Nanny said charge was a PITA.

[Anonymous]

I'm a nanny and my charge and I were at the park. We bumped into this other nanny and I recognize her charge. Her charge, was a child that I was originally given the position to care for, but I turn the down. I was excited to see the little girl, to see how big she has gotten, I remember how tiny she was. I didn't introduce myself as the original candidate. I started small talk with her, I didn't see why surprising her the fact that she was their second choice was a good idea. We chatted here and there, I asked her questions about the little girl and how she likes the job. Before she could answer, her phone rang. I stepped away but was within an ear shot of her. I overheard her say to her friend, 'Omg. She's such a PITA. This is getting old and I'm not looking forward nap time'. I'm not sure who she was referring to, I'm going to assume it was the little girl. When I did interview, I was forewarned napping was something she just could not get comfortable with. She was a light sleeper and you had to hold her until she was asleep. The nanny ended the conversation and she kept checking her phone, while following he child around. She wasn't bad but she was not as attentive. She did play with her, but also kept checking her phone. The mom and I don't have any hard feelings towards each other. I don't talk to her, but don't see why I can't at least let her know she deserves a better nanny! Should I something?

[Anonymous]

No you should not something. She was doing her job, and you overheard a private conversation. It's not your place to decide if "she deserves a better nanny".

[Anonymous]

Get a life, OP.
If you think a child is neglected or abused, that's different.

[Anonymous]

How do you know she wasn't just having a bad day? As a nanny, of course I want to be at my best every single day but I'm not perfect. She wasn't doing anything to hurt the child or put her in danger. Stay out of it.

[Anonymous]

If you think it was clearly subpar behavior then I would mention it. Unless the little girl overheats the PITA comment I would not mention that though since I think the same if my own kids sometimes. Only issue is if the little girl hears and understands.

[Anonymous]

I think you'd be seriously over-stepping if you said something. This doesn't sound like a particularly big deal, we all have hard days, you're not even sure exactly what the other person was talking about, maybe the kid is kind of a pill sometimes, etc...

Doesn't sound like this nanny was doing anything wrong, you just didn't care for what you read into her side of the conversation on which you were eavesdropping.

Honestly your whole post reflects more poorly on you than her.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not. And you don't know you were the first choice, either.

[Anonymous]

What is PITA

[Anonymous]

OK as a mom who has had bad experiences with nannies in the past, I think you would be doing a great deed by talking with the parent. It's not just that she called her a "PITA" but personally it drives me crazy how nannies are constantly on the phone while they are supposed to be watching people's prized blessings (their kids). Nannies, if you are on this forum and frequently talk on your phone while watching the children, HANG UP! Talk on YOUR time, not when watching children. checking your phone constantly is going to have a bad ending one day.

UGH. OP you sound like a responsible person, do what you feel is best, but from a mom's perspective, I would appreciate your feedback if I was comfortable enough to offer you the job in the first place.

[Anonymous]

I would stay out of it for now, but continue to socialize w/this nanny and find out just how she really feels about the little girl. If she does anything else to make you suspect she does not have this little girl's best interest at heart, then I would most definitely let the mother know.

[Anonymous]

OP, are you now sorry that you didn't take that job?

[Anonymous]

No, keep your mouth shut and worry about your own charge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OK as a mom who has had bad experiences with nannies in the past, I think you would be doing a great deed by talking with the parent. It's not just that she called her a "PITA" but personally it drives me crazy how nannies are constantly on the phone while they are supposed to be watching people's prized blessings (their kids). Nannies, if you are on this forum and frequently talk on your phone while watching the children, HANG UP! Talk on YOUR time, not when watching children. checking your phone constantly is going to have a bad ending one day.

UGH. OP you sound like a responsible person, do what you feel is best, but from a mom's perspective, I would appreciate your feedback if I was comfortable enough to offer you the job in the first place.

As an MB, I have to agree with this. My nanny pops up on gchat as being on her phone sometimes when she's watching my kids, but usually during naptime and many days not at all (I realize she could block me so I don't see, but given the pattern of her showing up that seems unlikely). If I saw that she was on her phone a lot I would totally talk to her about it. I don't spend time on my phone or laptop in front of my kids unless it's unavoidable and I don't want my nanny doing so either.

[Anonymous]

How hipocrite of you when you are obviously doing the same thing at the playground. The only difference between you and the other nanny is that she was checking her phone while you were checking other nannies, GET a LIFE OP.

And remember: what goes around, comes around. It's innevitable!

[Anonymous]

I adore my charge. I would throw myself in front of a bus if it would protect him, I shower him with hugs and kisses all day, and have never so much as raised my voice to him (well, aside from a loud and serious-voice "no!" when he was first learning to explore and wanted to play with power outlets) and I have, privately, referred to him as a jerk on rough days. Sometimes kids are jers. Sometimes grown-ups are too. It's just life. I don't think you should say anything at all because you have no idea of the context of her comment - maybe this was her first day back after two weeks with grandma and the girl's being more difficult as her schedule is disrupted. Maybe the comment was in reference to her MB ("omg she's being such a PITA, I'm not looking forward to naptime when I have to sit down with her and do blahblahblah."). As you said, you have ASSUMED it was about the little girl but have not offered any context to say so decisively. Keep your mouth shut and next time assume the BEST until given reason not to.

And before anyone starts calling me a terrible nanny, DC's mom - my MB - has called him a jerk to me herself. Obviously we both love him and it is just a way to let off steam occasionally.