my mind. The safety of the children must come first. Can you drive, OP? Have you ever driven their cars with kids in the back? In the case of an emergency you would call 911. Make sure you have medical proxy (you can make medical decisions for the children). Changes are that nothing will happen but it is always good to have what-if plans in your head.

My stay-over rate is my travel rate and it's pretty great. I would take the job if you can work out all the safety issues.

[Anonymous]

U,, it's her 30th? I wouldn't want to look after kids either

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why not do it and make extra money and plan your bday the next weekend?? Unless they're not offering good money I think you're short sighted. Make extra overnight pay and overtime, then go away for your bday.

Why shouldn't she be able to celebrate her birthday when she chooses? OP, stick to your guns and enjoy your birthday celebration. Or, you could tell her you will do this for $1,000/day payable in ADVANCE in cash or
certified check. This should shut her up fast

[Anonymous]

Do you not drive the kids as it is?

If your answer is no, it's no. If you give them a lot of reasons why it will be difficult, they will set about trying to solve those problems, and then you will feel obligated to do it, or really piss them off when you say "no" anyway. So just say no for the real reason, which is your birthday.

However, unless you really dislike these kids and this job, I don't get giving up a windfall just to celebrate on a particular day. You have tons of notice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:U,, it's her 30th? I wouldn't want to look after kids either

Ridiculous children... It's a day. You aren't five anymore. Do you think other professionals take off on their birthdays when there is work that needs to be done?! "I'm sorry, I can't perform your emergency surgery because today is my birthday...". "I'm afraid that fiscal report will have to be late because it's due on my birthday."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have presented two separate issues, OP: One, you want to celebrate your birthday. Two, the safety of the children.

One is bullshit - who the hell cares what day you celebrate your birthday! Grow up. The following weekend or the preceding weekend will be equally special.

Two, is your only real issue in my mind. The safety of the children must come first. Can you drive, OP? Have you ever driven their cars with kids in the back? In the case of an emergency you would call 911. Make sure you have medical proxy (you can make medical decisions for the children). Changes are that nothing will happen but it is always good to have what-if plans in your head.

My stay-over rate is my travel rate and it's pretty great. I would take the job if you can work out all the safety issues.

OP here, so it's bullshit because I choose to celebrate my birthday??, I think it's fair considering I never ask for days off, I come in everyday on time and work hard, I've worked with this family for over 5 years and I've accepted overnights twice before while parents went on week long vacations and discovered they are not what I like doing, I have to balance 4 children all which are not babies, practically old enough to take care of themselves and it is very tiring and stressful. So why not take ONE day off to celebrate my birthday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:U,, it's her 30th? I wouldn't want to look after kids either

Ridiculous children... It's a day. You aren't five anymore. Do you think other professionals take off on their birthdays when there is work that needs to be done?! "I'm sorry, I can't perform your emergency surgery because today is my birthday...". "I'm afraid that fiscal report will have to be late because it's due on my birthday."

5, 21, 30, 50. If someone feels they deserve a day to enjoy themselves after working so much, why not let them enjoy that. Just shut up and let OP have that day. Clearly she seems like a hard worker and don't ask for much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you not drive the kids as it is?

If your answer is no, it's no. If you give them a lot of reasons why it will be difficult, they will set about trying to solve those problems, and then you will feel obligated to do it, or really piss them off when you say "no" anyway. So just say no for the real reason, which is your birthday.

However, unless you really dislike these kids and this job, I don't get giving up a windfall just to celebrate on a particular day. You have tons of notice.

OP here, yes I have them everyday, it's gotten to a point that I am
Burnt out, because I have them everyday while MB and DB are working and then when they come home, they want time to themselves, and the kids hardly see their parents, and now they want to take a trip out of the country without the kids. I feel bad for them also, and saying No is for multiple reasons, one to give myself a break, two so the kids can spend time with their parents, and three, I am burnt out and need a break. Because I will be pretty much working waking which are from 4:30 am-9 PM Mon-Fri if they take this vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why not do it and make extra money and plan your bday the next weekend?? Unless they're not offering good money I think you're short sighted. Make extra overnight pay and overtime, then go away for your bday.

Why shouldn't she be able to celebrate her birthday when she chooses? OP, stick to your guns and enjoy your birthday celebration. Or, you could tell her you will do this for $1,000/day payable in ADVANCE in cash or
certified check. This should shut her up fast

[b]

I've been with the same family for 8 years. You're probably one of those nannies constantly job hopping because you are short sighted and not flexible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have presented two separate issues, OP: One, you want to celebrate your birthday. Two, the safety of the children.

One is bullshit - who the hell cares what day you celebrate your birthday! Grow up. The following weekend or the preceding weekend will be equally special.

Two, is your only real issue in my mind. The safety of the children must come first. Can you drive, OP? Have you ever driven their cars with kids in the back? In the case of an emergency you would call 911. Make sure you have medical proxy (you can make medical decisions for the children). Changes are that nothing will happen but it is always good to have what-if plans in your head.

My stay-over rate is my travel rate and it's pretty great. I would take the job if you can work out all the safety issues.

OP here, so it's bullshit because I choose to celebrate my birthday??, I think it's fair considering I never ask for days off, I come in everyday on time and work hard, I've worked with this family for over 5 years and I've accepted overnights twice before while parents went on week long vacations and discovered they are not what I like doing, I have to balance 4 children all which are not babies, practically old enough to take care of themselves and it is very tiring and stressful. So why not take ONE day off to celebrate my birthday.

[Anonymous]

You do realize that your arguemrnt of you can't drive in an emergency is going to backfire on you right? Ok you can't stay with the kids for the trip because of 'emergencies' then why should they keep you during the week if there's an emergency?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You do realize that your arguemrnt of you can't drive in an emergency is going to backfire on you right? Ok you can't stay with the kids for the trip because of 'emergencies' then why should they keep you during the week if there's an emergency?

I've been with this family for over 3 years, they've kept me around this long, even when emergencies occurred, one of the children is special needs, it's hard enough to take care of that child alone, and then have to homeschool the others while MB & DB are away. It's tough. I've already make it clear to MB before, that I'm not willing to do overnights any more because they burn me out, the children seem to not cooperate when parents are not around, and it's difficult trying to balance everything and everyone with only one pair of hands. MB is a SAHM so she's usually there to help. It now she's planning a trip, I don't think I can handle. Call it what you want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why not do it and make extra money and plan your bday the next weekend?? Unless they're not offering good money I think you're short sighted. Make extra overnight pay and overtime, then go away for your bday.

Why shouldn't she be able to celebrate her birthday when she chooses? OP, stick to your guns and enjoy your birthday celebration. Or, you could tell her you will do this for $1,000/day payable in ADVANCE in cash or
certified check. This should shut her up fast

[b]

I've been with the same family for 8 years. You're probably one of those nannies constantly job hopping because you are short sighted and not flexible.

i am not a nanny.