Feeling nervous about picking a nanny

[Anonymous]

OP, I have a question for you…..

Did you feel like this after meeting/hiring your previous Nanny??

Anyway - I agree, this is a very big + important decision made even a little more anxiety-driven by the fact that you will not be in close vicinity to your child(ren.)

I know that you wanted to hear if anyone on here has felt your concerns in similar situations.
Unfortunately I have not since I am a Nanny.

However if it makes you feel better > I take my responsibility 100% seriously.
I make sure any child I watch is well-cared for, safe, happy & engaged.
I also tend to form a bond w/the child even after two weeks!

I could never harm a child nor neglect them.

I wish you all the best in whatever you decide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are planning to set up cameras as PP says, she might reject your offer. Some nannies won't feel comfortable working like that. It's a lack of trust you are having since the very first beginning. The cameras topic; it's the first thing you should have said right in the interview; no when you already interviewed with her and see if she will agree working like that.
No just contact her again just to tell her that Opss.. you forgot that the position will requiere the nanny feel comfortable and be watches all day with cameras all around.

And some nannies like me encourage cameras. I want my employers to see how hard I work and how happy their kids are. I wouldn’t work in a home without cameras.

Known troll.

I am absolutely not a troll. Ask Jeff. I’m a nanny who posts/reads here frequently.

Ask Jeff and then come back and apologize.

I’m still waiting for my apology.

Move on. Nobody cares who is Jeff. It this make you happy we will se Hi to Jeff from you. Hi Jeff Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are planning to set up cameras as PP says, she might reject your offer. Some nannies won't feel comfortable working like that. It's a lack of trust you are having since the very first beginning. The cameras topic; it's the first thing you should have said right in the interview; no when you already interviewed with her and see if she will agree working like that.
No just contact her again just to tell her that Opss.. you forgot that the position will requiere the nanny feel comfortable and be watches all day with cameras all around.

And some nannies like me encourage cameras. I want my employers to see how hard I work and how happy their kids are. I wouldn’t work in a home without cameras.

Known troll.

I am absolutely not a troll. Ask Jeff. I’m a nanny who posts/reads here frequently.

Ask Jeff and then come back and apologize.

I’m still waiting for my apology.

Move on. Nobody cares who is Jeff. It this make you happy we will se Hi to Jeff from you. Hi Jeff Lol.

“No one cares who is Jeff.” Nice grammar!

Jeff is the owner of this site. Hit “report” on the bottom of the post or ask him on the website feedback page. Jeff can identify trolls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are planning to set up cameras as PP says, she might reject your offer. Some nannies won't feel comfortable working like that. It's a lack of trust you are having since the very first beginning. The cameras topic; it's the first thing you should have said right in the interview; no when you already interviewed with her and see if she will agree working like that.
No just contact her again just to tell her that Opss.. you forgot that the position will requiere the nanny feel comfortable and be watches all day with cameras all around.

And some nannies like me encourage cameras. I want my employers to see how hard I work and how happy their kids are. I wouldn’t work in a home without cameras.

Known troll.

I am absolutely not a troll. Ask Jeff. I’m a nanny who posts/reads here frequently.

Ask Jeff and then come back and apologize.

I’m still waiting for my apology.

Move on. Nobody cares who is Jeff. It this make you happy we will se Hi to Jeff from you. Hi Jeff Lol.

You said the poster was a “known troll”. Easy way to prove it - ask Jeff, the owner and administrator of this site, and he can look it up. Just go to website feedback and ask.

You have to stop accusing posters of being “known trolls” because they disagreed with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here -- I checked her references (but again, those are people I don't know so I have to take with a grain of salt). I did a background and driving check and she came back clear. We have a nanny who we hired during the pandemic. I was working from home, so I could keep an eye and ear out. After two years, I had full trust in her and her decision making. I will not have that luxury this time. Our nanny is moving, so we need to find someone else.

I am not trying to replicate her and know that I can't really. So I am trying to let the new nanny stand on her own. The things that were great about her seem really great. She brought the kids bubbles to the in person interview. She engaged with the kids and took a "tour" of my oldest's favorite spots in the yard. The things I worry about are not deal breakers but are things I loved about our outgoing nanny. (She made connections with other families and I don't totally get that vibe from the prospective nanny -- but I also don't make connections with other families at pick up. So it is not a deal breaker.) She is a little more "chill" and not bubbly. But again, safety and engagement are my focus, so chipper isn't a deal breaker but it makes it hard to feel 100% confident in my decision.

I am not sure if I need to keep looking (although from a timing perspective I don't totally have that option) or just roll with it and see if my worries go away. I know what I want which is either my old nanny stays or I found her exact clone (neither of which happened). But, decision making is so hard for me and this one matters so much.

I guess I was hoping to hear that others had those doubts but they went away and nanny was great or you knew right away and found someone else. I don't know if the doubt is nerves or something else, if that makes sense.

OP no child care provider is perfect. Not even your mom or you or your DH. She sounds like she was making an effort. What are your concerns? As long as there are no safety issues, she is reliable, and follows direction, it doesn't sound like you have any real issue other than unfamiliarity. Build in a probation period, do several check-ins, and go for it. You already had one candidate ghost you, and you said you don't have a lot of time. Also, I assume you are paying on the books, etc, so you are not putting her or your family in an awkward position if it doesn't work out.

[Anonymous]

I was a nervous nelly! For reasons that you mention, OP, I opted for daycare. There is more oversight and accountability, I think. (Though not at a home daycare--that's the worst of all worlds).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was a nervous nelly! For reasons that you mention, OP, I opted for daycare. There is more oversight and accountability, I think. (Though not at a home daycare--that's the worst of all worlds).

You’ve clearly never worked in a daycare. I’ve worked in two well-respected daycare centers and there is no “oversight” when a teacher makes a very bad decision regarding the kids. The administration tells you to cover it over. And where I worked, the teachers would show up hung over or high all the time. Little ones were routinely hit, shoved, and had toys pulled away by other kids and the teachers could do nothing. Truly, it’s bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a nervous nelly! For reasons that you mention, OP, I opted for daycare. There is more oversight and accountability, I think. (Though not at a home daycare--that's the worst of all worlds).

You’ve clearly never worked in a daycare. I’ve worked in two well-respected daycare centers and there is no “oversight” when a teacher makes a very bad decision regarding the kids. The administration tells you to cover it over. And where I worked, the teachers would show up hung over or high all the time. Little ones were routinely hit, shoved, and had toys pulled away by other kids and the teachers could do nothing. Truly, it’s bad.

+1. I worked in a great daycare, very sought after and expensive, and I wouldn’t send my kids there on a bet.

[Anonymous]

The big daycare centers are the worst. The babies don't nap, the caregivers dont have experience and some babies never drink the amounts they are supposed to take, and all kids are mostly ignored most of the day, and you should try and stop at lunch time where some kids literally fall asleep with face in their plate, and kids eat from each others plate and teachers pretend not to see. I saw it wit my own eyes, expensive center. This is all because the money go to the owners, teachers get pennies.
There are some great in home daycare places but those are usually full, and known by word of mouth mostly. There, the owner makes money and take care of kids, and has to be very, very good to keep attracting families. Of course, nannies are still best option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The big daycare centers are the worst. The babies don't nap, the caregivers dont have experience and some babies never drink the amounts they are supposed to take, and all kids are mostly ignored most of the day, and you should try and stop at lunch time where some kids literally fall asleep with face in their plate, and kids eat from each others plate and teachers pretend not to see. I saw it wit my own eyes, expensive center. This is all because the money go to the owners, teachers get pennies.
There are some great in home daycare places but those are usually full, and known by word of mouth mostly. There, the owner makes money and take care of kids, and has to be very, very good to keep attracting families. Of course, nannies are still best option.

Awww that's so sad to hear. As a nanny myself I feel bad for those little ones. I have never worked in a day care but just reading this wow .. really sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are planning to set up cameras as PP says, she might reject your offer. Some nannies won't feel comfortable working like that. It's a lack of trust you are having since the very first beginning. The cameras topic; it's the first thing you should have said right in the interview; no when you already interviewed with her and see if she will agree working like that.
No just contact her again just to tell her that Opss.. you forgot that the position will requiere the nanny feel comfortable and be watches all day with cameras all around.

And some nannies like me encourage cameras. I want my employers to see how hard I work and how happy their kids are. I wouldn’t work in a home without cameras.

Known troll.

I am absolutely not a troll. Ask Jeff. I’m a nanny who posts/reads here frequently.

Ask Jeff and then come back and apologize.

I’m still waiting for my apology.

Move on. Nobody cares who is Jeff. It this make you happy we will se Hi to Jeff from you. Hi Jeff Lol.

“No one cares who is Jeff.” Nice grammar!

Jeff is the owner of this site. Hit “report” on the bottom of the post or ask him on the website feedback page. Jeff can identify trolls.

Go and focus on your charges instead of bullying people here. Nannies like you make parents worried

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are planning to set up cameras as PP says, she might reject your offer. Some nannies won't feel comfortable working like that. It's a lack of trust you are having since the very first beginning. The cameras topic; it's the first thing you should have said right in the interview; no when you already interviewed with her and see if she will agree working like that.
No just contact her again just to tell her that Opss.. you forgot that the position will requiere the nanny feel comfortable and be watches all day with cameras all around.

And some nannies like me encourage cameras. I want my employers to see how hard I work and how happy their kids are. I wouldn’t work in a home without cameras.

Known troll.

I am absolutely not a troll. Ask Jeff. I’m a nanny who posts/reads here frequently.

Ask Jeff and then come back and apologize.

I’m still waiting for my apology.

Move on. Nobody cares who is Jeff. It this make you happy we will se Hi to Jeff from you. Hi Jeff Lol.

“No one cares who is Jeff.” Nice grammar!

Jeff is the owner of this site. Hit “report” on the bottom of the post or ask him on the website feedback page. Jeff can identify trolls.

Go and focus on your charges instead of bullying people here. Nannies like you make parents worried

You waited 5 days to resurrect this thread. You the pick me doormat that tries to get Jeff on her side is the only bully I see here. There was no reason to respond this thread was forgotten/dead. You seem like you have mental illness and I’d be very uncomfortable leaving small children in your care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly you should just stay home. Not being able to keep an eye and ear open let’s me know you have control issues. I wouldn’t want to work for you

NP. You sound awful.