MB won't tell me she's pregnant. RSS feed

Anonymous
I'm a nanny in a share.
MB #1 is just over 5 months pregnant.
She has yet to tell me. I've known for 3 months (no more wine glasses to wash, saltine packages everywhere, multiple doctor's appointments, etc). We've never had a particularly close relationship, although it is good in a professional way.
I have to pretend not to notice her giant abdomen. It's pretty strange.

MB #2 and I are much closer. We have been from the beginning.
I finally asked MB2 what was going on and why I didn't know.
She said that MB1 asked them not to tell me as they (MB1/DB1) wanted to do it themselves.
This was over a month ago.
MB2 assured me that the share would go on like normal, as that is what the two sets of parents had decided on.

Can anyone venture a guess as to why these people will not tell me about the pregnancy and at what point I should ask them about it?
At this rate, I may not officially find out until her maternity leave ends.
Anonymous
OP here. I am positive that they're not going to replace me with another nanny.
Anonymous
You're taking this too personally. Admittedly it's a little late in the game for her to still being ignoring the elephant in the room but there can be any number of reasons why a woman is reluctant to discuss her pregnancy.

Worst case scenario is that there is some sort of medical concern on her mind. Maybe there is something highrisk about her pregnancy or likely delivery that is making her nervous or unsure. Or maybe she hasn't actually figured out what she's going to do about maternity leave, nanny share, life decisions, etc... Or maybe she's actually not happy about it and is trying to put off dealing w/ necessary conversations and realities until she's ready. Maybe she and her husband aren't on the same page re planning yet and she's trying to spare you any uncertainty while they're working it out. Etc...

Anyway, don't take it so personally. If things are good w/ her professionally, and the other MB has assured you that your job is safe, then you need to back off.
Anonymous
Agree that she probably feels like once she tells you she'll have to be ready to answer questions about their childcare plans and they probably haven't reached a decision yet. Less likely but also possible are ongoing medical concerns. If she's had multiple late-stage miscarriages or if there is some genetic stuff going on she may just not be ready to talk about it yet. Don't take it personally, just keep doing your job and pretending you don't know.
Anonymous
My MB had to terminate at 5 months because of chromosomal abnormalities. Why are you making this all about you? Get a life.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My MB had to terminate at 5 months because of chromosomal abnormalities. Why are you making this all about you? Get a life.


Please f*** off.
Anonymous
OP here. Everyone knows. Family, work, my other bosses.
Everyone.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Everyone knows. Family, work, my other bosses.
Everyone.


How do you know that "everyone" knows if she hasn't told you? I agree with previous posters that you are making this about you when it's probably not about you at all. There are A LOT of complicated feelings when you are pregnant and you have no idea what may really be going on.
Anonymous
Ok people, lighten up. Why must so many things have an overly dramatic reason?

OP, I would ask now.
Anonymous
Aside from 18:34, all of the bitchy, condescending responses are exactly why DCUM has turned into the giant joke it has become. You all are shallow, bored and insignificant.
You can spread your negativity all you want. I will not participate in this BS any further.
Peace!
Anonymous
Definately odd behavior on her part, OP. Which house do you use for the share?
Anonymous
I kind of feel like maybe she doesn't see it as all that important to inform you? If you guys have a very business like relationship, she likely doesn't see you as a friend or even as an equal. She will tell you when she needs to, and you can take it or leave it basically.
Anonymous
Why is this woman assuming that OP even wants to take on a newborn?? They haven't even asked OP how much extra she wants to charge IF she wants to do the additional workload.

OP, I would not be surprised if they dump all this extra work on you and throw you your extra dollar or two an hour. Sorry, but f*** that c***.

Bring it up, tell her congratulations and how happy you are for them. Next ask point blank, what she had in mind for the baby's care. Just do it, OP, tomorrow. You'll have a fantastic weekend after you get this done.
Anonymous
Lol, so she probably knows you know but no one is saying anything. I just find that a little funny.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My MB had to terminate at 5 months because of chromosomal abnormalities. Why are you making this all about you? Get a life.


Please f*** off.




No, YOU f*** off. The nanny isn't family or a friend and it's up to the MB when SHE decides to share this information. My MB did have to terminate, so I'm not sure why I'm being told to f*** off. Next time she gor pregnant I could obviously see she was pregnant and she waited 4 months to tell me.
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