Trying to be generous here, but nanny is late and wearing inappropriate clothes to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd let the clothing issue go. The timing issue would bother me. Also, I would not hire anyone who I can not communicate with.

A friend's nanny overdosed her toddler because she misunderstood medication directions.

I am never late. I told our nanny I would be home by 6pm, because I knew I'd leave at 5 and get home around 5:30. This gives me a buffer of a half hour.

But you pay until 6, right?

Yes, the nanny's hours go until 6. This way if a meeting runs late or I need to stop to do an errand on the way home, I can, without stressing about angering the nanny.

I’m sure your nanny appreciates your promptness but it’s not just about “angering the nanny”. Your child is waiting for you, too. It’s so cruel when parents make their kids insecure and fearful about “where’s mama?” And “”when my mama be home”.

NP- How you get that from the last comment is seriously mind-boggling. You are just looking for reasons to find fault.

NP here. No, the only reason the PP gave for being on time was her nanny’s mood.

I know that, for myself as a nanny, having a heartbroken charge waiting for her constantly late mother was much harder on me than my being disrespected.

How would the child know?

NP here. My former employer was often late and my then three-year-old charge knew by our schedule. I gave her dinner at 5:30 and her mother was supposed to be home at 5:30. It did upset my Sweet charge when her mom was late.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd let the clothing issue go. The timing issue would bother me. Also, I would not hire anyone who I can not communicate with.

A friend's nanny overdosed her toddler because she misunderstood medication directions.

I am never late. I told our nanny I would be home by 6pm, because I knew I'd leave at 5 and get home around 5:30. This gives me a buffer of a half hour.

But you pay until 6, right?

Yes, the nanny's hours go until 6. This way if a meeting runs late or I need to stop to do an errand on the way home, I can, without stressing about angering the nanny.

I’m sure your nanny appreciates your promptness but it’s not just about “angering the nanny”. Your child is waiting for you, too. It’s so cruel when parents make their kids insecure and fearful about “where’s mama?” And “”when my mama be home”.

NP- How you get that from the last comment is seriously mind-boggling. You are just looking for reasons to find fault.

NP here. No, the only reason the PP gave for being on time was her nanny’s mood.

I know that, for myself as a nanny, having a heartbroken charge waiting for her constantly late mother was much harder on me than my being disrespected.

How would the child know?

NP here. My former employer was often late and my then three-year-old charge knew by our schedule. I gave her dinner at 5:30 and her mother was supposed to be home at 5:30. It did upset my Sweet charge when her mom was late.

Most kids don’t have that kind of handoff. Ime, either the nanny always feeds dinner or there’s no expectation that dinner is immediately after a parent gets home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've hired a very sweet nanny who is from another country.

Her first day, she showed up two hours early. I had asked her to come at 2PM, she showed up at 12. I chalked it up to a possible language barrier and moved on.

Her second day, she was late 7 mins with no text or call to let me know.

Her third day, she was only 3 minutes late. But she showed up to work wearing a black see through blouse and a black bra underneath and her midriff is showing.

I'm a single mom, so i'm not worried about a husband oogling her. But it makes me uncomfortable that she's showing up late and not in appropriate clothes! We are just in the trial period. I was going to give it two more days that I have asked her and if nothing changes I'll just have my mom watch my son next week.

Please tell me i'm not crazy over 3-7 minute lateness and inappropriate clothing?

You ARE crazy, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd let the clothing issue go. The timing issue would bother me. Also, I would not hire anyone who I can not communicate with.

A friend's nanny overdosed her toddler because she misunderstood medication directions.

I am never late. I told our nanny I would be home by 6pm, because I knew I'd leave at 5 and get home around 5:30. This gives me a buffer of a half hour.

But you pay until 6, right?

Yes, the nanny's hours go until 6. This way if a meeting runs late or I need to stop to do an errand on the way home, I can, without stressing about angering the nanny.

I’m sure your nanny appreciates your promptness but it’s not just about “angering the nanny”. Your child is waiting for you, too. It’s so cruel when parents make their kids insecure and fearful about “where’s mama?” And “”when my mama be home”.

NP- How you get that from the last comment is seriously mind-boggling. You are just looking for reasons to find fault.

NP here. No, the only reason the PP gave for being on time was her nanny’s mood.

I know that, for myself as a nanny, having a heartbroken charge waiting for her constantly late mother was much harder on me than my being disrespected.

How would the child know?

NP here. My former employer was often late and my then three-year-old charge knew by our schedule. I gave her dinner at 5:30 and her mother was supposed to be home at 5:30. It did upset my Sweet charge when her mom was late.

Most kids don’t have that kind of handoff. Ime, either the nanny always feeds dinner or there’s no expectation that dinner is immediately after a parent gets home.

Just be on time, PP. You don’t want to be that parent whose child is picked up last from school and worries that Mama and Daddy aren’t coming. NP here and I’m never late because my mother was always late and it was awful for me.

[Anonymous]

My mom was always the last for pick up too at school and many other places. One time the principal had to call her to come pick me up. Other times she had to be called when the birthday party was over and I was the only kid left at the host's house.

I still think about those experiences til this day. I was never ever late to pick up my own kid. I don't ever want her wondering about me when she is an adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom was always the last for pick up too at school and many other places. One time the principal had to call her to come pick me up. Other times she had to be called when the birthday party was over and I was the only kid left at the host's house.

I still think about those experiences til this day. I was never ever late to pick up my own kid. I don't ever want her wondering about me when she is an adult.

There’s a huge difference between a visible end (when everyone else leaves) vs an invisible end time (unless the nanny is standing by the door with purse and jacket in hand, the child shouldn’t be aware of the difference... and bringing a parent’s tardiness to a child’s attention is highly unprofessional).

[Anonymous]

I have my own family to get home to and make dinner for. The 3rd time my employer was late I told her we need to re-set my working hours and pay me for them, or she needs to stick to the original agreement. It just took a straightforward conversation. We agreed I would stay til 5:30 not 5:00.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was always the last for pick up too at school and many other places. One time the principal had to call her to come pick me up. Other times she had to be called when the birthday party was over and I was the only kid left at the host's house.

I still think about those experiences til this day. I was never ever late to pick up my own kid. I don't ever want her wondering about me when she is an adult.

There’s a huge difference between a visible end (when everyone else leaves) vs an invisible end time (unless the nanny is standing by the door with purse and jacket in hand, the child shouldn’t be aware of the difference... and bringing a parent’s tardiness to a child’s attention is highly unprofessional).

Just be on time. It’s not hard. It’s better for everyone.

-signed, MB

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was always the last for pick up too at school and many other places. One time the principal had to call her to come pick me up. Other times she had to be called when the birthday party was over and I was the only kid left at the host's house.

I still think about those experiences til this day. I was never ever late to pick up my own kid. I don't ever want her wondering about me when she is an adult.

There’s a huge difference between a visible end (when everyone else leaves) vs an invisible end time (unless the nanny is standing by the door with purse and jacket in hand, the child shouldn’t be aware of the difference... and bringing a parent’s tardiness to a child’s attention is highly unprofessional).

Just be on time. It’s not hard. It’s better for everyone.

-signed, MB

It's not always possible, due to the types of positions that employers may have.

-signed, a nanny (PP)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I cannot handle lateness. I am NEVER late and neither is our nanny. We discussed this in our interview.

Nanny is lovely and older and dressed appropriately for a nanny.

I would definitely talk to your nanny about the need for promptness.

Uniform? Polo shirt that says “property of MB”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot handle lateness. I am NEVER late and neither is our nanny. We discussed this in our interview.

Nanny is lovely and older and dressed appropriately for a nanny.

I would definitely talk to your nanny about the need for promptness.

Uniform? Polo shirt that says “property of MB”?

Stop embarrassing yourself with ridiculous comments. If you don’t know what an appropriate wardrobe is at your age, no one can help you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was always the last for pick up too at school and many other places. One time the principal had to call her to come pick me up. Other times she had to be called when the birthday party was over and I was the only kid left at the host's house.

I still think about those experiences til this day. I was never ever late to pick up my own kid. I don't ever want her wondering about me when she is an adult.

There’s a huge difference between a visible end (when everyone else leaves) vs an invisible end time (unless the nanny is standing by the door with purse and jacket in hand, the child shouldn’t be aware of the difference... and bringing a parent’s tardiness to a child’s attention is highly unprofessional).

Just be on time. It’s not hard. It’s better for everyone.

-signed, MB

It's not always possible, due to the types of positions that employers may have.

-signed, a nanny (PP)

It is possible to be on time save for the very unusual emergency Do your employers arrive at flight departures and important meetings on time? Yes.

I’ve been a nanny to two surgeons who had a back up plan if they were both ever in surgeries they couldn’t leave. They prioritized my time. They were never once late. If they can do it, anyone can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was always the last for pick up too at school and many other places. One time the principal had to call her to come pick me up. Other times she had to be called when the birthday party was over and I was the only kid left at the host's house.

I still think about those experiences til this day. I was never ever late to pick up my own kid. I don't ever want her wondering about me when she is an adult.

There’s a huge difference between a visible end (when everyone else leaves) vs an invisible end time (unless the nanny is standing by the door with purse and jacket in hand, the child shouldn’t be aware of the difference... and bringing a parent’s tardiness to a child’s attention is highly unprofessional).

Just be on time. It’s not hard. It’s better for everyone.

-signed, MB

It's not always possible, due to the types of positions that employers may have.

-signed, a nanny (PP)

It is possible to be on time save for the very unusual emergency Do your employers arrive at flight departures and important meetings on time? Yes.

I’ve been a nanny to two surgeons who had a back up plan if they were both ever in surgeries they couldn’t leave. They prioritized my time. They were never once late. If they can do it, anyone can.

I’ve worked for employers who got home between 8 and 11 every night, but would have no idea exactly when until they actually walked out the door. I’ve worked with employers who might have an hour’s notice that they needed to be on a plane across the country, meaning I’m staying overnight because the other parent works in another state during the week. Some employers really have no clue when they will get home.

Fwiw, I’ve worked for doctors twice. The second is a neurosurgeon, and barring the motorcyclist sans helmet who tangled with a pickup, she was NEVER late. The first family was frequently late, but he was an ER doctor and she was a resident, so...

Please try to remember that there are families that conform to the same mold as everyone else. They just need a nanny who is more understanding and flexible, and they need to be willing to pay for that understanding and flexibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd let the clothing issue go. The timing issue would bother me. Also, I would not hire anyone who I can not communicate with.

A friend's nanny overdosed her toddler because she misunderstood medication directions.

I am never late. I told our nanny I would be home by 6pm, because I knew I'd leave at 5 and get home around 5:30. This gives me a buffer of a half hour.

But you pay until 6, right?

Yes, the nanny's hours go until 6. This way if a meeting runs late or I need to stop to do an errand on the way home, I can, without stressing about angering the nanny.

I’m sure your nanny appreciates your promptness but it’s not just about “angering the nanny”. Your child is waiting for you, too. It’s so cruel when parents make their kids insecure and fearful about “where’s mama?” And “”when my mama be home”.

NP- How you get that from the last comment is seriously mind-boggling. You are just looking for reasons to find fault.

NP here. No, the only reason the PP gave for being on time was her nanny’s mood.

I know that, for myself as a nanny, having a heartbroken charge waiting for her constantly late mother was much harder on me than my being disrespected.

How would the child know?

Just because a child can’t tell time doesn’t mean they have no sense of time. They understand routines and patterns and pick up on “oh, after I wake up I have time to start my snack before mommy and daddy walk in”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd let the clothing issue go. The timing issue would bother me. Also, I would not hire anyone who I can not communicate with.

A friend's nanny overdosed her toddler because she misunderstood medication directions.

I am never late. I told our nanny I would be home by 6pm, because I knew I'd leave at 5 and get home around 5:30. This gives me a buffer of a half hour.

But you pay until 6, right?

Yes, the nanny's hours go until 6. This way if a meeting runs late or I need to stop to do an errand on the way home, I can, without stressing about angering the nanny.

I’m sure your nanny appreciates your promptness but it’s not just about “angering the nanny”. Your child is waiting for you, too. It’s so cruel when parents make their kids insecure and fearful about “where’s mama?” And “”when my mama be home”.

NP- How you get that from the last comment is seriously mind-boggling. You are just looking for reasons to find fault.

NP here. No, the only reason the PP gave for being on time was her nanny’s mood.

I know that, for myself as a nanny, having a heartbroken charge waiting for her constantly late mother was much harder on me than my being disrespected.

How would the child know?

NP here. My former employer was often late and my then three-year-old charge knew by our schedule. I gave her dinner at 5:30 and her mother was supposed to be home at 5:30. It did upset my Sweet charge when her mom was late.

Why would you build the schedule that way? That seems like you intentionally designed something to upset your sweet charge.