Live-in curfew nightmare

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 24 and live with my parents after my failed long term relationship. My curfew is 10 pm. Definitely trying to move out. I think maybe in your case she’s worried that you won’t be as alert or whatever in the Am etc what time do you start ?

I'm so confused as to why you have a curfew at age 24.

[Anonymous]

I would be looking for a new position immediately and with all of my efforts! I would also attempt to salad dressing this in the meantime and figure out what the issue is. I would not be there at all in the weekends. Also, as a live-in, does she have to give you 30 days notice to evict you?

[Anonymous]

I believe adults should be responsible (I am not implying that the poster is irresponsible). If there are infants (or perhaps other occupants) in the house who may be awaken by late or noisy entry consideration should be given to that.

The question is why would any semi reasonable person/family introduce a curfew when that is no issue? Perhaps there is more to this story...

Find a family that share your lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 24 and live with my parents after my failed long term relationship. My curfew is 10 pm. Definitely trying to move out. I think maybe in your case she’s worried that you won’t be as alert or whatever in the Am etc what time do you start ?

I'm so confused as to why you have a curfew at age 24.

Those are my mother’s requirements for me to live with her. She’s extremely religious and doesn’t believe in sex before marriage, drinking and thinks she can control me by having me come home by 10. Like I said, I want to move out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you should stay in their space all night long until you go to bed. When they are in the kitchen you be in the kitchen. If the tv is in the family room, sit in there at night. They might start to rethink giving you a curfew. Passive aggressive, yes, but they are being unreasonable.

This is PERFECT. Please do this for at least a month. This is parents main complaint of live in nannies.

[Anonymous]

That’s mental abuse; you need to report her. Really some employers are sick in the head. But don’t worry what goes around comes around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you should stay in their space all night long until you go to bed. When they are in the kitchen you be in the kitchen. If the tv is in the family room, sit in there at night. They might start to rethink giving you a curfew. Passive aggressive, yes, but they are being unreasonable.

This is PERFECT. Please do this for at least a month. This is parents main complaint of live in nannies.

I just love this idea!
OP: Do it!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 24 and live with my parents after my failed long term relationship. My curfew is 10 pm. Definitely trying to move out. I think maybe in your case she’s worried that you won’t be as alert or whatever in the Am etc what time do you start ?

I'm so confused as to why you have a curfew at age 24.

Those are my mother’s requirements for me to live with her. She’s extremely religious and doesn’t believe in sex before marriage, drinking and thinks she can control me by having me come home by 10. Like I said, I want to move out

I have always wondered why parents think sex only happens after Midnight,!

[Anonymous]

OP here. I spoke with my mb about this last night and it... did not go well. I'm not a very confrontational person so I probably didn't handle it as directly as I should have. Instead I said that with the curfew I wasn't clear on what she expected me to be doing in the evenings and her response was "if you're bored and you can fold and iron the laundry." This so wasn't the point if what I was asking, but also is another thing that isn't supposed to be part of my job!

[Anonymous]

Get out and the sooner the better.

[Anonymous]

Yeah you need to get out of there ASAP and don’t give her any notice. This is exactly the type of job that deserves paid on Friday, notice on Friday.

- nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I spoke with my mb about this last night and it... did not go well. I'm not a very confrontational person so I probably didn't handle it as directly as I should have. Instead I said that with the curfew I wasn't clear on what she expected me to be doing in the evenings and her response was "if you're bored and you can fold and iron the laundry." This so wasn't the point if what I was asking, but also is another thing that isn't supposed to be part of my job!

Yeah, that is a clear sign this is not a good environment. I am a MB.

[Anonymous]

Definitely start working on your exit strategy. They obviously don't have even the most basic respect for you.
I host au pairs and would never dream of having a curfew. I have enough trouble keeping my children in line - I don't need to treat grown adults like children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That’s mental abuse; you need to report her. Really some employers are sick in the head. But don’t worry what goes around comes around.

A curfew is not abuse, how ridiculous and dismissive of true abuse. OP can leave today if she wants, and hopefully she does!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I spoke with my mb about this last night and it... did not go well. I'm not a very confrontational person so I probably didn't handle it as directly as I should have. Instead I said that with the curfew I wasn't clear on what she expected me to be doing in the evenings and her response was "if you're bored and you can fold and iron the laundry." This so wasn't the point if what I was asking, but also is another thing that isn't supposed to be part of my job!

Ugh OP sorry. That sucks.