Have you ever hated your MB? Like hard core?

[Anonymous]

How did you cope with realizing that your personalities just don't jive? Or maybe they are just a shitty person. Has anyone had any experience with that?

[Anonymous]

Yeah. But I didn't have to deal with her much. Maybe 30 min in the morning and 30 in the evening. Eventually I moved on but something about her just rubbed me the wrong way.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I have. There was one who was a completely different person during the interview phase to what she turned into after a couple of weeks. Looking back, some of her behavior during the hiring process should've been a red flag, like her extremely complimentary way with me, she kept emailing me days apart asking me to call her to see if I was still available to start even after agreeing to take the job. This checking in behavior continued even through the first few weeks of employment, she would text or call the night before, usually after 10pm, I was scheduled to make sure I was coming the next day, I finally asked why, and apparently this woman has had many people stop showing up in the mornings. I worked there for another couple weeks while she got crazier and crazier (accusing me of breaking things, telling me I was fucking nosy because I brought the kids to play in a different part of the house, screaming horrible names at her child, yelling, and swearing at me, taunting me, posting the job multiple times to admittedly find someone cheaper who would do more around the house).

I finally confronted the mom about the behavior and planned to give my notice, but the conversation went horribly and she completely went off the deep end and starting screaming and yelling and getting in my face all while her children were present and my baby was in my arms! I ended up leaving right then and coming back a few days later to give her husband the key who apologized profusely.

I would venture a guess that this woman's craziness causes her issues with turnover.

[Anonymous]

Yes I had a crazy one about 6mo ago. Bizarre behavior and totally demented. Luckily it was the first time in over 10 years as a nanny that I truly detested a boss. Hopefully this was just a bad experience op. Move on and look forward you will be happier in the long run.

[Anonymous]

I'd being leaving if I find there's a shitty parent.

[Anonymous]

Ugh I had the worst host when I was an au pair in Europe. The WORST. And I was 18 and stuck in a foreign country because, along with all her personality issues, she wouldn't pay me our agreed upon weekly pocket money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh I had the worst host when I was an au pair in Europe. The WORST. And I was 18 and stuck in a foreign country because, along with all her personality issues, she wouldn't pay me our agreed upon weekly pocket money.

Yup, me too.
I was a bit older and I got paid on time but that was about the only positive aspect. Hating your MB as a live-in doesn't work for long.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I have worked for families where I cannot stand being around the parent.

And that is the main reason I no longer am employed by them.

[Anonymous]

Yep. I was in a share once where I couldn't stand one set of parents who also happened to be the host family. It was like someone had given a couple of teenagers a baby and a crap ton of money. They were selfish and lazy and would throw money at any problem so they had time to play their video games. They paid me late all the time, threw temper tantrums, and so many mornings I came in to the two of them playing computer games while their 10 month old fussed to be held from the pack N play. I still have them the courtesy of 3 weeks notice upon leaving and they threw an epic fit threatening to sue me.

[Anonymous]

Yes it was with a lazy stay at home mom (or should u say, shop online and eat all day mom). I had zero respect for her. She only paid attention to the kids when the husband was around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes it was with a lazy stay at home mom (or should u say, shop online and eat all day mom). I had zero respect for her. She only paid attention to the kids when the husband was around.

This ^^^ it's the worst! Mine would actually go out saying she had "meetings" and come home with shopping bags. She said she worked P/T hired me for almost 40 hours a week, and prob only worked 10 hours a month. (At a bs hobby) she called a job. She would stroll in and out telling the poor kid "mommy loves you" give them a quick kiss and leave again. The kid was in tears for the first 6mo I worked there, the was finally okay with it and a year later she let me go bc kid didn't want me to leave at the end of the day. It was so sad

[Anonymous]

Nice of PP to judge "a BS hobby she called a job," when that is probably what paid her (nanny's) salary!

[Anonymous]

It's funny, I had one MB who was really "the worst" in many ways; this was years ago when I was young and naive and didn't know enough to ask for a contract or guaranteed hours. She was constantly changing the schedule last minute, often telling me when I arrived in the morning she'd be home by 7, then I'd get a text at 9pm "sorry, heading home soon," and she'd roll in around midnight. That happened often, or other times she would text me the night before and say she didn't need me at all the next day, and I wouldn't get paid for it. They never paid OT rates either. Worst of all, towards the end of our three years together, she stopped paying me on time. I ultimately had to threaten to sue to get the $2000 I was owed (and had been owed for over six weeks).

But, somehow, I still "liked" her. She was a real people person, even though she blatantly took advantage of me in many ways, she always knew just what to say to put a smile on my face. She also really trusted me, always talked about how much she appreciated me, and included me in family events and parties in a way that really made me feel like part of their family. Also, although sometimes she would go out shopping and return home with bags of clothes from Macy's, I know that she did work hard and that towards the end they were having some money trouble (although it was more of a matter of them prioritizing other, nonessential, things over paying me, their money struggles were real).

But, I did have a MB who...ugh, hate is a really strong word, but I really, REALLY disliked her, I really feel like she is not a good person in the way that she treats "the help." She was never late in paying me, though she did tend to nickel and dime me. She never forgot my birthday, but every year would give me only a card scribbled on by her son (my charge). It was a nice gesture, I suppose, but there was never actually any "gift" involved. She also never offered to give me the day off or let me go early on my birthday (not that I'd necessarily expect that, but perhaps in lieu of an actual gift..). There was never any actual Christmas bonus either; one year my Christmas gift was a jar of jam, the next year it was a kitchen towel (literally).

They didn't pay me particularly well from the start (I had just moved to a new city and felt somewhat desperate for a job and unsure of local competitive rates, so I just went for it, knowing they were well off and I'd likely get raises), and my package only included 5 days PTO per year. They did give me raises, but every year they would offer me 50 cent raises with no room for negotiation. If I had started off at a good rate this would've been fine, but I was not being paid well so 50 cents really wasn't good enough. They gave me guaranteed hours, but I rarely got time off, they did a lot of weekends away where they'd leave right at 4pm on Friday and return Sunday night or Monday morning so I wouldn't get full days off while they were gone (I know they did this solely because of me and not because they needed to get back to work, because they both worked for the highly successful family business, owned by DBs parents, which was primarily run by DBs dad and brother and other employees; MB and DB mostly "worked from home" which involved a lot of reiki and massage appointments and online shopping, and fishing trips on DBs part). They also asked me to work on major holidays, like Thanksgiving, New Years Day and Christmas Eve (although they did stop short of asking me to come in on Christmas Day), even though they really didn't need me, I'm certain it's because they wanted to get their money's worth.

MB saw guaranteed hours as transferable, and started asked me to change my Friday hours from 8am-4pm to 4pm-12am once a month so they could go out on the town. I tried to tell her this wasn't okay but she would just go on about how the guaranteed hours never made sense to her anyway ("why are you getting paid if you're not working?" Which is a question I would've loved to ask HER), and make veiled threats about finding a more flexible nanny.

And yeah, the biggest issue I had was sitting there watching her nickel and dime me, while they live in their million dollar home and buy new Mercedes SUVs every year, have new anthropologie and j crew packages arrive daily, and find out bits and pieces here and there from the charge like "daddy is a pilot and just bought a brand new plane" (at first I thought charge was making this up but later found out it was true), and "this weekend we're going back to our condo at the beach," or "one of mommy's horses is sick..." (Apparently the grandparents farmhouse in the country had not only a large vineyard but also a stable with several horses owned by each of the family members; towards the end of my career with them I was invited out to see it once. I thought I was being invited as a guest but MB and DB just stuck me in a back room most of the time with their son and his little cousin while they ate a fancy dinner in the dining room.)

My only regret with that family is (of course) that I didn't quit sooner. Saying goodbye to them and moving on to my next (current) MB and DB is the best thing I've ever done for my career and overall happiness!

[Anonymous]

On Feb this year I worked with this first time mom. She want me to text pictures of her baby every 30 minutes! She will text me like 20 message a day! She keep checking on me like she got nothing to do at her office.

After only two weeks I quit! Hahahhahahhaha!!!

[Anonymous]

I would never and will never put up with someone yelling at my especially a parent or my boss in front of children. Uncalled for completely. I would give a weeks notice just for that and then leave. Uncalled for.