| He learns at work, it's like getting paid to go to school. He will not have any student loans. I think we will be better off than the average students who have 27k in student debt. I've been going to cheap schools so my debt is small. I don't plan on mooching at all. I agree a little bit of help= watching the child one afternoon every couple weeks, and a stroller etc. i have had a traumatic life, my mom passed at age 1, I had an abusive stepmother, while my dad stood by and blew my social security on his wife. He has sense divorced and knows he owes me for standing by as I was abused and also for the thousands in clothes and nessesitties that I should have gotten with the social security checks instead of working 30+ hours a week starting at age 14 (Minnesota). The last thing I need is to give up this baby, I know it will just be another dramatic event that will leave me depressed. I shouldn't really have to explain all this to you but you obviously don't have a heart and are judging pretty hard |
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You don't actually need millions to raise a child. Unless your baby has medical issues (hopefully not!) at least the first couple of years can be dealt with on the cheap - borrowing baby gear from friends with older babies, buying cheap or second-hand, etc, breastfeeding if you can - that's free. Your baby doesn't need an expensive cot or designer clothes. All your baby needs is a home where both of the parents are loving and involved. You can totally do it.
As for the job, I would suggest letting them know only when you start showing. Depending on how your pregnancy goes you might as well be able to work into the 8th month, so don't let them fire you before they know something's up. Alternatively you could try looking for a summer job - it could potentially be full-time as the school's are out, and your gym/camp experience would come in handy. Secure a job, give your current family notice and work through the summer. This leaves you with no job or the prospect of a job search while pregnant in the autumn, but depending on how much you're able to earn in the summer it could make more sense for you? Good luck! |
It seems better that you are depressed than have you and the baby both have ruined lives. |
| Your first step should be to change your sociology degree to something that will get you a job. A degree in sociology is a waste of money without a master's degree. Maybe look into something in healthcare. Do not quit school! Do not say anything to your employers for as long as you can, they will most likely not be on board with you bringing your child to work unless you lower your rate by a couple of dollars or more. |
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NP here. OP, I'm not going to discuss your finances. I know plenty of people who raise happy children without a lot of money. Only you and your boyfriend know if you can do this, and you think you can, so best of luck and I hope you're happy.
An issue I do see is whether or not you will be able to do this particular job once you have a baby. I think bringing your baby is a terrible idea. You will be a young FTM and I can't imagine you being able to care for an infant and three older kids effectively. You just don't have the experience. Besides, a parent might not allow you to bring your child as your infant's schedule will absolutely dominate the schedule you will have with the three older children (who are not yours) and that might not be amenable to them. Do you even know they will allow to bring your child to work? Will they give maternity leave or save your job for when you can return? As I see it, you either need a new job that will be more manageable when you have a baby or full time child care so you can keep this job. |
| I'm confused, who's going to watch your baby while you're working? |
You are 21. You are now 21 and pregnant. How much do you expect to make without a college education and wanting to bring your child to work? Very few jobs allow you to bring a child to work - pay for child care. |
She wants a raise and bring baby to work. |
Your dad is a lousy dad but owes you nothing. |
You don't think he owes her 18 years of child care, money, and gifts for the baby?!?!?! HES A MONSTER! |
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Abortion. If taking classes from a for-profit university, stop.
Those are my immediate two suggestions. |
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I had my 2nd child at 21. It's definitely not easy.
At 10 weeks you are probably emotionally bound to your baby already to consider abortion or adoption so that is a non-issue at this point. I would wait until after your first trimester is complete before telling your bosses. This is what most people do anyway. Then let them know. Be prepared for them to let you go anytime after. Super unfair, I know....But then again when is life ever fair?? Caring for a young infant is the toughest job on the planet OP. Constant feelings + changes are tiring, plus the erratic sleep schedule and consistent crying can be both emotionally as well as physically draining. Trust me on this....You WILL be running on empty for awhile. You will be dirty, tired beyond belief and over-worked. Plus caring for four young children daily will be an impossible burden. Especially without an adequate nights sleep beforehand. And when your baby gets sick, you will need to take him/her to the Dr. too during working hours. However if you are working cheap, the family may just decide to keep you on. Good luck to you and your upcoming bundle of joy!
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| *feedings |
| Wow people on this board are so quick to judge and be rude. We all mess up at some points in our lives. We all deserve support and it's wonderful that op has support. Op doesn't want to give up her child and has made that clear so the comments of get an abortion are unnecessary. Op wait as long as you can to tell your employer. I would like to suggest you look into a job with a daycare. Many let you bring your baby for a very reduced rate. It's worth a shot. Try to keep doing your classes and get your degree. Life is going to be hard for a couple years but you can do this. Also apply for government assistance for a couple years until you and your boyfriend are on your feet. I'm praying for you that you will be able to work everything out and have a happy and healthy pregnancy. Good luck! |
My college was tuition free because it was community college and they are free in CA, at least in my area. I have my associates now, the next stop would be a state school. Also I should mention I have about 7k in savings, Not a ton but more than most people I know. |