Pregnant nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow people on this board are so quick to judge and be rude. We all mess up at some points in our lives. We all deserve support and it's wonderful that op has support. Op doesn't want to give up her child and has made that clear so the comments of get an abortion are unnecessary. Op wait as long as you can to tell your employer. I would like to suggest you look into a job with a daycare. Many let you bring your baby for a very reduced rate. It's worth a shot. Try to keep doing your classes and get your degree. Life is going to be hard for a couple years but you can do this. Also apply for government assistance for a couple years until you and your boyfriend are on your feet. I'm praying for you that you will be able to work everything out and have a happy and healthy pregnancy. Good luck!

Thank you so much!

[Anonymous]

I agree, lots of judgemental assholes
You know you can raise a baby. People do it all the time, with all kinds of income, and get by
I know because my grandmother was a refugee during ww2 and she most definitely did survive, with 2 small kids. So can you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow people on this board are so quick to judge and be rude. We all mess up at some points in our lives. We all deserve support and it's wonderful that op has support. Op doesn't want to give up her child and has made that clear so the comments of get an abortion are unnecessary. Op wait as long as you can to tell your employer. I would like to suggest you look into a job with a daycare. Many let you bring your baby for a very reduced rate. It's worth a shot. Try to keep doing your classes and get your degree. Life is going to be hard for a couple years but you can do this. Also apply for government assistance for a couple years until you and your boyfriend are on your feet. I'm praying for you that you will be able to work everything out and have a happy and healthy pregnancy. Good luck!

There is a difference between a one time "screw up" and choosing to embrace that screw up for 9 month, make it worse, and plan all along to mooch and steal from others to support your screw up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He learns at work, it's like getting paid to go to school. He will not have any student loans. I think we will be better off than the average students who have 27k in student debt. I've been going to cheap schools so my debt is small. I don't plan on mooching at all. I agree a little bit of help= watching the child one afternoon every couple weeks, and a stroller etc. i have had a traumatic life, my mom passed at age 1, I had an abusive stepmother, while my dad stood by and blew my social security on his wife. He has sense divorced and knows he owes me for standing by as I was abused and also for the thousands in clothes and nessesitties that I should have gotten with the social security checks instead of working 30+ hours a week starting at age 14 (Minnesota). The last thing I need is to give up this baby, I know it will just be another dramatic event that will leave me depressed. I shouldn't really have to explain all this to you but you obviously don't have a heart and are judging pretty hard

It sounds like you feel like your dad owes you and will deliver. Does HE feel like he owes you and will deliver free childcare and money? And, do you TRUST him to take good care of your child after how well he took care of you? $7k goes quickly.

It also sounds like you feel like you deserve a baby because of the difficulty you went through as a child. This is concerning - babies don't know or care about what you've gone through, and you can't heal yourself by mothering. Of course I have a heart. Sometimes what's most practical is not what feels best in the moment.

[Anonymous]

pp, how do you know what is best in the moment?
No doubt op will be a good mother

Adoption is not supposed to take away a family, this baby is wanted and will definitely be loved.
Whether you call that a screw up or a plan to mooch and steal

[Anonymous]

A bunch of ass holes are giving bullshit advices and judging OP.
You never know what life will turn around, you can be the lucky one and win a lottery. Stay focus and do what is best for you and your baby. Wish you all the luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:pp, how do you know what is best in the moment?
No doubt op will be a good mother

Adoption is not supposed to take away a family, this baby is wanted and will definitely be loved.
Whether you call that a screw up or a plan to mooch and steal

I know based on what OP has shared. She has a very low income in a high COL area. She has an occupation that typically offers minimal if any benefits. She plans to rely on a father who abused, neglected and stole from her for money and childcare. This just doesn't seem like a good start. The reality is that babies need more than love to thrive.

[Anonymous]

Yes, a WWII refugee and a 2016 millennial have a TON in common... wtf.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:pp, how do you know what is best in the moment?
No doubt op will be a good mother

Adoption is not supposed to take away a family, this baby is wanted and will definitely be loved.
Whether you call that a screw up or a plan to mooch and steal

I know based on what OP has shared. She has a very low income in a high COL area. She has an occupation that typically offers minimal if any benefits. She plans to rely on a father who abused, neglected and stole from her for money and childcare. This just doesn't seem like a good start. The reality is that babies need more than love to thrive.

And your point is?

[Anonymous]

I just wanted to say good luck. I know this is a difficult decision either way. My DH was laid off when I was 32 weeks pregnant. At the time it felt like the end of the world. Flash forward 6 years and my DS is the thriving as is both of our careers, and we have a nice house. If you can both pull together you can figure this out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just wanted to say good luck. I know this is a difficult decision either way. My DH was laid off when I was 32 weeks pregnant. At the time it felt like the end of the world. Flash forward 6 years and my DS is the thriving as is both of our careers, and we have a nice house. If you can both pull together you can figure this out.

A nanny and a plumber aren't going t have the fairytale you are spinning for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just wanted to say good luck. I know this is a difficult decision either way. My DH was laid off when I was 32 weeks pregnant. At the time it felt like the end of the world. Flash forward 6 years and my DS is the thriving as is both of our careers, and we have a nice house. If you can both pull together you can figure this out.

A nanny and a plumber aren't going t have the fairytale you are spinning for them.

I know one plumber who lives in a very big house. Some of them do very well

[Anonymous]

Also you are a nanny now. It doesn't mean you need to be for the rest of your life. Could you transfer into something with good benefits at least even if the pay is entry-level.

[Anonymous]

OP here, I have an update!
I told my mom boss at 13 weeks today, she was super excited for me, turns out she had her first when she was 21 and not married, in college. So she is super understanding and supportive! She also raised my hours to full time, we haven't discussed bringing my baby but between my job and my boyfriends we should be able to afford childcare now that I'll be full time. Thank you for all the supportive comments! Im glad I didn't wait until later like some suggested, I was getting too nervous over nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I have an update!
I told my mom boss at 13 weeks today, she was super excited for me, turns out she had her first when she was 21 and not married, in college. So she is super understanding and supportive! She also raised my hours to full time, we haven't discussed bringing my baby but between my job and my boyfriends we should be able to afford childcare now that I'll be full time. Thank you for all the supportive comments! Im glad I didn't wait until later like some suggested, I was getting too nervous over nothing.

That's great OP!! Nice to hear a story of reasonable, adult, strong working relationships between parents and nanny.