Au pairs are terrible, done with this program never again,especially w/J1 ban

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I also agree with an au pair not being the best choice for full-time care for children under 5.

Finally, this year is a mess. The visa ban has turned the process of matching with an in country au pair into a competition of who has the fanciest house, cars, beach town, least amount of children, etc. The cultural exchange aspect has been completely compromised.

This is true. We picked up an in country AP and are paying way over minimum. We are also living at our beach house until late September. Our OOC AP will arrive post ban; when hopefully things are more normal. But if you do not have a car for your AP, second home or other perks forget about in country. It is legit a premium market for them.

We have an AuPair and NEVER bring her to our beach house. ESPECIALLY since the pandemic. We need a break from her! We do let her use it with friends when we or our friends and family are not using it, but she still has to pay the cleaning fee and put down a damage deposit. I have no idea who her friends are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And the question I come back to is why is there a premium market for au pairs? I had an okay, not terrible experience. But the childcare was average, keeping the kids alive, but not actively engaging them and it was a lot of work for me to host a young person in my home and try to provide a cultural exchange for her. Why provide a car, high stipend, vacations up front before you even know if this person is going to do a stellar job of caring for your children?

Because you’re getting cheap childcare and possibly a split shift nobody else wants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And the question I come back to is why is there a premium market for au pairs? I had an okay, not terrible experience. But the childcare was average, keeping the kids alive, but not actively engaging them and it was a lot of work for me to host a young person in my home and try to provide a cultural exchange for her. Why provide a car, high stipend, vacations up front before you even know if this person is going to do a stellar job of caring for your children?

Because you’re getting cheap childcare and possibly a split shift nobody else wants.

It’s definitely not cheap childcare, but yes to the flexible hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And the question I come back to is why is there a premium market for au pairs? I had an okay, not terrible experience. But the childcare was average, keeping the kids alive, but not actively engaging them and it was a lot of work for me to host a young person in my home and try to provide a cultural exchange for her. Why provide a car, high stipend, vacations up front before you even know if this person is going to do a stellar job of caring for your children?

Because you’re getting cheap childcare and possibly a split shift nobody else wants.

It’s definitely not cheap childcare, but yes to the flexible hours.

Compared to other in-home options? It’s cheap.

[Anonymous]

I watch my neighbors go thru 3-4 care.com people during my year with an ap.

For ES age kids AP is the best option if you have room for them. We used a nanny pre school phases but then we to an AP over nanny. Mainly for snow days (nannies never make it) and split schedule.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

[Anonymous]

As a single mom Au pairs are my lifesavers. 3 wonderful (pretty religious) Brazilians.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

The disclaimer. As though having no standards at all is somehow a virtue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

+1.

A former colleague of mine was a sex worker as an undergrad at Columbia. She is now a professor at Univ. of Maryland.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

The disclaimer. As though having no standards at all is somehow a virtue.

Uh no I’m just saying I don’t have my eyes tightly closed to sex work and wouldn’t know if my au pairs were sex workers. But they haven’t been. It seems like an urban legend amplified by au pair-hating nannies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

+1.

A former colleague of mine was a sex worker as an undergrad at Columbia. She is now a professor at Univ. of Maryland.

Wow, then she lied on her bar application. Yikes!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

+1.

A former colleague of mine was a sex worker as an undergrad at Columbia. She is now a professor at Univ. of Maryland.

Wow, then she lied on her bar application. Yikes!

There’s no “were you a sex worker” question on the bar app.

[Anonymous]

Program is garbage now, the transition documents are all lies

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been in the program 5 years and I have never heard of this sugar baby nonsense except on this board. Maybe it’s because my au pairs have all been uptight Germans.

And FWIW some of my closest friends have been sex workers. I have nothing against sex work.

+1.

A former colleague of mine was a sex worker as an undergrad at Columbia. She is now a professor at Univ. of Maryland.

Wow, then she lied on her bar application. Yikes!

Not necessarily a lawyer?